Page 103 of Too Old for This

Sheila clucks her tongue. “Bling isn’t just for nighttime anymore. You’re showing your age.”

“My age always shows. Nothing I can do about that.”

“It’s her wedding,” I say. “And unlike Archie, it’s her first. She can wear whatever dress she wants.”

“I understand, but that’s why she needs so much guidance,” Sheila says. “Women like Morgan are the reason why we have wedding consultants and planners. You can’t just let brides run around out there in the wild. They don’t know what the hell they’re doing.”

I have to give her that one. Not only has Morgan taken on this whole project by herself, but she seems to be making all the decisions.

“She has picked out a lovely venue. It’s that huge mansion out by the creek,” I say. “And her menu looks quite tasty, though I did steer her away from too much seafood. The reception is in the garden, and you don’t want fish sitting outdoors for too long.”

“That’s exactly what I’m talking about,” Sheila says. “Brides need to be steered.”

“Guided,” Bonnie says.

“Exactly.”

Bonnie is the first to leave. Sheila and I are alone, and I continue talking about the wedding to keep her from getting off topic. She does it anyway. Sometimes it’s aggravating how good her memory is.

“Did you ever figure out who that woman was? Norma?”

“Yes!” I say. “I totally forgot about that. Her name wasn’t Norma. That wasMaura. We worked together…Oh gosh, it was forever ago.Eons.”

“Really? I could’ve sworn she said Norma.”

“Well, I talked to her. It was Maura. She was here for a few days, trying to decide if she wants to move full-time. Still hasn’t decided.”

Before Sheila can say another word, Glenda interrupts us. I see her teeth coming first, followed by her floral dress. She makes a point of wearing her best frocks on Sunday, most of the time with a matching hat. Glenda looks me up and down. She has done that since I stopped dressing up, but her smile never wavers.

“You look so fresh this morning,” she says to me. “Did you go to the spa and get that antiaging facial? I’ve heard it’s incredible.”

“Yes, in fact I did.”

She smiles. As she goes on and on about this week’s raffle prize, I imagine hitting those white teeth with my hammer, and I wonder what kind of sound that would make.

I snap out of it soon enough. As much as I would like to enjoy this daydream, my schedule won’t let me. I have to get home. Time to give Burke another little show.

Again, I put on my bathrobe and shuffle through the sitting room, pausing to mutter at myself a few times before lying down on the couch. I meant to just rest my eyes for a minute but ended up falling asleep. When I wake up, I shuffle back to the kitchen, ditch the walker, and eat a very late lunch.

It feels like this should be more difficult.

Then again, Burke is older than I am. How much could he possibly understand at this point?

CHAPTER 56

My life is in a strange place. At any given moment, I have to think about who I am.

The everyday Lottie, who uses a cane and no longer dresses up? The confused, weak Lottie, who uses a walker and wears a nightgown all day? Or Norma, who wears the same jacket and hat every day and doesn’t need help walking?

It feels like I’ve taken on too much, but I didn’t have a choice. The key is to stop, think, and make sure all three of these personalities are kept separate.

I put on loose clothes, cover up with Norma’s jacket, and drive over to the Harmony. Late on a Sunday, the lot is almost empty. Not that it matters. My car is too old to have GPS, I don’t have my real phone with me, and no one could prove I was ever here.

Norma’s car is in the back lot. I’ve moved it a couple times, driven it down to the store or a restaurant, so it doesn’t look abandoned. I put on a pair of latex gloves before going inside, just as I always do.

The room is clean; housekeeping has already been here and done their job. But before I can grab the edge of the comforter and pull it down, I see it.

The hotel phone is blinking.