Page 78 of Trigger Discipline

Following the compass set in the stock of Judd’s rifle, they picked their way through the streets. It was bizarre to see some areas completely untouched. The building facades and surrounding landscape were in perfect condition, like it was just a sleepy weekend morning where the residents hadn’t yet stirred. Only to then turn a corner and step into a smoking crater where humanity had once thrived.

Then there were the bodies.

Blake had seen his fair share of dead bodies, and it was easy to gloss over the burned and dismembered ones. The bodies looked more like wreckage than anything else, and he could trick himself into believing that. No, the difficult ones were the whole ones. The people who were so untouched that they could be sleeping. They’d been killed by cast-off energy from the zappy balls or struck by flying debris. Their injuries weren’t as obvious, and they looked so human he couldn’t disassociate.

And he didn’t want to. Blake couldn’t explain it, but hefelt like he owed it to these people to acknowledge them. Like a penance for surviving. A toll to pay. And with every face he memorized, he understood Gabriel a little more. They were like a weight on his shoulder, and with every step he took that they didn’t, it got a little harder. The guilt turned to lead on his shoulders, weighing him down. It was no wonder Gabriel had once found relief at the bottom of a bottle.

After forty minutes or so, Judd led them into a burnt-out corner store. They crunched over broken glass gingerly, trying to keep quiet as they made their way to the back. Blake helped Phin slide to the floor, his eyes squeezed shut and jaw working. Once he’d settled, Blake stood up and rubbed his shoulder. It ached from Phin’s weight, but his entire body ached, so it wasn’t much of a difference.

Sighing, he turned to look around the store. It smelled like burned…everything. Rubber, wood, even hair. It stuck in the back of his throat and made breathing painful. Whatever color the linoleum had been was now ashy black, melted and streaked with their footprints. Parts of the ceiling had collapsed, and periodically bits of insulation floated down on them like snow.

Picking his way through, Blake began looking for anything that wasn’t crispy. The plastic bottles of drink had melted in their case, leaving behind a congealed mess reminiscent of Chernobyl.

One section of the store, closest to the brick outer wall, was relatively unscathed. Blake picked through until he found a couple of sleeves of powdered donuts. The wrapping was dark with soot, but when he ripped them open the donuts looked perfect.

Rejoining the group, he handed them out. “Keep your sugar up.”

Judd made a face. “This will totally ruin my macros.”

No one had the energy to politely laugh at his terrible attempt at levity. Before biting into his donuts, Blake checkedVictoria’s leg, making sure her pedal pulse was still strong. He had no idea the state of her injury. His biggest fear was that the fracture would shift and cut off blood supply or worse, sever something.

Her pulse was still strong, and her capillary refill was good. It was the first bit of luck they’d managed.

When he stood up, Gabriel was there offering him some water. They’d taken every water bottle in the apartment, but they wouldn’t last. Blake only took a few sips before handing it back.

“Drink more,” Gabriel pushed.

He still had his helmet on, but he’d undone the strap, letting it dangle against his neck. Blake watched it, fixated on the way it brushed against Gabriel’s stubble. He could still feel it brushing against his skin, scraping it raw. It had been good, and Blake wanted it again. He wanted more. He wanted to get out of this hellhole and spend hours and hours letting Gabriel brush his dark stubble against every inch of his body.

Pushing aside his horny thoughts, he jutted his chin. “Is that an order?”

Gabriel raised an eyebrow before bringing the water bottle to his mouth. It clacked against his teeth as he poured it into his mouth. Lowering the bottle, he stepped forward, and before Blake could say anything, he was tugged close and kissed.

Like a Pavlovian reflex, Blake went limp in Gabriel’s strong hold. His mouth parted to kiss him deeper, only to be flooded with water. Jolting in surprise, he tried to pull back, but Gabriel kissed him hard, hands digging into his hair to hold him tight. Blake swallowed, a dribble of water slipping past his lips to run down his neck.

Gabriel kissed him once more before stepping back, leaving Blake to find his balance on wobbly knees.

“Good boy.”

Then he was gone, somehow managing to swagger under all his gear as he went to double-check the map with Judd. Blake was left floundering,definitelynotstaring at his ass, and wondering what the hell just happened to him.

“Good to know you swallow,” Tommy snickered from behind him.

Blake snagged one of his donuts and blew the powder all over his face, leaving Tommy with white lashes and a wrinkled nose.

They rested for a few more minutes before beginning to get themselves together.

“You know,” Judd said conversationally, like they weren’t in a burnt-out convenience store in the middle of an alien battleground. “We need a team name.”

Blake helped Phin up. He had to use both hands and plant his feet to lean all his weight back to lift him. “We’re not a team. We’re anaccident.”

“We’ve been shot at, blown up, melted, and through the magical power of friendship, we’ve survived. That’s a team.”

Victoria sucked her teeth. “You’re an idiot.”

“I’m the heart of this team.”

“You’re the hemorrhoid of this team,” Phin muttered, gingerly putting some weight on his foot.