Page 20 of The Wolf’s Secret Baby

Typhon

“We need to get back in there. We need to stop this!” Kull said in a hushed whisper as soon as we were out of earshot of the outpost. His words rang in my mind, but they sounded distant. I was still trying to make sense of everything we had just seen. Words clotted under my tongue and my throat constricted. My chest was tight, and it felt as though I was about to collapse. Kull spoke again but his words were getting farther away with every breath, and I couldn’t concentrate on them. They were muted sounds, blurry and indistinct, just like the world itself. There was a spike of pain in my mind, as though something was drilling right into the center of my brain.

It was only when Kull grabbed me by the shoulders that my senses were focused. He looked me right in the eye.

“How can you be silent at a time like this? How can you walk away when they are torturing our brothers like that? Do you know what this means?” he asked in a strained voice. I pulled away from him and turned, before vomiting up the contents of my stomach. I bent over and clutched my sides until I spat everything out. I groaned and put my hand to my head. I closed my eyes, wishing that the world would open up and swallow me whole. Kull was pacing around me. I could feel myself trembling with anger. It roiled within me until it came out in a huge burst of anguish. I threw my head back and screamed loudly. It was so hard it made my throat raw.

When I was finished, I turned to Kull and growled at him. “I know,” were the only two words I said and then I began stomping away.

“You know? You know what?”

“I know this is wrong. I know this shouldn’t be happening. I know that Vance is never going to treat us with respect. You were right. I have been a fool,” I said, my mind cracking, splintering into sharp shards, each one of which caused me immense pain. I wanted to fight something. I wanted to explode with anger. I wanted to break the world.

We marched back to Ambrosia and the others. Everything inside me was taut. It was as though a storm had taken hold and the full fury of it was tearing me apart. I think Ambrosia could sense that something had gone very wrong from the anger that radiated from me.

“What did you find? What kind of weapon is Vance making?” Vali asked.

“Are you alright? We heard the scream…” Ambrosia said, rushing up to us.

“It’s not just a weapon. Not a single weapon. There are hundreds of them, perhaps thousands. And they’re just like us. They’re breeding more and more soldiers. Mindless soldiers, wolves that are going to be sent into battle again and again until they’re worn out. They’re born to die. That’s the best they can hope for. Once they’ve matured, they’re going to form a huge army that is going to swarm over the world,” the words rolled out of me, tasting bilious.

“That’s what they’ve been doing… these outposts have been breeding stations. And you’re sure about this?” Vali asked.

Kull nodded. “We saw them with our own eyes. They don’t seem aware of their surroundings yet. They’re being matured into adults so they can be sent into battle as soon as they’re ready. This is what Vance has been planning all along. All these years… it never stopped…” he trailed away.

I felt my stomach churning again. I groaned and turned away from the others. I beat my fist against a tree, not caring about the impact of pain that reverberated up my arm. My eyes were clamped shut and uneasy feelings stormed through me. Tension coiled around my skull, as though it was being squeezed and it was only a matter of time until my head popped but then I felt a hand on my shoulder. It was Ambrosia. Her presence helped to calm me. She slipped her hand into mine and pulled me away to a small glade where we could be alone. She wrapped her arms around me and hugged me. The warmth of her body was comforting. I dipped my head and buried myself in the crook of her neck, breathing in her scent. She rubbed my back. Strands of hair tickled my lips.

“It’s okay, Typhon. I know this is hard but it’s going to be okay.”

“No it’s not,” I snapped, pulling away from her. “It’s never going to be okay. I thought this was all over. I thought it ended with us. We were the experiments that went wrong, and we have suffered for it our entire lives. We have been mocked and ridiculed and taunted, treated as though we are unworthy of any attention. The experiment was a failure and that was the end of it. But now… now we learn that it was only the beginning. This experiment has been tried again and this time they have succeeded in breeding soldiers that meet their expectations. They are going to send all of these people into battle with the mission to die. They are still wolves, but they are seen as lesser. It’s not right. Surely, they still have something in here,” I jabbed my fingers between my ribs.

“Perhaps they do. I believe everything that lives has a soul. How does this make you feel about Vance?”

“It makes me want to kill him,” I snarled. I began pacing back and forth because it was the only way to cope with my anger. “You were right. After all this time I still thought that I could find a way to make him proud. I thought that if I just did something impressive then he would lift us up and have us stand beside him but now I can see that it’s never going to happen. After all we have endured, after the way he has treated us… making it seem as though it’s our fault for being different… he would really condemn other wolves to this fate? He treats Kull and I as though we are failures and yet he does not recognize the role he played in our lives.”

“Your failure, if you want to call it that, reflects on him and the rest of the pack more than anything. If they had given you a better upbringing and treated you as one of them; then perhaps things would have been different. If they had just accepted you…”

“But they didn’t and they’re not going to accept these wolves either. I can see now that Vance doesn’t care about anything other than his own legacy. He is willing to create life only to destroy it and he doesn’t see it as anything special. Which means that he doesn’t see us as anything special. We were only ever just a means to an end to him and all this time he has been experimenting. I thought that Kull and I were the only ones who suffered. How many others have there been over the years?”

“I wouldn’t like to think about it,” Ambrosia said in a gentle voice. “I know that this is hard for you, Typhon, but perhaps it’s good that you have seen this with your own eyes. You can’t be blinded with ambition again. There’s no denying what kind of man Vance is. You don’t have to define yourself by what you mean to him.”

“I know that now,” I admitted. “I know that I’m never going to be anything more to him than a piece of flesh. None of us are. He doesn’t see us as pure bloods, only as things grown by his scientists. He could discard us as easily as a rotten piece of meat. And he is going to use them to go to war and how much blood is going to be spilled? How much pain is going to be endured? How much death is going to happen in his name? And at the end of it all none of these soldiers are going to be remembered or honored. Vance is going to stand tall and claim all the credit for himself. He’s never going to acknowledge that he’s done anything wrong. He thinks he can get away with everything. I’m going to prove him wrong. I’m going to kill him,” I turned away, but Ambrosia caught my arm.

“Wait, Typhon. I know that you’re hurting a lot right now and you’re filled with emotions. I’m glad that you want to right the injustices of the world, but this isn’t the right time. We need a plan. We need to think things through properly because if you go and fight Vance then there are going to be a hundred wolves standing in your way. Let us take some time to figure this out,” she said. I turned to face her. She placed a hand against my cheek. I closed my eyes at her touch and breathed deeply, hoping to absorb some of her tranquil nature.

“This is a huge breakthrough Typhon. I’m only sorry that it did not come naturally. It would have been better if you came to this realization yourself without having to see something so shocking, but we can take this new perspective and we can do something positive with it. Your purpose is clear. I know you wanted to stand beside Vance but you’re a better person than he is. You shouldn’t aspire to be respected by him because look at what he’s capable of. What kind of person would you have to be to earn his respect? I think it’s a badge of honor that he doesn’t respect you, quite frankly. You’re a good man and you know what the hallmark of a good leader is?”

I opened my eyes and furrowed my brow, looking at her with a hint of a question.

“It’s caring about others and defending those who cannot defend themselves. These wolves that are being bred, so far they haven’t had a voice. They haven’t been able to define their own existence, and they certainly haven’t been able to defend themselves. They need a leader to represent them, and I think you’re perfect for the job. We just need to speak with Kull and Vali and come up with a plan because Vance has to be stopped and you’re just the person to do it,” she said. She punctuated her words with a kiss. Her lips were soft and tender but most importantly they were soothing. The turmoil within was calmed and I found myself holding onto her, kissing her more deeply. I ran my hands through her hair and lost myself within her, because right now she was the only thing that made sense to me.