Page 80 of The Unlikely Heir

“I’m glad you had that,” I manage.

She manages to rummage up a small smile. “I hope you will be as fortunate as I was,” she says quietly.

Her words leave me feeling hollow.

Two days later is the Order of the Garter ceremony, where the history nerd inside me does a happy dance at becoming part of an order of chivalry founded in 1348. And then it’s the beginning of Royal Ascot.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I say the morning the famous races start, taking in the top hat and tailcoat Herbert has laid out for me. “Isn’t it forecasted to be eighty-five degrees today?”

We’re partway into June, but until now, the only difference I’ve noticed between spring and summer is the propensity of people to now react to any sliver of sun by stripping down to their bathing suits in public parks. There definitely hasn’t been any warming of the weather, with the mercury hovering stubbornly around sixty degrees.

“I believe it’s going to be thirty degrees, yes,” Herbert says.

Celsius. Fahrenheit. Why come up with a second scale to measure temperature when you had a perfectly functioning first scale? I make a mental note to Google it later.

“Tops and tails are the standard attire for Royal Ascot, Your Royal Highness. There is a strict dress code inside the royal enclosure,” Herbert continues.

“Oh. Right.”

With minor help from Herbert, I put on the suit, waistcoat, and tie, replaying his words. Tops and tails sounds like an interesting sexual position.

And…now I’m thinking about Oliver again because it’s a joke I want to share with him. And okay, okay, it’s also because if there’s anyone I’m interested in exploring sexual positions with right now, it’s definitely Oliver. Our kiss provided my imagination with source material, and it’s been happily extrapolating what could come next.

Pulling my mind away from erotic fantasies involving the prime minister, I venture down the stairs to where Raymond is waiting.

“You’re riding in the carriage with Her Majesty, Prince Nicholas, and Princess Amelia,” Raymond informs me.

“Okay.”

As the courtiers fuss around, directing us into the carriages, I can’t help feeling like they’re the stage directors and we are merely actors. Interchangeable as long as someone is there playing the role.

“Prince Callum sits next to the queen, Princess Amelia and Prince Nicholas opposite,” Clive, my grandmother’s private secretary, instructs.

Nicholas’s face twists into a momentary scowl, but it’s gone a second later, leaving his usual smirk behind.

We climb into the carriage. If there’s an elegant way to enter a carriage, I haven’t found it yet.

Nicholas wears a top hat and tails like me, Amelia is in a pink sundress with a horse pin prominently displayed, and my grandmother is dressed head to toe in mauve with a hat that could double as a floral centerpiece.

“I like your hat, Gran,” I say.

“The public places bets on my hat, so I always try to surprise them,” she says with a gentle smile.

Nicholas regards me as we settle into the carriage. It’s part of a cavalcade of six carriages, each adorned with gold trimmings and pulled by immaculately groomed gray horses.

“I guess this is quite the change of scene for you, isn’t it, Callum? From the land of hamburgers and hot dogs to the world of top hats and tailcoats,” he says.

“Yep. I’m definitely not in California anymore.”

We lurch off. I’ve recently discovered that carriages are quite a bumpy mode of transport. Henry Ford definitely did us all a favor by inventing the automobile.

I can’t help wondering if my disgraced aunts, uncles, and cousins are watching this and feeling resentful they aren’t part of it? Or is some part of them relieved to be free from the weight of tradition and expectations?

I nod at Amelia’s pin. “I see you are getting into the spirit of horse racing, Mellie.”

“It’s actually the symbol of Yennenga, a famous warrior princess from Burkina Faso,” Amelia says.

As we travel, Amelia fills me in on the details about Yennenga, who was apparently such an important fighter for her father, King Nedega, that he refused her to marry, leading her to escape from his palace and fall in love with an elephant hunter.