Page 35 of The Warrior Priest (After the Rift #1)

Rhys patted the saddle on his horse. “Climb up, Jac. I’ll take you somewhere safe.”

Rufus moved to block my way. “She can ride with me. I can protect her equally as well as you. Probably better at the moment, considering your injured back.”

Rhys glanced sharply at me. When I showed no surprise at Rufus’s words, he tilted his head to the side, questioning.

“I’m a very good spy,” I said.

“And nosy.” He led his horse to Rufus and placed a hand on his friend’s shoulder. “While Jac’s life is in danger, she rides with me. I won’t risk your life or anyone else’s. That’s an order.”

“Bloody stupid one,” Rufus muttered, stepping aside.

“Then you shouldn’t have voted for me to lead you.” Rhys clutched Rufus’s arm. “But thank you. I’m glad you did.”

He helped me into the saddle as the other three mounted.

“Want us to warn the sheriff about Giselle?” Andreas asked.

“No. He may still be in the governor’s pocket. The power may have shifted, but we can’t be sure if we can trust him yet.”

Rhys settled behind me on the horse and took the reins in one hand, resting his other on the hilt of his sword.

Thanks to our closeness, and perhaps my heightened sense of touch, I detected a bandage wrapped around his torso as my back bumped against him.

I could also feel the tensing of muscles in his legs as he directed the horse to move.

His warm familiar scent was mixed with the herbal smell of a salve that had been applied to his wounds.

Being near Rhys had always been a heady, all-consuming experience, but now I knew why.

My senses were filled to the brim with him.

It could be a wonderful, deeply satisfying place to be. Or it could be dangerous if our enemies knew how he affected me.

Rhys was thinking about my senses, too. “I understand how heightened hearing, sight and smell manifest. But what about touch and taste?”

“I’m able to detect individual ingredients in a complicated dish, which I realized once I ate Mistress Lowey’s pies. She used to comment on how remarkable my sense of taste was. Before that, I thought everyone was like me. I also dislike boring food.”

“You made that clear when you refused to eat the meals I brought from the order. Even when you were starving, you would barely touch it.”

“If I had my way, your cook would be exiled from Glancia for the crime of cooking bland food.”

He laughed softly, his breath ruffling my hair. “And touch?” He released the sword hilt and lightly stroked my thigh with his thumb. My blood responded with a resounding thud and my cheeks flushed with heat.

I blew out a shuddery breath. “I feel everything, everywhere. The touch of something soft and smooth can be pleasurable, making all my nerve endings hum in delight. But pain…it hurts more than just at the source. I can feel it in my bones, my teeth, my scalp…”

“Merdu’s blood, Jac,” he whispered. “The cut in your side…I thought you were being dramatic when I cleaned it.”

“Once my shock and the numbness that went with it wore off, the pain was rather intense.”

“I should have been gentler. Next time?—”

“There won’t be a next time, Rhys. We both know that.”

We rode in silence for a while, every part of me tuned to him, so I felt him tense the moment before he spoke. “I’m sorry, Jac. Everything’s a mess. If I hadn’t been tempted?—”

“Don’t. Self-recrimination will only make you feel worse.” I laid a hand over his on the reins. Even though I couldn’t see his face, I heard the soft hitch in his breath.

The track widened, and Rufus rode up alongside us. “Next time you send a note, Jac, you should wait for assistance.”

I bristled. “I would if the situation was right, but I had to catch Giselle in the act otherwise she would never stop.” I turned in the saddle to appeal to Rhys.

“I will never believe it’s a good idea for you to confront a dangerous killer without me,” he said.

“There was a good reason?—”

“There is never a good reason.”

“There is,” I said testily. “We’ll confront my uncle with what we know and tell him we’ll go to the councillors if anything happens to me.

You can confront the high priest. They’ll both deny it, of course, but they’ll be forced to withhold their payments to Giselle, otherwise they risk public exposure. ”

“That may neutralize their involvement, but she isn’t doing it for the money, Jac. She must have other reasons to do this to you.”

“You’re right,” I said darkly. “She admitted as much.”

“She won’t stop until you’re dead.”

The steel in Rhys’s voice put me on edge. I suspected that was why he spoke so harshly. He wanted me to be worried, and therefore alert.

Rufus leaned toward us in the saddle. “At the risk of being stabbed by Rhys’s glare, I urge you to leave Tilting, Jac. For good.”

Behind me, Rhys swallowed heavily.

“I’ll go,” I agreed. “I’ll leave as soon as possible.”

Rufus didn’t want to leave Rhys alone with me at the inn, but Vizah and Andreas moved up alongside his horse, grabbed the reins, and led him away.

Rufus tried reasoning with his friends until they turned the corner.

He must have thought I couldn’t hear him at that point because he reminded them of what Rhys had already suffered by breaking his vow of celibacy in the past.

“That’s not why we’re walking away,” Andreas said.

“It isn’t?” Vizah asked.

“No. We’re leaving them alone so they can say proper goodbyes this time. This way it’ll be final.”

One of them gave a grudging grunt. I suspected it was Rufus when he said, “Very well.”

“It’s a good point,” Vizah added, his tone thoughtful. “We need to avoid the madness of last time. Maybe he’ll get rid of that beard now.”

One look at Rhys made it clear he hadn’t heard them.

He led the way inside and asked the innkeeper for a room, being particular to point out that I was a cousin staying in the city for the first time.

Once upstairs, Rhys inspected the crate of firewood.

“There’s enough here to keep you warm for one night.

There’s a jug of water and a basin. Both look clean. ”

“I can see that, thank you.”

He crossed to the other side of the room and rearranged the straw pallet to be closer to the fireplace. “It’s very basic. My apologies, I’d forgotten how cheap this place was.”

“You’ve stayed here before?”

“When I was younger.”

I wondered if he’d brought women here, then pushed the thought away.

“There are some blankets and cushions in that trunk,” he went on.

“I presumed as much.”

He lifted the trunk’s lid and pulled them out. “They’re clean.” He set about laying the blanket on the pallet. “I’ll ask the innkeeper to bring up something for you to eat so you don’t have to go downstairs.”

“Thank you, Rhys.”

He moved the cushion from one end of the pallet to the other then back again. “I think you should put your head at this end. That way you can see the door.” He shifted the pallet closer to the fireplace. “It won’t get too cold tonight, but you might find it more comfortable here.”

“Rhys.”

He straightened and studied the arrangement, then shifted the pallet back. “On second thoughts, you’ll feel too hot that close to the fire considering you’re sensitive to extreme temperatures.”

“Rhys,” I said, louder. “Thank you. I can manage.”

He sniffed the air. “Does it smell musty? Should I open the window?”

I moved to block his path to the window. “Rhys, be calm.”

“I am calm.”

“You’re wound up tighter than a cat stalking a bird.”

He finally looked at me. “Your acute senses telling you that?”

“No, my acute knowledge of you.” Perhaps it wasn’t a wise thing to admit, but my sharpened senses didn’t include the ability to know when to keep quiet. “Rhys, are you all right? The wounds on your back…”

“I’m fine. They’re nothing. I can’t even feel them.”

“That’s because you’ve applied Mistress Blundle’s numbing salve and have a bandage to protect them from the coarse fabric of the shirt beneath your tunic.” I plucked at his sleeve.

He crossed his arms, breaking the flimsy connection between us. “I feel fine. Thanks for asking.”

“You let the high priest do it, didn’t you?”

He looked away, confirming my suspicion.

“Did you two plan it?” I persisted.

“I wasn’t aware of his plan beforehand. Not until he arrived at the temple and informed me he had an idea to secure my role as leader. When his guards led me to the whipping post, I realized what he had in mind.”

“It was too late to stop him by then,” I said. “He forced it upon you.”

“It wasn’t too late. There were only two guards. The others were further away. My friends would have taken care of them.”

“The guards were armed with swords and none of you were.”

He merely shrugged, as if that were irrelevant.

“How can you be so nonchalant? Rhys, they could have inflicted more damage to your back, not to mention what affect the experience could have on your sense of self after being punished like that in front of your men.”

He smiled wryly. “Some would say I need to be brought down a peg or two.”

“Don’t make light of this!” I felt tears rushing to my eyes, but I couldn’t stop them. “Seeing you like that…it was sickening.”

“There’s a reason it wasn’t meant for public viewing.”

“Is that your way of telling me I shouldn’t have snuck into the tower to watch?

” I buried my face in my hands for a moment before confronting him again.

“I snuck in because I was worried. I sensed something was wrong when I saw the high priest. You can try to tell me I shouldn’t have worried, but it will do no good.

I will always worry about you, Rhys, even after I leave Tilting.

” I went to thump his arm because I wouldn’t allow myself to hold him.

He caught my fist and enclosed it in both of his hands.

“As I will always worry about you, Jac. It seems there’s nothing that can be done about it.

We’ll always feel this way. So we must acknowledge it.

” He lightly kissed my knuckles. “Then we move on.” He released me and turned away.

One hand on the mantelpiece, he drew in a measured breath as he stared into the empty fireplace.

“I don’t regret going along with the high priest’s scheme in the temple yard.

It was necessary to regain the respect I’d lost. The vote that followed was needed to reconfirm my position as leader.

Don’t tell Andreas, Vizah and Rufus. They won’t like that I willingly played my part.

Especially now, in light of the high priest’s actions against you.

By hiring Giselle, he has proved himself unworthy. ”

I wiped my damp cheeks and pressed a hand to my rapidly beating heart. “The doubters don’t deserve you if it was necessary for you to go to such lengths to prove your honor and loyalty. Anyone who knows you knows you’re dedicated to the order, that you love your brothers and your life there.”

The hand on the mantel closed into a fist. He thumped it then turned around. He looked much like the first time I’d seen him upon my return to Tilting, as if he hadn’t slept in days. “Jac, the order is not my only love, but it demands that it is.”

The muscles in my jaw ached as I tried to hold back my tears.

“But this is bigger than me,” Rhys went on. “Merdu’s Guards needs stability now more than ever, and a master they can all rally behind if we’re to oust the high priest from his position. Someone willing to go to great lengths to ensure justice is served.”

I huffed a laugh. “How ironic that the high priest’s failure to get rid of me is the very thing that reaffirms your reason to stay on as master.”

“Please don’t make this any harder than it is already,” he whispered.

I bit my lower lip and turned away. I drew in a fortifying breath and slowly released it. It gave me time to consider how to proceed. I turned back to face him again. “I’m coming to the high temple with you to confront him.”

“No, you’re not.” He rested a hand on the hilt of his sword. “Your presence might provoke him to finish the job that Giselle couldn’t. I can’t risk that.”

“Why not confront him publicly? It’s the best way to force him to resign, and he won’t attack either of us in public.” When he didn’t answer, I forged on. “He doesn’t deserve the dignity you’re affording him.”

Rhys went to push past me to the door but stopped. “When this is over, I’ll make sure the governor is brought to justice, too.”

“How?”

His gaze searched my face, as if taking in my features all over again. “Whatever happens, stay here. Giselle will be looking for you.”

“But Rhys?—”

“No, Jac. Nothing you say will stop me, so let’s not part in anger.” He removed his glove and caressed my jawline with his thumb . He smiled sadly. “I’ll see that your pendant is returned to you, but we won’t be seeing one another again.”

I watched him go with an ache in my chest so fierce that I felt like I was suffocating.

I collapsed onto the pallet and drew up my knees.

I hugged them and cried for Hailia knew how long.

The last time I left Tilting having not said goodbye to Rhys in person had hung over me like a cloud, and a part of me had known I’d return to right that wrong.

But this time he had said goodbye. This time he’d made it clear we wouldn’t be seeing one another again. He’d made his choice to stay in the order, and I couldn’t sway him from that path.

I wasn’t enough.

When my body ran dry of tears, I lay down and stared up at the ceiling. As much as I didn’t want to go over our final conversation in my head, I couldn’t set it aside yet. I replayed every word in my head, recalled every crease of his brow, and felt intense pain in my heart all over again.

Then I suddenly sat up.

This is bigger than me , Rhys had claimed. It was something people said when they sacrificed themselves for a greater good. I’d thought Rhys meant he was sacrificing himself by staying leader of Merdu’s Guards when he didn’t want to. Taken on its own, his words gave me no reason to think otherwise.

But when added to his lack of a response when I suggested he confront the high priest publicly, and when he hadn’t answered my question about how he planned to bring my uncle to justice, it might have meant something else altogether.

Perhaps he wasn’t going to force either man to resign or have them arrested. Perhaps he was going to kill them.

And he didn’t expect to get away with it. Knowing Rhys, he intended to turn himself in afterward—if he lived.