Page 46 of The Unbound Witch
“Are you trying to avoid Nym? Think she will still be at the black castle? And what about Scoop?” She picked at a piece of lint from the pile of old blankets hung over her arm.
With great effort, I lifted the blankets she'd thrown to me. A success, but nothing worthy of celebration.
“I'm not sure what I'm avoiding.” If I had a heartbeat, it might have slowed, might have felt heavy. “I think it's Scoop. I can't explain it, but I just miss him. I am so far removed from the witch I once was. It's different.”
I couldn’t… wouldn’t talk about Nym. Wouldn’t remind myself that she would always be someone I lost. The witch who’d empowered me to push through the Trials when I’d felt like leaving, who’d been there when Raven was not… The woman that was so easy to love and fear and treasure… I wasn’t ready to mourn the loss of us. To see the horror on her face and let it be my final defeat.
But Scoop? The severance of my connection to him, a piece of my soul? No matter how much I might have loved Nym, he would always be my greatest loss.
Raven set her blankets down on the shelf lining the back wall beneath the window. She held her hands out to me, palms up.
“You won't—”
“Take my hands, Kir.”
Dropping the blankets onto her pile, I inched forward, sliding my palms over the top of hers, waiting for the chill that was my new curse to make her shudder, to draw back, to run, even.
She held steady, her light blue eyes meeting mine. “I feel you, Kir. And if you cannot, then I will feel for both of us. You are no less than you were a month ago. Changed, but nothing less. If you're hurting, then I'm hurting. If you're celebrating, then I am. You've always been the best part of this friendship. I won't let you falter. Because you would never let me.”
A brush, a small inkling of a sensation radiated through my palms. I felt her, too. I moved, resting my forehead on hers as I closed my eyes. “I don't think I want to be here, Raven. I know that must hurt to hear, but this isn't an eternity for me. It’s miserable to sit in a room full of people and feel so fucking lonely.”
“Then we find a way to send you back.”
“Promise?”
Her nod against my forehead gave the same sensation as our joined hands. Whatever I was lacking in this world, the unwavering love of a friend was not one of them. But I didn't know if it was enough. I pulled away, lifting the blankets I dropped.
“You're getting pretty good at that,” she said.
I smiled, pushing back the pain as I always did. “Seems silly to even mention it.”
“Name one wraith you've ever seen lift a single object.” She leaned against the counter, clasping her hands in front of her. “Go ahead. I'll wait.”
“I said I didn't want to be here, not that I wasn't a fucking spectacular wraith.”
* * *
They slept.Solidly, but not soundlessly, thanks to the wolf's obnoxious snoring. The days were longer now. No rest for the wicked, no rest for the wraiths. Invisible, I'd gathered some of the unspoiled food from our neglected autumn harvest, and Raven had made a squash soup, using her fire magic to sear the fresh vegetables. I wanted to taste that sweetness on my tongue, feel the sensation of being full, but that was no longer possible. I'd hovered in the corner, watching them cast within the salt circle as envy poisoned my mind. The need to feel the power beneath my skin, the sorrow of not having Scoop beside me overwhelmed me. I didn't want to feel this way, but I always came back to it. As if I was supposed to find comfort in that haunting sorrow. I sure as fuck did not.
Leaving Crescent Cottage as they slumbered, I wove invisibly through the town square, noting the groove along the bricks lit by the moonlight. With an eternity of haunting this realm before me, I took my time. Eden's barrier was not the same as Bastian's. It circled the shop solidly but unseen, like a second skin. Luckily, I had Eden’s magical permission to cross the barrier. Without it, I’d have never been able to leave. She was powerful in her own way. Lucky witch.
Reaching my hand out, I brushed my ghostly fingers along the familiar buildings packed together in the square. What was I doing? I could absolutely breach any of these walls and explore these witches’ domains. Search the shops and snoop through their things. I soared down the road toward Claire Moonfly's bakery, wondering whether I’d be able to see my breath in the late autumn air, if I had any. I didn't even know if it was cold outside. A blessing, I supposed.
Pushing through the door without a thought, I waited for the smell to slam into me as it always did. I remembered hungry days when my father and I would walk by just to smell what we could not have. Disappointment was all that greeted me. Wicker baskets full of breads and muffins and flour and sugar filled one wall. The rest of the store was empty. A sign that winter was coming, and, like it or not, everyone needed to start hoarding their wares in preparation. Most of the witches envied Claire and her family for their endless supply of food when others could only dream of it. I knew better, though. I knew she spent most of the winter months with only bread to keep her belly full, willing to trade with us for seasonal vegetables from our gardens when she became humble enough to ask.
The witches were stupid, I decided. For all their starving, if they would just stop with the animosity and work together, this land would have far less scars. I lifted a long skinny loaf from a basket, the crust crunching and flaking away as I squeezed. I guess that was no longer my problem.
I smirked. I bet the wolf would beg for fresh bread. I shot toward the door. I would bring back one of the pumpkins from the garden and leave it on the counter as payment. However, as I soared through the door, the damn bread couldn't. A solid object. I'd never wanted to punch a window so bad in my life. In my fuckingafterlife.
I moved back through the door, unlocked the handle and opened it. Like a normal person. After leaving the pumpkin on the countertop minutes later, I relocked the door, hoping the others would be grateful for my single loaf of bread. Still, I would have paid money to see the look on someone's face as a pumpkin floated down the street. Missed opportunity. I'd have to do that again in daylight just for fun. I’m not sure anyone knew the wraiths could just vanish all together, but they certainly couldn’t hold things.
* * *
“Did you steal this?”Raven asked, slicing the bread I'd acquired.
“No?”
Torryn snorted. “Why answer with a question?”