Page 80 of True
"I don't want to. But I'm scared."
Tyler's eyes opened a little more, attentive but languid. "Do I scare you?"
"No. Not at all… But it's always like this in the beginning. I fall fast and then… I regret it."
Tyler said nothing, letting Alec process.
"It's just, I keep doing this to myself. Same circle… over and over. I just keep repeating, and it always ends the same. I know what you're thinking… it's not just post-sex guilt."
"That's not what I'm thinking at all."
Alec continued: "I mean, I'm at the end of a relationship and already here's another beginning."
Tyler grinned.
"I'm a serial monogamist. It's like I can't be alone. It's textbook."
"Slow down," Tyler said, reaching out and caressing Alec's jaw. Alec reflexively jerked, dismissing the move.
"Stop. I'm not a horse," Alec said. He rose to a sitting position. His hands were up, fluttering.
"My brain is spinning in my head—"
"I can tell," Tyler sat up, rising to his level.
"—You live here. I live in DC. My work is there. Yours is here. How would we make this
work? If we fall in love, how could this possibly work?"
They were facing each other now, naked and a little cold, the quilt discarded in the shuffle.
Tyler held his hands out. Alec rolled his eyes briefly, but Tyler remained statuesque, only gesturing toward his open palms with his eyes. Alec relented, placing his hands into the larger man's. Tyler squeezed them.
"You said,love." His inflection was not accusatory, nor was it a question, just purely observational.
"You see. I'm already moving too fast."
"Come here. It's freezing."
He released Alec's hands and raised the blanket, pulling him back under and encompassing him.
He rested his scruffy chin on Alec's shoulder. "Slow down," he whispered, massaging Alec's temples.
"We're two men, in a house… alone. I'm satisfied with that for right now. And you can be too. The future is not here. The future is later. So, we'll just take it one day at a time. And for now, let's just stay right where we are."
Alec focused on Tyler's soothing tone, his thoughts began to slow.
Tyler kissed the back of his neck, and Alec relaxed even deeper into the cuddle. He felt Tyler's
cock growing stiff against the warm flesh of his back.
"And then there's that," Tyler said.
"Now, I see what you're after. It was all a ploy to seduce me."
"Just human nature," he whispered. "Two men… exploring each other's bodies… discovering what feels good."
Alec leaned into him. "Sounds good… but I'm on top this time."
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