Page 18 of Until the End (The Lost Letters #3)

Ginny

C arson’s eyes haven’t left me since he picked me up from my house. It feels like my skin is on fire in the best way. I have no idea what to do with myself, so I just keep refilling my cup with whatever cocktail Michael made and hope the feeling goes away.

Although I’m not sure I’ve thought this through. The more alcohol I drink, the more I want to jump Carson like a fish in heat…or whatever the saying is. My brain is too sloshy to remember.

“Guess who I caught holding hands,” Gia teases.

“Shhhh,” I admonish. It's just me, Lottie, and Gia at the table, but I'd rather not have our entire friend group overhearing our conversation. The guys are in the living room, playing a card game. “You didn't catch anything. We walked in front of you.”

“Who? When? What is happening?” Lottie asks.

I giggle. The three of us have had entirely too much to drink.

“Carson and Ginny have made things official,” Gia announces.

If my cheeks weren't already flushed from alcohol, they’d be beet red right now.

“Shut. Up,” Lottie says. “When did this happen?”

I send an annoyed look at Gia. “We haven't made anything official. Hell, we've barely even talked about it. All I know is that we’ve had some discussions, and I think we're going to give this a try.”

Lottie’s squeal gets the attention of the entire room.

“What are you girls gossiping about over there?” Carson asks. He raises an eyebrow at me, making it very clear he knows we're talking about him. Sometimes I want to smack that little smirk off his face, but mostly I just want to kiss it.

“Oh, nothing, just girl talk over here. You boys wouldn't be interested,” Gia says.

“I beg to differ,” Carson argues.

“Speak for yourself,” Michael grunts. “Whatever schemes they're concocting over there, I’d rather stay out of it.”

Gia scoffs. “You love when we scheme. It's the most fun you ever have.”

Michael rolls his eyes instead of engaging with her.

I tip my drink back only to find that it’s empty again. “Man, these are going down way too smoothly.”

“You want another one, Goose?” Carson asks, startling me when I realize he’s standing by my side. I didn’t even notice him move.

“Uh…” I hesitate.

“Yes, she wants another one,” Gia says. She’s always been the little devil on my shoulder, telling me to do naughty things. Carson snags my glass from my hand and heads into the kitchen to fill it up.

“I feel like I'm analyzing every interaction now,” Lottie whispers. “This is so exciting. How did this happen?”

Gia tells the story for me, and Lottie hangs on her every word. I interject when things get a little dramatic, but for the most part, Gia sticks to the truth. It reminds me that I still owe Carson a fashion show.

Nerves bounce around my body just thinking about it. I very rarely wear anything scandalous. Not even my touring costumes were all that risqué. But the idea of wearing those swimsuits in front of Carson makes my body overheat.

What's changed from a few years ago? I mean, I've always had a crush on Carson. I've always thought he was the best guy I knew, but I've never thought about him sexually.

Well, that’s not exactly true. But the one time I had dirty-Carson thoughts in high school, I couldn’t look him in the eye the next day. Maybe that’s why I didn’t have more. I couldn’t be around him if I thought about him like that.

I don't have a lot of experience. I've only slept with three guys. The first was a drunken one-night stand that I honestly did just to get it out of the way. I was hyping up the fact that I was a virgin in my head so much, it was annoying. So, I got drunk and took the first guy who piqued my interest home with me. That experience was lackluster, which wasn’t a surprise.

The second guy happened right before I got signed by Muse.

He and I dated for a little while, and as soon as we had sex, he stopped talking to me.

And then I met the Weasel. He was admittedly decent in bed.

I came more often than not, but there was always a subtle hint of disrespect when I was with Wesley.

I thought it was in my head, but looking back on all of the things that have happened, I know it wasn't.

Carson, on the other hand… I have no doubt he'll be an amazing lover. He's respectful, attentive, and singularly minded just on a daily basis. I can't imagine that those traits don't carry over into the bedroom.

“Okay, everyone. It's time to get a fresh drink and start playing Never Have I Ever,” Gia calls out .

“Oh, god, it's been so long since I've played this game,” I groan. I'm already past tipsy. Usually when we play this game, everybody likes to gang up on me because I have so little experience in everything.

And I end up drunk as a skunk.