Page 25 of Unlikable

I refuse to look at Felix and pretend he is air in front of me. “Where are we actually driving to?” I pointedly ask my brother.

“You’re not going to like it,” he says with a sigh. “When I asked the coachman where the other carriages left for, he said Canterbury was the destination and that he heard Father muttering something about setting the house on fire. That if they want to take the house away from him, he will make sure there is nothing left to take away. That no one should live in the place where Mother was happy.”

“What?” I slide the curtain aside to look outside. This is indeed the road we took when we drove here from Canterbury. “That will take seven hours! Surely Father won’t really drive that far to our house…” I shudder at the thought. “Why would he do such a thing?”

“Try to get your rest. It’ll be fine, sis.” Everett sounds like he is trying to convince himself rather than me.

I shrug. “How do you expect me to sleep peacefully when he is sitting here?”

We both look at Felix, who sheepishly watches us.

“I can sit with the coachman,” he suggests.

“Gladly,” Everett and I say in chorus.

Felix raises his eyebrows, clearly upset by our reply, as if he had not expected us to actually send him out of the carriage.

How naive of him.

He looks at us for a while, but when we say nothing more, he clears his throat and knocks on the wood behind him. Three times. A signal for the driver to stop.

We come to a halt. Felix steps out without looking at us, and not much later we get moving again.

“Where does he get the gall from?” murmurs Everett, looking over to where Felix was sitting just now. “The fool.”

Silently, I switch couches so that I sit directly opposite my brother in Felix’s old spot. The sofa is still warm. “Did you know about this? About our grandfather and the fact that there’s nothing wrong with our house?”

“Yes,” he responds somewhat uncertainly. “I knew that, but also only recently.”

I keep looking at him sternly, urging him with my silence to continue.

Everett runs a hand through his hair and seems to be searching for the right words. “Jonathan told me the day it thundered so much, when you were in the library working on the guest list for the banquet.”

“Just like that?”

He nods. “He and I…” He averts his gaze. “I don’t know what it is or what to call it.” He falls silent again for a moment, and I give him time to tell his story. After all, we have seven hours to cover. “He told me, just like that. At first I was angry. I started swearing at him. I said terrible things to him, things I still regret. I felt so betrayed, sister. It really felt like someone had pulled my heart out and stomped on it a few more times.”

“I do know that feeling, yes.”

He looks at me briefly and then gives me a small but sad smile. “However, I realised he would not confess something like that for nothing. He could also have kept his mouth shut, but apparently he thought or thinks I was important enough to tell me the truth. When I asked him why he told me about the plan, he replied that he could no longer handle lying to me.”

“Why didn’t you say anything to Father? To me?”

Everett looks straight at me now, and his face tightens. “Because…Because I was afraid we’d go back home and I’d never see him again.” He covers his face in his hands and starts to shake.

Immediately, I lean forward to close him in an embrace. It breaks my heart to see him like this, so vulnerable, so sad. I don’t continue to ask about the relationship between them. It is none of my business, and if he had wanted to talk about it, he would have done so long ago. He knows his secrets are safe with me, that he can tell me everything. I think he himself still has no idea what to do with the situation, what he really feels for Jonathan. What exactly is going on between them.

My brother is too important to me, and I understand him. It wouldn’t have mattered much if I had stayed at the banquet, even though Everett told me that Father was probably in trouble. The idea that I would no longer be around Felix was too painful.

And now he is at the front of the carriage, and I want to push him onto the road.

“It’s not his fault,” Everett says softly. “He can’t do anything about this. He could be evicted from the house for telling me this. He knew the risks, and yet…”

“No, it’s not his fault,” I comfort him. I slowly rub his head and press a kiss to his cheek. “This is no one’s fault. Except the Cliftons’.”

“Theodor is disturbed.” Everett detaches himself from my embrace and sits up straight again. His eyes are red, and his hair is slightly tangled by my touch. “If he staged all this purely to trick Father, then I am afraid of what he will do when he gets hold of Father now. He could also have just asked for financial support. Or for the house. Not that he would have got the house because we know how Father is.”

I let out a sigh. “I think he knows that too. Our house is sacred to Father.”

“Apparently so holy that he is going to offer it as a sacrifice to heaven by setting it on fire.”

I feel a knot forming in my stomach. “We won’t let that happen.”

“The fact that Theodor uses Father’s vulnerability about Mother against him sickens me.”

“Me too.”

We look at each other, and in that instant I feel a warmth I haven’t felt in a long time. A warmth like there was only at home, when Mother was alive and we were a close-knit family. Unbreakable.

We continue on our way in silence. Only the horses’ hooves and the creaking of the carriage can be heard. After a while, it starts raining, and it suddenly becomes chilly. By now we are riding through the forest, where it is already cooling down completely. I wrap my cloak a little closer around me against the cold. My breath makes clouds in the air.

Felix is sitting outside. It did not look like he was dressed for this weather.

Don’t think about him, Eleonora.

Meanwhile, the rain begins to intensify. The thick drops clatter like gunshots on the roof of the carriage. The wind is clearly audible, blowing ominously around us.

“Do you think he’ll be begging to come back in within the next two minutes?” Everett asks curiously.

I look at the empty spot next to me. “I can see him doing that, yes.”

But that doesn’t happen. Felix keeps a low profile, which makes me feel worse by the minute. The coachman was dressed for a rainy evening: a long coat, hat, scarf and gloves. Felix on the other hand…

Suddenly it feels like we are slipping. The back of the carriage jerks to the left while the horses keep going straight.

“Apologies, lords and lady!” the coachman shouts from outside. “The rain has caused the path to become muddy!”

“Careful!” Everett calls back. “If you must, you can drive slower, but we can’t afford to stop!”

“All right, sir!”

I begin to wonder if Felix is still sitting next to him, since normally he would have opened his mouth long ago. My doubts are answered when, after a few minutes, I hear a loud roar. A cry of distress.

At breakneck speed, we come to a halt. I collapse forward against my brother. My head slams into his, and I jerk back in agony.

“Are you all right, sis?” Everett groans.

For a few seconds, the world goes black. Fortunately, the pain disappears quickly. Only a faint pounding lingers. I groan in confirmation that I am fine. “You?” I manage to utter.

“I think so.”

Blinking my eyes to regain my clarity of vision, I see nothing strange about my brother. He seems to be fine.

Thank God.

“What was that?” he asks.

I pull the curtain aside to look through the window, but on my side I see only forest.

Outside, I hear another scream. It is Felix. Then it sounds as if someone jumps from the carriage and starts running.

“Sir!” cries the coachman. “Careful, it’s slippery!”

Everett and I exchange a glance.

“Stay here,” he says, and without waiting for my reply, he gets out and slams the door again.

My heart is racing like mad. I remain seated and prick my ears. However, the pounding in my head makes it difficult to concentrate. I wait a few seconds, no longer. Then the door opens again.

My brother’s face has turned white. “It’s Father and Mr Clifton. They’ve had an accident.”

That is all he has to say to make me get out. When my feet touch the soft ground, I immediately slip. I manage to grab onto one of the wheels just in time. That one is just as slippery and dirty, but I don’t care. I put one foot in front of the other as the raindrops blow in my face. It is coming down tremendously fast. I raise my arm to shield myself from the storm and continue my way through the mud.

Everett joins me, pressing me against his side and escorting me to our destination.

Once there, we are largely protected from the rain by closely grown trees from which the leaves have not yet fallen off. The first thing I see is how Felix is bent over his father’s body. Theodor Clifton is lying with his upper body in the mud. His legs are stuck beneath the carriage, which has fallen to the side. The horse attached to the carriage lies on the ground. It roars anxiously and tries to get up. Our coachman assists Felix and tries to lift the carriage off Theodor.

Adjacent to Theodor’s carriage is my father’s. The rear wheels are barely on the ground, while the front dangles dangerously above a cliff. The horse is nowhere to be seen. Neither is the driver.

“Dear Lord,” I hear myself say.

“Father!” Everett shouts above the deafening sound of the rain. He lets go of me, runs towards Father’s carriage and comes to a halt with a skidding motion. He looks around and seems to inspect the situation. “Father!”

A soft moan is heard. For a moment, I think I imagined it, but Everett seems to have heard it too, as he takes another step closer. As his hand clasps the door, there is an ominous creak and the vehicle slides a little further forward, towards the abyss.

Everett curses and stiffens in place.

I am about to burst into tears; I am so anxious. Yet I manage to calm myself down. I suck in a gulp of fresh air, rub my eyes and, seeing clearly again, move ahead. As I pass Felix and look back, I see Theodor’s coachman sitting limply by his carriage. His head is hanging on his chin. Felix starts shouting at his father, but Theodor seems unable to answer.

I stop walking because doubt sets in. Felix looks so lost. His voice breaks as he once again opens his mouth to shout a plea. His shoulders begin to shake; his clothes become soaked. He looks like a pile of nothing.

“Felix…” I say. Too softly. The rain drowns me out. I clear my throat and carefully, afraid my words will make this all final, I say his name again.

“Help me, Eleonora.” No shout. No command. He is begging me.

“Eleonora!” Everett shouts my name in a way I have never heard him say my name before. My blood turns to ice. My neck hairs stand straight up. As I turn around, I watch Father’s carriage begin to slide away slowly, but not slowly enough. The rain picks up even more. So heavy that it is almost impossible to see more than two metres ahead. The cold doesn’t help either; the drops feel like needles on my skin.

“Eleonora,” Felix repeated.

Two men are calling me. Two important people in my life need my help at the same time, and I can only be in one place at a time.

I tear my gaze away from the man I want to help with all my broken heart and rush towards my brother. Everett is hanging from the back of the carriage. He has grabbed the underside of the vehicle and is leaning backwards in an attempt to pull the thing back onto solid ground.

I stand next to him, put my heels in the mud and put my hands on the wooden beam Everett is pulling. I pull along, throwing my full weight into the fray and clamping my jaws together. A groan escapes my lips as I begin to realise that what we are doing makes no difference whatsoever.

Everett curses again and lets out a cry, then gives a tug on the wood. The carriage comes off a bit. A loud creak echoes through the forest.

Our coachman, who was trying to free Theodor, joins us. He comes running only a little too fast, causing him to slip and come to a stop against Everett, making all the hard work in vain.

Father’s carriage slips back into the abyss, even further than when we found it.

“Fool!” Everett roars in panic. “Now look what you’re doing!”

“I’m sorry, sir,” the man responds and takes a step back. He looks around helplessly.

“Felix!” I hear myself call out. I quickly look over my shoulder, but through the rain I can only see his silhouette, nothing more. “Please.”

He does not respond.

Panic takes hold of me. I feel the tears starting to win, the weak girl in me coming to the surface. I begin to lose my grip, feel myself sinking into fear.

“Don’t stand there staring like that,” Everett calls out to the coachman. “Do something!”

From the corner of my eye, I see the man walking around us, towards the front of the carriage. “I see him sitting there!” He takes another step closer to the door. “He’s alive!” Before Everett and I realise what he is up to, he pulls open the door.

The carriage sinks further forward. The man dangles from the door, which opens above the cliff. He lets out a chilling cry.

I feel myself being pulled forward. I try to push my heels further into the ground, but the earth has become too soft and liquid. I groan in fear as it begins to dawn on me that if Everett and I don’t let go now, we will plunge into the abyss with him.

Our coachman calls to us, starts floundering in an attempt to work himself up, making things worse.

I look straight into his panic-filled eyes as he loses his grip and plunges down.

“No!” I roar. “Everett, he’s…”

“I know,” my brother says in an unsteady voice.

“I don’t want to lose another parent.” I start crying really hard now. I can’t control myself anymore. I weep as I do my best to pull Father to safety. His life is literally in our hands, and we are losing grip.

Suddenly, the carriage comes back a bit in our direction. I look beside me, at my brother. To his right is Felix. He does not look at me and focuses on saving my father. The three of us pull and pull. We groan, scream and at the umpteenth shout, we miraculously manage to get Father’s carriage completely back on land in one pull.

The sudden force with which the vehicle shoots backwards causes all three of us to fall with our backs into the mud. Everett immediately gets up to walk to the precipice and peers down. He seems to see something and immediately averts his gaze. With quick steps, he walks back towards the carriage and crawls inside.

With great difficulty, I get up. My body is limp, exhausted. When I look back at Felix, who has also got up by now, he looks at me tensely. I nod at him weakly, that’s all that I can manage. He nods back briefly.

Then I walk over to my brother, who by now is helping Father out. Father has half-opened his eyes. His face is drained white and smeared with blood, a lot of blood. His left arm is around Everett’s neck, his other hanging in an unnatural position along his body.

I stumble towards them, gently press a kiss on Father’s temple and start crying again. Not loudly this time. Silent tears of relief.

My brother and I help Father into the carriage in which we had come. I take a seat next to Father, make him lie down, as far as is possible in the cramped space, and pull his head onto my lap. He groans in pain as I place his injured arm on his chest, preventing it from being swung in all directions during the ride.

“It will be all right, Father,” I whisper softly, trying to keep my voice as steady as possible. “I am with you.” I have to be strong now. I have to reassure him. Father’s healthy arm reaches up, trembling. I stare at his hand and grasp it. Then I look outside. I watch Everett pull the deceased coachman from the seat and free the horse, which immediately runs away into the forest, probably never to return.

Everett lugs the coachman’s body with him and walks to the back of our carriage, and then puts him in the trunk. He then walks back to Felix and lifts up Theodor’s carriage, allowing Felix to free his father.

Theodor, too, is placed in the trunk. As the lid falls back into place with a soft thump, the rain stops and we are flooded with nothing but silence.