Page 14 of The Valentine Skates
Her old governess poked her head around the side of the door. “Where are you going now?” She pointed to the rapidly filling trunk.
“It’s time to rejoin my mother. She hasn’t been well for some time, and it’s unfair to leave her alone to bear the burden of tending to Howick House and all the entertaining my brother’s position requires.”
Helena did not contradict her account but simply sat on the bed and leveled a long, steady look toward her. “You’re running away to London to hide.” She was not posing a question.
“No…”
“Your mother has a houseful of servants at her beck and call.” She ignored the mutinous look Lili threw her way, and forged on.
“The only reason you’re fleeing to London is you’re a coward.”
Lili flinched.
“You’re terrified there might be a chance for happiness with Squire Meredith. Getting thetonto forgive you is not the problem. You have to forgive yourself first.”
“But my brother died because of me.”
“You didn’t kill your brother. That was the work of those Barbary heathens.”
“You don’t understand, Helena.”
“What don’t I understand?”
“I’m not the innocent young woman who left England all those years ago. I’m not fit to be around poor Emily, let alone to act as her mother.”
“I’ve seen you with that child. When you’re with her, you’re not acting. You’re mothering her, and she knows it. If you leave now, you’ll break two other hearts, not just your own.” The look Helena directed at her made Lili feel like she was back in the schoolroom all those years ago, and she’d disappointed her governess.
Frederick started out of a deep sleep. Some small sound had invaded the far corners of his consciousness. He’d developed a keen sense of hearing when Emily was a baby. Although he’d hired a competent nurse, he’d always wanted to be there if his daughter needed him.
The first time he’d held her in his arms, after her mother had died, he’d known he couldn’t give her over to distant relatives to raise. He and Emily had bonded from the beginning. The alert, intense hazel eyes staring back at him from the tiny newborn’s face had radiated a fierce, kindred spirit.
In the years since, he’d come to realize his daughter would probably one day take responsibility for Weyford Manor and all the tenant farmers who had come to rely on their family for generations for support and guidance. At eight years old she already knew more about the rhythm of farm life than some men three times her age.
Before the accident, she’d always insisted on tagging along with him to attend to every important chore on the farm. He’d had a shoemaker in the village craft specially sized sturdy work boots for the small girl once he’d realized she would not be deterred from following him on rounds of the estate, no matter the weather.
He’d sealed the curtains closed around his bed the night before to keep out the damp night air. When the opening twitched at a pull from the room outside, he sucked in a breath and reached for the club he always kept next to him on top of the counterpane. He’d assumed the noise he’d heard had been one of the servants laying a fire for his morning comfort, but none of them would disturb his slumber.
A hand snaked inside the opening, followed by a face he knew and loved well. “Lili…what in the name of all that’s holy are you doing here?”
She said nothing, but took two soft fingers and pressed them against his lips. When he raised himself up on his elbows to protest, she slithered beneath the linens and covered his body with her warm one. Skin slid against skin as she covered him with her warmth.
All he could manage was a shaky “Why?”
“Because I want you to make love to me. I want the man who penetrates this barrier of shame to be you.”
When he tried to push her away, she squirmed her way down his hardened length and took his cock inside her.
Lili spread her legs wide and surged downward. Gliding on the moisture seeping between them, she nudged her sex over the crown of his cock and spread the slickness in a circular motion until he groaned in protest beneath her.
Gathering the lavender scented linens around her shoulders, she rose onto her knees and prepared to work her way down on his cock to force penetration.
Frederick rose up suddenly, breaking the connection. He gathered her into his arms and kissed her ear before whispering an urgent warning. “I cannot let you do this.”
She leaned a bit away from his face in the darkened room. “You are not to blame. This is not your decision.”
He sucked in a breath as if to argue, but she stopped him.
“I am soiled goods as far as society is concerned. They would never believe a preposterous claim that I’m in fact unsullied…a virgin.” She drew out a long moment of silence, all the while feeling his cock twitch at the entrance to her quim. “I have decided I do not wish to spend my life never knowing a man’s love, merely to maintain some purity everyone believes is lost anyway.” She suddenly pushed him back onto the bed and sank sharply down, taking all of his cock. She gave out a sharp wince before sighing and squeezing him with her vaginal walls.