Page 15 of Until You’re Breathless (Insatiable #1)

He doesn’t smile, but if I know him like I think I still know him, he’s smiling on the inside.

He opens the door and I stand there, watching him walk to his car.

I close the door and rest my forehead on it.

The tears pour down my face uncontrollably.

My chest heaves with emotion. I haven’t cried this hard since my baby cat Charles died when I was a kid.

I stand there, weeping against the door like a baby.

And nothing can stop me....except one thing. ..

Jagger

I’m not stupid. I know that was a huge blow.

She didn’t see that coming at all. Not the truth about the past, not the hiring her on the spot, nothing.

Bowie is alone and has been to hell and back, and something in my stomach is telling me to go back and knock on the door.

So I do. As I approach it, I can already hear the strange noises, and I realize that she’s bawling her fucking eyes out on the other side of the door.

My heart breaks. I tap on the door and it stops for a moment.

She knows that it’s me. It can only be me, otherwise the security would have tipped her off.

As she opens the door, I see her face covered in tears.

I swallow, looking at her like she’s a lost fucking puppy, and I fold.

As I open my arms, feeling my own eyes prick with unshed fucking tears, I pull her to me, holding her tight.

Hey, I’m not a fucking heartless prick, okay?

We have a long history together. She was my first and last love, and when someone you care about, whether it was once upon a time or now, or both, if you’ve got any shred of remorse or care in your body, you’re there for them.

While she whimpers in my arms, I find my grip on her getting stronger and stronger, as my arms snake around her body.

Goddammit, it feels so good to hold her again.

It’s just like it was. Her body fits in mine like a glove.

As she cries softly in my ear, I want so badly to kiss her hair, like I used to.

To kiss her soft cheek. To comfort her more than I am right now.

But just being held seems to help. “It’s okay, Bowie.

Everything is going to be okay.” I murmur in her ear, wrapping my fingers around her stray curls, caressing her body, swaying slightly from side to side.

“I’m so sorry.” She breathes into my ear. “I wish I could take it back.”

“I wish I could, too. But we can’t, sweetheart.”

She nods numbly, still holding me close.

I tuck my head into her neck once more, drawing in a deep breath, smelling her hair, drinking her in.

But I know that I can’t feel for her what I want to feel.

We can’t work together if that happens, nor do I think she’d ever be ready for that, or that we can ever go back to what we once had.

That would be impossible. That would be unhealthy.

That would also be dead wrong, after all that’s happened in the time between.

So I resolve myself to what we have now.

A professional friendship, if you will. And that all depends on how things go starting tomorrow.

My mom always tells me that when someone need a hug, you let them be the one to pull back first, and this time is no exception.

Bowie finally pulls back, and it breaks my heart to see her like this.

She may come off all tough and ready to take over the world, but there’s a world of hurt inside there.

“I’m sorry for what he put you through, Bowie. Truly, I am.”

With that, she kisses my forehead. “You haven’t changed a bit, Jagger. You’re still the sweetest man I know. Always will be.”

I go for cute, snapping my fingers. “Aw, shucks, ma’am.”

That gets a chuckle. “And you always knew when to make me laugh and when to let me cry.”

“Honey, timing is everything. It’s a hard lesson to learn, but when you learn it, it sticks.”

She’s looking at me with dinner plate eyes again. “I’m sorry for what I put you through, too, Jagger. I was a silly teenager. I didn’t deserve you.”

“Like I said, honey. It’s in the past. Leave it there, okay?”

A nod. “It’s there for good now.”

“Good.” I don’t want to let her go, but I know that I have to. “Now, no more crying, okay?”

“I promise.”

“Okay.” I kiss her forehead. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Bright and early.”

She stands at the door until I pull out of the driveway. When I get home, I have not one, but two guests sitting at my front gate.

“Well, if it isn’t Mutt and Jeff.”

“I tracked you.” Rush admits. “Halen tipped me off though.”

“So you knew that I was at Jinny’s house, and therefore, with Bowie.”

“I won the bet.” Axl brags. “Got any beer in the house?”

“Nope. But you’re welcome to go to the bar down the street if you like.” I answer facetiously.

“Na, that’s okay. I brought some. It’s just in the car.”

“Asshole.” I snuffle. “Well, bring it in before my neighbors call the cops on me for drinking in public.”

“Who says they’re for you?”

“Fuck you, asshole.” I laugh, as Rush follows me into the house.

“So, are you going to make Halen stop fucking whining about Jinny and Bowie, and pull them off his roster, or what.”

“Yeah, did you cave, man?” Axl says, rubbing it in.

With an exasperated sigh, I answer. “Look, the girl is just about the smartest, most hard-working chick on the planet. You know we spent two hours in my shop together this morning... two hours ...” I lift two fingers up in the air.

“And she already gave me like ten ideas, and she helped me confirm two of my own. I’d be stupid not to bring her on and that’s the truth. ”

“Good for you, man. But now you’ve got to worry about that other prick.” Axl states.

“Why, you’re already here.” I joke, and he elbows me. “Yeah, I know. But the ball is in her court this time, man.”

“Good.” Rush states. “It’s about time a woman of that caliber was on the top of the mountain instead of holding it up.”

“From the look of it, that asshole held her back. You know he’s had her doing all the fucking grunt work in the office, instead of letting her get her hands dirty? Fucking asshole.”

“That’s the difference between you two, man.

” Axl offers. “You see her potential totally different than he does. You see it as an opportunity and that insecure asshole sees it as a threat. It’s just too goddamn bad that she was blinded by love.

I’m glad he fucked around on her. Looks good on him. Karma is a real bitch.”

“Everything happens for a reason.” Rush confers. “It’s just too bad that she got hurt in the process.”

I breathe in deeply and then breathe out again. “Let’s just hope that she can get her head back on straight fast enough.”

“Why do you say that? Does she seem fucked up?” Axl asks.

“No, just hurting. She cried pretty hard.”

Rush lifts a brow. “Yeah? In front of you? Over Boston?”

“Not just over Boston.” I hesitate, but I know that there’s no point in holding back. “I told her the truth. I told her that I never fucked around on her.”

“And she believed you?” Rush inquires.

“She didn’t have much choice. I had Kayla on the phone to prove it.”

Rush high fives me. “That’s my brother.”

“It’s about fucking time. And the truth will set you free.” Axle concurs.

I look at him, and then at my brother, hesitating when I say.

...”Will it?”