CHAPTER THIRTY-NINE

COLLINS

“R emember when Collins was sitting in that very seat, claiming number twenty-nine wasn’t her type?” Jenna looks at Kendra as we sit in the family box, watching the Blades crush the Carolina Chiefs.

“I do indeed, Jenna.” Kendra taps her chin in thought, mocking me. “I distinctly remember her claiming she’d learned all about Sawyer being a single dad from a magazine interview he had given.” She narrows her eyes in my direction. “Do you recall that bullshit tale, Collins?”

I roll my eyes and pop a red jelly bean into my mouth. I do, in fact, recall what I said, and it was, in fact, bullshit. Last season and not all that long after I met Sawyer for the first time, I found myself running a Google search on him, keen to find out more about the Blades captain who had effectively offered me a booty call.

It seems crazy to me to think how long I suppressed my feelings and attraction toward him.

“And now she’s wearing his jersey with Bryce stamped across her back, and she’s likely thinking about how much she loves him,” Darcy joins in, giggling with the other two.

I pop another jelly bean into my mouth. “Remind me, when is your flight back to London?”

Darcy snorts softly, releasing a forlorn sigh. “Tomorrow morning. Then it’s the final countdown before I’m back and moving into my new apartment!”

Kendra imitates a chef’s kiss.

“It’s so pretty, and I’m so glad I found something in the end,” Darcy continues. “I just want to move in now and leave Oxford behind. I’ve had enough of boring British weather and crappy exes.”

“Is Liam still giving you shit?” I ask, annoyed on Darcy’s behalf.

“Yep. Apparently, he’s started seeing the girl he cheated on me with, but who knows? Half the time, I think he just says things for effect and to try and make me jealous.”

Kendra grumbles, holding out her tray of corn chips for Darcy to take one. “You should tell Jack what he’s doing. He has experience dealing with toxic exes.”

She isn’t lying; Kendra’s ex-boyfriend, Tyler, can vouch for that.

“Jack is already way too protective, and I’m going to need him to cool it when I move stateside. I’m a big girl, and I can look after myself,” Darcy confirms, eyes drifting out onto the ice. “When he found out about Liam cheating, he DM’d him a dick emoji.”

I almost choke on my jelly bean. That boy is fucking hilarious.

Kendra bursts out laughing, shaking her head as she looks down at the red ruby on her left hand. “We have officially entered the year we get married, and August cannot come soon enough,” she croons with heart eyes.

Reaching over, her mother-in-law-to-be, Felicity, runs a smooth palm across Kendra’s shoulder. “Not that you aren’t already, but I cannot wait for you to officially become a Morgan. My son is one very lucky boy.”

Thoughts of marriage have my mind drifting back to Sawyer and the name I have across my back.

Could I see myself married to him one day? The thought doesn’t scare me. All I feel are the familiar shots of excitement when I think about anything to do with Sawyer and Ezra.

I look down at the red jelly beans strewn across the table next to me. It’s the first game in a while where Ezra hasn’t tagged along, instead asking if he could stay over at Nate’s place again since it’s a weekend.

Sawyer was initially hesitant since some of the friends sleeping over are several years older, but I convinced him to go with it. After all, making friends and spreading his wings are what he wanted for Ezra.

It’s what I want for him too.

“I think Lee and I might break up.”

Jenna’s statement tears me from my daydream, and we all dart our heads in her direction. She nods hers in response to our shocked faces. “It feels like the spark has fizzled out. Sure, I get that the longer you date someone, the more excitement gives way to a comforting feeling when you’re around each other. I just can’t see a future with him, and I get the feeling he feels the same.”

She sounds dejected, and my heart breaks for her. I remember last year when their relationship was fresh and exciting, she had high hopes that Lee was the one .

“Best to break it off if you aren’t feeling it any longer. Trust me, it’s all downhill from there!” Darcy confirms.

“Maybe an American boy will steal my girl’s heart, eh? Melt away some of the cynical ice,” Felicity adds hopefully.

Like that’s the most ludicrous notion, Darcy scoffs, waving her off. “You have to be kidding me. A little fun? Absolutely. As I say, I’ve heard the rumors about American men between the sheets.” She winks, and Felicity frowns at the thought. “But like hell am I getting serious with anyone anytime soon. If ever again, to be honest.”

When Darcy looks back out onto the ice, the rest of us turn to Jenna.

“She’s right though, Babe. Remember what you said to me about Tyler? You deserve better than to be in an unhappy relationship.”

She nods weakly, smoothing out her dark hair. “I’m going to give it a couple more weeks and see how it goes. I don’t want to make any knee-jerk decisions.”

“That’s wise,” Kendra agrees. “But don’t hold onto something if it doesn’t feel right.”

Jenna leans back in her chair, a smile tracing her lips. “In better news though, my brother just got reselected for Team USA, so he’ll be traveling home more for games, et cetera.”

I pick up my Diet Coke, bringing the straw to my mouth. “Now, rugby thighs? That’s a concept I can get on board with. Let me know when your brother is back home, and I’ll be sure to go support a game.”

Kendra swats me on the thigh. “Disgraceful behavior. You’re a taken woman now.”

I shrug, smiling around my straw. “Just because I have a man in my bed doesn’t mean I don’t have eyes. And best believe those babies will be firmly planted on tight rugby asses. Nothing compares, trust me.”

“Mmhmm,” Darcy agrees. “Take it from a British girl who has been surrounded by them for years at college. Those thighs are unique, and I just want to feel them.” She reaches out to nothing, smoothing her palm down in front of her.

“Oh, hell yes, Jack!” Felicity punches the air. “That’s my boy! I knew he’d be amazing. I knew he would kill it in this league.” She steps behind Darcy and rests her hands on her shoulders, squeezing them gently in her palms while her daughter watches Jack fist-bump the guys on the bench. “I’m proud of you both, and I can’t wait to have you back with me. It’s been too long, Honey.”

Darcy tips her head over her shoulder, covering one of her mom’s hands with hers. It’s a sweet moment that has me thinking about my own mom and how I wish she were still around. Living life from a young age without her was tough, and sometimes, I catch myself wondering how different it would’ve looked if that truck driver had been more interested in the road and not his playlist. Still, wishing for things to be different doesn’t change anything. I can only control my future.

I watch as Sawyer knocks helmets with Jack. That goal just sent them four up in the third, making a home win within touching distance.

“Jon has worked wonders with this team.” Kendra looks over at the Jumbotron as Coach Morgan, dressed in a black suit and high-fiving his players, lights up the screen. “The team dynamics are perfect. They’re unrecognizable from previous seasons.”

The camera pans to Sawyer as he continues talking with Jack. At Christmas, when Sawyer talked about stepping down as captain, I knew he only had one person on his mind as his successor. Part of me thinks he’s holding on to the C to buy Jack a little more time in the league.

“Any luck with the job hunt, Collins?” Felicity turns to me as the game restarts, only a minute left on the countdown.

I shake my head. Nearly a week of searching, and nothing suitable has turned up. “Ed offered me some hours in Rise Up, and I’m thinking of taking that for a while. I’ll probably have to concede and get a job at a regular garage that doesn’t specialize in Harleys.”

Kendra’s brows knit together. “But they’re your passion and expertise. There has to be something around.”

I offer her a defeated shrug. “Trust me when I say, I’ve been scouring the internet for opportunities. I even called a couple of garages to ask if they’d be interested in taking on a Harley specialist. They weren’t.”

“Well, they’re just plain stupid then,” Jenna grumbles. “They don’t know what they’re missing.”

“They’re missing a badly behaved employee who can’t hold down a job to save her life.” I snort. “No one wants the wild child, and most garages take one look at a woman and think she’s clueless.”

“Nope.” Kendra speaks up. “That award goes to Cameron.”

“Hell yes, it does.” I reach across and high-five her, just as my cell starts vibrating in my jeans pocket.

The buzzer goes off, and the home crowd explodes into cheers, celebrating a big win against a strong team, but I can’t hear anything as I put the phone to my ear.

“Hello? Ezra?”

“Collins, I-I need your help.”

I can’t be sure that’s what he says as I push past our chairs and out into a quiet hallway, my heart thumping behind my ribs, hand gripping my phone tightly.

“What’s the matter?” I ask, voice shaking.

I can hear voices in the background and outside noise and then, to my horror, a siren.

“Please don’t tell Dad.” His small voice sounds wobblier than mine, and my heart breaks.

“Tell me you are okay. What happened?” I ask, just as Kendra pushes through the door to the hallway, concern etched across her face.

Ezra doesn’t respond, and other than background noise, the only voices I can hear are those in my head, telling me something is very wrong.

“Hello? Is this Ezra’s mom?” an unfamiliar female voice says.

“Yes.” I look over at Kendra, eyes wide at my own response.

Did I just say that out loud?

“I’m one of the EMTs called to the scene. Your son has been involved in a traffic accident involving a motorcycle and a car. Everyone is okay since it wasn’t at a high speed, but we will be transferring him to the hospital for a checkup. Only light injuries were sustained.”

“I-injuries?” I repeat, blood draining from my face.

Kendra rushes over, keeping me steady as I fight to stay upright.

“Yes, ma’am. As I said, everyone is okay, but we do need to make sure what we are seeing is only superficial and there isn’t anything more serious internally.”

My palms sweat, and my heart rate is at an all-time high. I begin to tremble from the adrenaline as it pumps through every part of my body.

“His dad just finished a hockey game, but give me the name of the hospital, and we will be there immediately.”

As the EMT reads out the details, I open my Notes app and type in the name, pulling it back off loudspeaker. She says something else, but I don’t hear it. I’m spinning out, sinking panic taking ahold of the very depths of my gut.

This is my fault .

I knew he had ridden on that motorcycle, and this is on me. He wouldn’t be in danger, and he wouldn’t be heading to the ER right now if I hadn’t fueled his passion and convinced Sawyer when he raised his initial doubts about the safety of bikes.

“Collins?” Kendra speaks as I disconnect the call and stare blindly at the Blades logo stamped on the wall in front of me. “What happened to Ezra?”

I feel the first tear as it hits my cheek, initially warm but turning cold as it runs a track toward my chin. “We have to find Sawyer. Now.”