Page 13 of Two Ruins Make a Right

“If you’ll pardon me...” Desperate to escape before she made a fool of herself with her tears, Nell fled down the steps.

In her present state of panic, she wasn’t fit to join Christa and Harry, who stood waiting in the vestibule of the entry.

She skirted a sharp right turn into a passageway at the bottom of the steps, then entered the first empty room she could find.

As quietly as possible, she closed the door and leaned against it.

She stared through the windows, seeing nothing as she desperately tried to regain her composure.

Her hands continued to shake even after she had wrapped them around her waist. Even her eyesight turned blurry.

When she blinked to clear the fuzziness, it dawned on her that she was crying.

A knock sounded on the door, and she quickly wiped her tears away. “A moment, please.” She straightened her gown and lifted her chin, then sniffed twice. “Come in.”

When the door opened, James entered with Valentina. He held her small hand in his. “My lady, we’ve come...” He stared at her face with his brow creased into neat rows.

The blasted man. Naturally, he would deduce that she’d been crying. She cleared her throat and then bent to talk to Valentina. She didn’t care if it seemed she was ignoring James. She didn’t want him to see how frightened she had become when his daughter tumbled down the stairs.

“That was quite a scare, Miss Valentina,” she said soothingly.

Unable to resist, Nell tucked a loose curl behind the girl’s ear.

It was as much for her benefit as Valentina’s.

Nell simply wanted—no, needed—to feel the child’s warmth, hoping it would ease her shakiness and steal the coldness that had descended from nowhere.

“Thank you, my lady, for catching me,” she murmured. Valentina looked to the floor and shuffled the toe of her half-boot. “I’m sorry. I should not have been running down the stairs.”

Nell didn’t care that James stood close and would see everything.

Without a second thought, she knelt and whisked the girl into her arms. The smell of sunshine and freshness greeted her.

Another onslaught of emotion threatened to erupt, so Nell closed her eyes tightly.

“No apology necessary. I’m happy you’re safe. ”

Valentina wriggled out of her arms to peer into Nell’s face. “Why are you crying? My papa didn’t cry.” She glanced up at her father. “Did you?”

Nell didn’t look, but she could sense that James was shaking his head.

Before she could think of something to say, he intervened gently.

“Darling, Lady Whitton is mightily relieved that you are safe and sound. That’s the reason for her tears, I’m sure.

” The rich, resonant sound vibrated in her chest when he chuckled slightly.

“I might not have shed a tear outwardly, but inside my heart was somersaulting as I watched you stumble on the stairs. I think I’ve aged ten years in ten minutes. ”

“As did I, my lord.” Nell grappled with a handkerchief in a hidden pocket of her walking gown. She quickly dried her tears, summoned her best face-forward look, then stood and faced James.

She needn’t worry if he was looking at her since all his attention was devoted to his daughter. “Poppet, why don’t you find Miss Owens?”

“But I thought I was coming with you?” Valentina’s plaintive tone signaled she had set her heart on accompanying them.

“Sweetheart, it will be a rather dull afternoon for your darling Abigail without you to tend to her.” Nell softened her voice. “If you stay here, I promise to come to the nursery when we return. We’ll have a tea party then.”

“Will you eat with me?” Valentina asked.

“Valentina, that’s enough,” her father growled softly.

“I’d love to, but only if your father agrees.” Nell forced her gaze to his. “If you don’t mind...I’d like to spend some time with Valentina when we return.”

“Huzzah,” the little one exclaimed. “See, Papa? I knew she was the one.” As if it were a foregone conclusion, Valentina skipped out of the room.

James shook his head at his daughter, then returned all his attention to Nell. The scrutiny in his eyes would be best described as if he’d discovered a new species on the planet never seen before.

“Shall we join the others?” Nell took a step toward the door.

James lifted his hand. “One moment, please.” He smiled slightly while never taking his eyes from her face. “Why were you so upset when we came in?”

“I...” A shallow breath escaped. How could she explain that in the short time she’d been in that darling girl’s company, she’d become attached?

She didn’t expect anything from James. There was no future in her past. James wasn’t a part of her future, and neither was Valentina.

However, she wanted to spend as much time as possible with the little girl before she left for Whitton Priory.

Nell would always remember her time with Valentina as a gift.

“I didn’t want to see your child hurt or suffering. That’s all.” She shrugged. “Shall we?”

Silence descended between them as he studied her. He turned and opened the door with a flourish. He waved his hand, motioning her to proceed him.

As she passed, he whispered to her with a deep silkiness in his voice, almost like a caress, until she heard the words. “A mere day ago, I might have believed this was a scheme you and Valentina devised together if I hadn’t seen her flying through the air.”

She whipped her gaze to meet his, ready to deny such a ridiculous assertion, but a bit of uncertainty clouded his eyes. It was best to hold her tongue and not engage in another argument.

“I know that’s not true. Frankly, now…” An endearing smile softened his face. “I’m unsure what to think. I’ve never had such vague or imprecise thoughts, or, should I say, feelings, when it comes to you.”

For a moment, she was uncertain whether he was jesting or revealing an aspect of his genuine self. But this was a chance for them to start anew. “I’m struggling with all of this myself.”

“I’m glad I’m not the only one.” His smile grew more intense, and an immediate warmth wrapped around her. If he continued to look at her like that, she would soon melt into a puddle of sentimentality.

She was courting danger.

Which made him dangerous—on so many indefinable levels.

By then, they were out in the hallway where Harry saw them. “Miss Ellison and I were about to launch a search party for you two.”

“Indeed,” Christa said with a smile in Harry’s direction.

Harry returned her adoring gaze before he turned to James and Nell. “The day is wasting, and there’s so much I want to show Lady Whitton.”

James escorted them outside, where two horse carts awaited them. “Harry, why don’t you escort Miss Ellison? Lady Whitton, will you accompany me?” The way James asked the question made it seem more like a foregone conclusion.

With an infectious grin, Harry nodded. Immediately, he assisted Christa into the first cart, and James did the same for Nell into the second cart.

“Won’t this be cozy?” James offered as he took the reins. They were off with a click of his tongue, following Harry and Christa.

For a moment, Nell felt a ridiculous sense of foreboding. It made sense to travel the estate in horse-drawn carts for ease of travel, but it gave Harry and Christa an opportunity for private conversation. “Do you think it wise for them to be together?”

When he chuckled, a shiver danced down her back. Immediately, goosebumps broke across her arms. She hadn’t heard that rich, resonant sound for eight years. She turned her gaze to his and smiled.

“The real question is whether it’s safe for us to be together without a chaperone.

” He leaned close. “In our misspent youth, we could always manage a way to straggle behind the others and discover all sorts of mischief. Remember? I see you haven’t changed.

Much like the mischief you found on the stairs with my daughter. ”

“James, you have me all wrong.” The hair on the back of her neck stood at attention. “My actions on the stairs weren’t a ploy to get in your good graces. I just acted on impulse.”

“But why?” he pressed. James halted the cart at a bend in the road, letting Harry and Christa to disappear from their sight. “Why do you enjoy spending time with her? You barely know her. Most think Valentina is the definition of a hoyden.”

A need to defend the little girl exploded within her chest, resulting in a heat that marched across her cheeks. “I’m privileged to spend time with her. She’s a delightful little girl.”

“Nell, come now. I live with her. I know my daughter can be trying at times,” he challenged.

She squirmed at the disbelief in the deep rumble of his voice.

“I don’t find her anything but charming.

When I’m with her, I can pretend she’s..

.” Instantly, she focused on the grove of gooseberry bushes on the other side.

How could she have let that slip? It was like handing ammunition to the enemy for your own demise.

She didn’t want anyone to know her true feelings of bereavement for not having a family of her own.

“She’s what?” he asked softly. “Tell me.”

She clenched her fists together, then turned his way. She’d learned too much in the past years. Namely, it hurt when your future didn’t turn out how you wanted. Not only that, but it was exhausting to hide your secrets.

“Nell?”

At his soft badgering, it was as if all her restraint disappeared in a whiff of smoke and her words tumbled free. “Because I can pretend she’s mine.”

Suddenly, all sound ceased as everything grew quiet. Even the birds, insects, and the breeze seemed to be still. Her eyes widened as the horror of her confession floated around them. Why had she shared that?

Because she was tired. Tired of not being true to herself.

His eyes sparked with awareness, then narrowed.

He could easily destroy her with a cutting barb or two. Valentina wasn’t hers and never would be.