Page 8 of The Wildcat and the Rogue (The Shifter Season #8)

JANE

Inviting Ewan to my bed chamber was a foolish thing to do. If my cousin were to find out, I would be banished from his house and have nowhere else to live. And yet I keep looking out of the window, waiting for the moment I'm going to see the telltale grey stripes of a wildcat appear.

I sigh and turn away from the window. This is ridiculous. I should close it and be done with all of this. It's not like there is anything I can do to help Ewan anyway, nor should I. He's a thief, and that's not the kind of person I should be getting involved with.

A soft thud sounds from behind me, followed by a meow. Despite the urge to turn around, I stay facing the wall, waiting until Ewan tells me he's decent and that I can turn around.

"It's safe to look."

I turn slowly, my heart racing even though I know he's going to be dressed. He runs a hand through his unruly hair, his shirt open a little at the neck and without a cravat. I swallow hard. This isn't supposed to be how gentlemen appear in front of eligible ladies.

And yet here he is, in my room and looking at me intently.

"Ewan," I murmur.

He quirks an eyebrow. "So we're divesting ourselves of formalities?"

"You are in my room, I believe they're already divested," I point out.

"Did I misunderstand you last night? I can go, if you wish." He gestures to the window and it's all I can do to stop myself from calling out the word no .

"You didn't misunderstand," I say instead. "You said there were things we could not discuss at the ball?"

He nods. "Is there a chance we could sit while we have this conversation?"

I glance at my bed, the only available place that the two of us can sit. I gesture to it, feeling a little nervous about the decisions I'm making that are leading to us here.

Even so, I take my seat and move my skirt around so that it falls around my legs properly. It doesn't do much to distract me from the intense intimacy of the moment.

"I don't really know where to begin," I say, realising that of all the things I've considered about this conversation, that isn't one of them.

"I suppose that depends on what you want to know."

"It sounded like you thought my help could be beneficial."

He sighs and takes a seat next to me. "It's more that I suspect you might have information that could help me, rather than doing anything."

"I'll admit to being intrigued."

He's so close that we could touch, but he's also clearly placed himself far enough away from me that it isn't something that will happen accidentally. I'm not entirely certain how I feel about that. It is foolish of us to have put ourselves in this position, especially when we can't be married, and yet I want to be close to him. I want more than anything to find out what it's actually like to kiss him.

He sighs and runs a hand over his face. "Where to begin."

"The beginning, perhaps."

"So with my father. I doubt that will surprise you."

"I've been subjected to his ways," I respond.

"You should tell me what happened," he says softly. "Perhaps then I can do something about it."

"He took all of our money," I respond flatly. "That is all you need to know."

A pained expression crosses his face. "I am sorry."

"As am I. But truly, it isn't your doing, Ewan. You don't control him."

"Unfortunately not. I have tried, but he won't listen to me. He spends money before he can make it. The barony is close to bankruptcy."

"Ah."

"As soon as I realised the kind of man my father has become, and the fact he isn't going to change, I started seeking out my own fortune," he says.

I raise an eyebrow. "By stealing?"

"In effect. But it is not what you think. My assignments are to retrieve items that have been stolen in the first place or have otherwise been gained through deceit."

"Are you truly naive enough to believe that?" I ask. "All anyone would have to do is say that something they covet was theirs in the past, and you would go steal it?"

"No. There is a process." From his face, it doesn't seem like he fully believes what he's saying. "I work for a gentleman who vets everyone who makes a request before passing them on to me."

I nod. "And you get paid for this work?"

"Handsomely."

"I assume your discomfort in the ballroom is because your latest assignment isn't going to plan?"

"You'd be correct." He picks up the sack he brought his clothes in and pulls out a pocketbook, handing it to me.

I know I should remain in the dark about his activities, but in all honesty, my curiosity is getting the better of me. I take it from him, my fingers brushing against his as I do.

A small gasp escapes me. I look up, meeting his gaze and feeling caught there. The world fades away and everything gets a little hazy.

"Jane," he whispers.

"Yes?" My heart races and I can't seem to hold onto a single thought.

He reaches out and brushes a strand of hair out of my face, his fingers caressing my skin as he does. This feels exactly the way it did when we almost kissed last year. I should turn away, but I don't want to.

My lips part of their own accord, drawing his attention to them. He searches my face, probably to work out if I'm caught in the same moment as he is, feeling the same things as he is.

The creaking of a door breaks through the moment, but it isn't until the shriek of the maid that I realise someone has walked into my room.

I move away from Ewan quickly, ignoring the urge to shift that builds inside me. It's a natural response to trying to get myself out of danger, but that's not going to work, especially when the maid is standing in the doorway and looking between Ewan and I as if she's seen a ghost.

"Sir, sir, come quick!" she calls, rushing out of the room in order to get my cousin.

I close my eyes and try to breathe. This is bad. I know better than to have invited Ewan into my room, especially in the evening when no one knows he's here. And now my cousin is going to throw me out of his house. And over what? Another missed kiss? A chance to experience what I want but not getting it?

I push the thought out of my mind. It's not what I should be focusing on right now.

"What do you want me to do?" Ewan asks softly. "I can shift and head out of the window again. You can claim I was never here."

I chew my bottom lip while I think, and his gaze immediately drifts down to the gesture. Perhaps I'm not the only one who is thinking of the missed opportunity. "If you wish to save yourself, then you should do that."

"What about you?"

"I don't think it will matter to my cousin one way or another if you are here. He will demand I leave his house either way." Dread builds inside me. It should be easy enough to spread the rumour that I've returned to Scotland of my own volition. He won't want the scandal attached to our family name here in London. But it will put an end to my search for a husband to take care of my family.

"Let me speak with him," Ewan says. "I'm not a nobody, perhaps I can smooth this over."

"I don't think that's going to be possible..."

A shadow appears in the doorway, and a man not much older than either of us appears. I jump to my feet and curtsy.

"What is the meaning of this, cousin?" he asks me sharply.

I swallow hard.

"This is my doing," Ewan says, standing up and holding out his hand. "Mr Milne, I'm a friend of the family and the son of Baron Striline."

"I've heard of you," my cousin says, ignoring the outstretched hand. "If you are a friend of the family, as you indeed say, then I am sure you must understand what must be done now."

"Yes, perhaps we could discuss that," Ewan says.

"At a more reasonable hour. You shall be escorted off the property now."

Ewan gives my cousin a tight smile. "Of course." He looks over at me.

" Now ," my cousin reiterates.

Ewan nods and makes his way out of the room, looking back with an apologetic expression on his face.

My cousin glares at me. "I should have known better than to say yes to your mother."

"It's not what it seems," I protest.

"Oh? And how would that be true? It is far past a reasonable hour for callers, and Mr Milne was in your room, alone. There is no how it seems , Jane. Just how it is. You should hope that Mr Milne is a reasonable man and will marry you. Thankfully, no one beyond this house currently knows of the situation. But servants talk, and I will not be the centre of speculation around the ton."

"No." I hang my head, trying to reconcile myself with what's happening.

"I shall have a maid lock your window and take away the key, and you will remain in your room except for meals tomorrow." He doesn't wait for me to respond and walks away.

I watch him leave, trying to work out what I'm going to do about the current situation. This is bad. I knew better than inviting Ewan here, and yet I did it anyway, knowing the consequences.

I touch my fingers to my lips. I should be thinking about the fact that my actions have led to some severe consequences, and some that I'm never going to be able to escape from. I've ruined myself and all prospects for my family. My cousin is never going to help us again.

And to make things worse, there's a part of me that isn't against marrying Ewan. A part of me that's glad it's him I'm going to be bound to. Guilt worms its way through me. It's going to mean the end of any chance of finding someone to support my sisters. We'll all be reliant on Baron Striline, the man who put us in this position to begin with.

I sit back on the bed, putting my hand down and hitting it against Ewan's pocketbook. My eyes widen. I never had a chance to read it, to know exactly what it is that he's been up to when I think he's thieving. At least reading it will give me a distraction while I'm locked in my room and hopefully help stop me from losing my mind.