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CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

COLLINS

“A nd what I want is you.”

Over and over, Sawyer’s demand replays in my head while my body melts into his, screaming the answer I desperately want to give.

I want this. I want him.

My limbs begin to tremble, the weight of my answer bearing down on us both.

If I sleep with him, will it be as more than just a fuck buddy? Or is he truly giving me a no-strings arrangement?

I open my mouth to answer and then hesitate.

“I’m so confused,” I whisper.

Hands still framing his cheeks, he covers them with his own and presses our palms into the sides of his face, eyes dark with more than just lust. “What’s got you confused, Baby Girl? Tell me what’s going on in that pretty head of yours.”

The nickname licks through my body in a delicious wave, making me pool with need. I hate nicknames—always have. Mike used to call me Honey, and it never sounded natural, coming from him. But the way Sawyer calls me Baby Girl? I’m trembling all over again.

“You,” I breathe. “You’ve got me all twisted up. Well, you and your son, to be exact. What are you doing to me?”

He just smiles, one that reaches his ears and sparkles in his eyes. “Some say my boy and I are the Dream Team.”

I close my eyes and swallow thickly. “I want you so badly.”

“How, Collins? How do you want me? Are we talking just my cock or more?”

I squeeze my eyes tighter.

“Open for me, Baby. Open.” His voice is soothing and persuasive.

Although persuasion is not what I need.

Courage.

That’s what I am searching for. An emotion I’ve never been short of, although it’s deserted me right now as I step into unknown territory.

When I crack an eye open, his handsome face stares straight back at me, brushing his thumbs over mine.

“Attagirl,” he croons. “So fucking beautiful.”

I pull a hand from underneath his, and it falls to the waistband of his black dress pants, his white button-down shirt casually tucked into them.

His eyes drop to where I’m fiddling with his black belt, trying to unloop it, and he smirks. “You want my cock, Collins?”

I nod once. “Yes.”

With his belt unfastened and hanging open, I begin working on the button and then his zipper.

Sawyer looks off to his left and down the dark hallway. At the top, people are entering and leaving the restrooms.

“I can’t fuck you here.”

I drop my head into the crook of his neck, releasing a soft moan. “Then take me home with you, like you want to.”

His forefinger finds my chin, lifting my head back up to face him. “I need to know where I stand. Before I push inside you, I have to know where my head should be. If it’s just sex, then I need to disconnect and fuck you.” He draws his bottom lip between his teeth, biting hard. “But if it’s more than that …”

His eyes fall to my lips, and memories of the kiss we shared at the Botanic Garden cause me to throb all over.

“But if it’s more than that,” he repeats softly, hopefully, “then I want to feel it all. I want to be all in and put my trust in you not to break me the first chance you get to leave town.”

The past few weeks pass before me like a slideshow. Sawyer and me outside of Rise Up. He and Ezra arriving at my garage, Ezra helping me detail my bike, then riding through the streets of Brooklyn together, Ezra giggling behind me. Sawyer asking me at the bar to come home with him, turning up at my apartment and asking me for a date. Me sitting next to him on the bench while we exchanged pieces of our past before we shared the best kiss I’d ever had. Sawyer telling me he couldn’t just be fuck buddies. Me tucking jelly beans into Ezra’s jacket pocket. It’s all there, clear as day. Begging me to take a leap and start dating this man for real.

“Can you do something for me?” I ask, twisting the end of his belt around my hand.

He drops his lips to my jaw and kisses me twice. “Anything.”

“Show me what it would be like if I said it was more than just a fuck.”

We don’t say goodbye to anyone as Sawyer takes me by the hand and leads me out of Lloyd’s and into the November Brooklyn night. His belt is barely fastened as we race for the exit.

As we cross the street and head for the parking lot he guided me to several weeks back, I feel a very different set of emotions.

I’m nervous.

I know my hand is trembling slightly, but I fight to keep my persona confident. I asked him to show me what it would be like if I was beneath him as his girl because I can’t curb my curiosity any longer.

I said no to him more times than I’d wanted, and tonight, I have to crack the door open and take a glimpse at what “more” with Sawyer Bryce would look like. And I don’t take this lightly, not for me, Sawyer, and especially not for Ezra.

Swinging the passenger door open to his black Lamborghini, I duck under his corded arm to get in, but a palm wraps around my wrist, spinning me back to face him.

“To be absolutely clear, if you get into my car and come home with me tonight, I’m not holding back, Collins. With your body, your mind, or in my own head. I’m giving you everything.”

I step toward him, not feeling the cold in only my T-shirt since we didn’t even head to the booth to collect my jacket or bag. Kendra will figure out that I left and take them home with her.

“That’s what I’m hoping for,” I whisper into the silent lot.

Sawyer closes his eyes, hand tightening on the doorframe. “Actually, I don’t think I can wait to get you in my bed.”

Lust takes over any nerves. “Tell me what you want me to do.”

He tips his chin at the black leather passenger seat. “Sit on there and face me.”

He releases my wrist, and I do as he commands. Dominant Sawyer is everything.

“What now?” I ask.

He runs a palm across the scruff of his jaw before glancing quickly over his shoulder, checking to see who’s around.

We’re all alone.

Standing right in front of me, he slowly drops to his knees, hands finding the inside of my thighs, spreading me wide.

“Rest your foot on here.” He taps the door sill with his hand. “I need you open for me, Baby Girl.”

“But I haven’t even?—”

A loud rip echoes in the lot, bouncing off the concrete pillar walls separating the spaces.

“You just ripped my leggings?!” I exclaim. “That’s …”

On his knees in front of me, Sawyer waits for me to finish my sentence.

But I don’t speak, and when he tears the seam even wider, material hanging loosely around my thighs, I don’t feel any of the cold, only the heat from my desperate pussy.

“You’re already so wet, coating my knuckles, Collins.” He brings the back of one hand to his mouth and licks me off him. “And so fucking sweet.”

When he edges closer to me, I lean back on my elbows, thankful I’m petite enough to fit across the bucket seat.

The sound of him licking me from his hand drives me forward. I want his mouth on me.

“Tear my thong too,” I command. “Tear it clean off my cunt and eat me.”

Both hands grip my flimsy black thong, his eyes on me and lips shining from my release.

“It’s been way too long since I saw this pretty pussy.”

In one slow ripping motion, Sawyer pulls it apart, his tattooed forearms straining deliciously.

I’m totally exposed as I run my feet wider and sit up a little more.

“Eat,” I command, taking some of the power back.

Sawyer buries his face between my thighs, swiping his tongue through my pussy, from my asshole to my clit, circling it twice. Then he sucks it into his mouth, and I clamp my knees around his head, taking my weight onto one elbow and thrusting my hand through his tousled hair.

“Yes,” I pant. “Right—fucking—there.”

He sucks me harder and faster, and I grow wetter, feeling my release flow into his mouth. I’m not coming yet, but I’m close. The strokes of his tongue are determined and perfectly placed.

I push his head into me further, wanting more, and with a whimper, he gives it to me, entering me with his tongue.

“Fuck me. Fuck me with your tongue,” I shout.

He pulls back, and I open my thighs.

“Get on my hood.”

“W-what?”

“You heard me,” he groans against my pussy. “Get on my hood.”

“But I’m so cl?—”

He cuts me off when his hands circle my thighs, lifting me off the seat and carrying me to the hood of his car before setting me down. “I can fuck you better with my cock.”

“But—”

“Don’t argue with me, Collins.” He unzips his pants and pulls his belt open. Sinking his fingertips into the tops of my legs, he pulls me to him. His face softens as he pushes his boxers down, and his angry, hard cock springs free. “I’m showing you what it’s like to be my girl and exactly how you would be treated.” He notches himself at my entrance, wrapping my legs around his waist. His tip pushes in, and he stops, eyes on mine.

“I’m still on birth control, so do it. Give me everything,” I bite.

In a single thrust, he slams into me, filling my pussy full.

“Oh fuuuuuck,” he moans, hips pulling away and pistoning back in.

“Is that all you have?” I goad, offering him a bratty smirk.

One hand wraps around my throat, fire burning bright in his green irises. “Oh, Collins, you haven’t seen anything yet. I’m gonna fuck you so good on the hood of my car.”

Thrust.

“Then …”

Thrust.

“I’m going to throw you around my bedroom all damn night.”

Thrust.

My jaw hangs open at the way he plows into me—without mercy but still with expert precision. Tonight, this man is definitely not a six out of ten.

“I prefer to be tied up, edged, and whipped.” My confession hangs between us as Sawyer stills his hips.

“What was that?” A devilish smirk spreads across his face.

I reach forward and palm his ass, pistoning him into me. “I said, I like to be tied up, edged, and whipped.”

He fucks me, and I release all over his dick.

Sawyer drops his head to see where we’re joined, watching me come hard—not only from the way he just fucked me in a public place on the hood of his car, but at the thought of living out my kinks with him.

“Dirty. Fucking. Girl,” he moans, capturing my mouth with his. “Does my girl have kinks?”

I gush all over him again, and he slams into me, my grip on his ass tightening.

“I like to be played with in bed. Tease me, and I’ll see fucking stars. Play with my senses too.”

On a guttural groan that has me crying out his name, Sawyer spills inside me, face falling to the crook of my neck and a gentle whimper leaving his throat.

A good few beats of silence pass before our breathing jointly evens out, and he picks his head back up to look at me, his large palm wrapping around the back of my head, fingers toying with my hair.

“That has to be at least an eight, right?” he asks hopefully.

A giggle bubbles out of me. It’s sweet and a complete juxtaposition to the filthy words we shared a few seconds ago. My hand moves from his ass to a button on the collar of his shirt, opening it and giving me a better view of his tattooed chest and pierced nipple that I love to play with.

“You fucked me so good, Baby,” I praise.

His dick twitches inside me, and he pulls out, tucking himself back into his pants, leaving me agonizingly empty.

“Let me get you back to my place before I fuck you here again.” He runs his hands over my arms. “It’s freezing, and I need you warm and under my sheets.”

I go to push off his hood, but he cups my face in his palm.

“Collins.”

“Yeah?”

Sawyer blows out a breath. “Is it okay for me to think of you as mine yet? Or do you need more time?”

I pause for a brief second, possibly too long for him, as he speaks again. “It’s fine. I can wait a little longer.”

Leaning forward, I place a chaste kiss across his lips. It’s the first time I’ve initiated a kiss between us, and I sense the relief as it washes through him.

“I don’t know. But I can tell you this,” I say softly, heart beating in my ears. “My place might be on a monthly contract, but I have absolutely zero intention of leaving. Right now, I want to be around you and your amazing boy.”