Page 19

CHAPTER 18

Noah

W hen I heard someone yell ghost , I didn’t think I would find Reed on the ground shivering and tossing around on the floor. I was certain it was someone else, but when he mumbled ghost again, my heart stopped. But that wasn’t what surprised me, as everyone has nightmares. It was the fact he was no longer wearing that muzzle over his face. For the past week I’ve never seen him take it off. The question was always in the back of my mind, but I was always too chicken shit to ask.

Even now, the question hangs there, but I can’t focus on that. Not when Reed's lips are on mine.

But as soon as it happens, he’s pulling away. Fear zips through me, hating the fact he probably regrets it. I open my mouth to beg him not to, even if he wants to forget it. I'd rather tell him it’ll never happen again than for him to regret it.

“What is it about you?” He whispers. His hand leaves my throat, sliding up the side of my face through my hair. I swallow around the lump in my throat, not sure if he wants me to answer his question or not.

I hold my breath, waiting to see what he’s going to do. My brain freezes when he leans down, pressing his lips against mine. A moan slips from me as his tongue slides across my mouth, seeking entry. I’m too happy to oblige. A whole slew of feelings comes crashing over me; raw and unfiltered ones hit me like a ton of bricks.

My fingers slide through his hair, gripping the ends of his black hair. Every nerve in my body lights up; the strokes of his tongue against mine have my cock hardening in my pants. I try to grind up and create some kind of friction.

But Reed holds me in place, his tongue moving in my mouth. I’ve kissed a few people before, but never like this. It’s never been breathtaking, and that’s what Reed does to me. He leaves me catching my breath.

“Fuck,” Reed sighs against my mouth.

I open my mouth to say something, anything at this point. But I have no words, none. Reed has been the only person to leave me completely speechless, and he does it without even trying. As much as I hate it, I know deep down, way deep down, that I like it. I like that he calms my brain enough that the words don’t come easy.

“Reed?” I finally whisper.

“Hmmm?” He hums. He rests his forehead against mine. I blink my eyes open, happy to find his are closed. It’s then I see the jagged white, raised scars going from a little above the corner of his mouth all the way to his left eye. I reach up, and my hand rests over his cheek.

“W–what happened here?” I hate to ask, to ruin this moment, but it’s the only thing I can think to ask. Even if it’s not the real question I want to ask, it’s enough for now.

When I don’t think he’s going to say anything, he finally sits back and says, “Nothing.” While I don’t believe him, he’s obviously done with whatever just happened between us.

I don’t like that answer. And against my wishes, Reed pulls back and climbs to his feet. The only thing I can be glad about is he looks as lost as I feel.

I swallow, glancing around the men's bathroom, trying to think where we go from here when Reed clears his throat, getting my attention.

“We should probably head out soon.” He doesn’t leave room for me to argue or question him. Reed bends down, gathering his bag and sweatshirt off the ground before he rushes out of the restroom.

Everything feels too still and quiet. Slowly getting to my feet, I stand there looking in the mirror, wondering why I even put myself in the position to get hurt.

My chest tightens, and the lump in my throat grows heavy with every passing second. Having feelings for Reed is like looking over the edge at the waves; it could save me from myself or completely crush me. But with every second that passes, I can feel the world crumbling beneath my feet. It’s either going to swallow me whole, or I need to jump headfirst.

I bite the inside of my cheek, my jaw clenching as I need to focus on anything else but the beating organ inside my damn chest. It does nothing but create problems for me. I can’t be vulnerable in front of him. He’ll think I’m nothing but a sissy bitch who can’t control his emotions.

It was just a fucking kiss, nothing less and nothing more.

Even if I want to be more, I can’t. I can’t let him control me like this.

My hand trembles as I grab my bag from the corner and hike it onto my shoulders. With a tight smile, I make my way out of the restroom, half surprised to find Reed leaning against the desk. His foot crosses the other; his arms sit perfectly against his chest. He shouldn’t be that hot while the world is in the middle of ending, but he is. His mask is put back in place, hiding everything but his eyes from me. I knew I shouldn’t have asked what happened; it was too soon. I put him in an uncomfortable place.

Reed’s eyes shift towards me, but he doesn’t say anything as I approach. Tucking my hands into my pockets, I shift nervously on my feet. I watch him push off from the desk and head towards the door. I hold my breath as I follow him, unsure where we go from here.

The sun begins to rise, casting a sliver of light as we head East. I reach back into my backpack and pull out a protein bar, shoving half of it into my mouth. If Reed didn’t plan on talking to me for the rest of our journey, I was just going to have to make it difficult to ignore me. Even if that meant being obnoxious.

I’m going to make him regret kissing me and then ignoring me.