Page 27 of The Publicist
There is so much more I want to say, but I bite the inside of my cheek to stop from going into a full rant. My phone chirps a few minutes later with his reply.
Caleb:I’ll be there in 20 minutes.
Was he done filming for the day, or did he run out? Can you just run off set for the day? I don’t think he can, so he must have been done. The butterflies begin in my stomach, and I try my hardest to not become too giddy. I freshen up and splash some cold water on my face. I’m setting myself up for disappointment, but I change into a knee-length skirt, casual tank top, and a sexy pair of panties with a lacy bra. I’m always on my best game when I feel sexy, and I’m going to need to be on my game when I see him. After another look around the room, I hear a quiet knock on the door. When I look through the peephole, Caleb is standing there with his hair a bit disheveled in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. That man sure knows how to fill out his clothes.
I open the door, and he looks relieved. “Hey, Caleb, come on in.” I smile and he leans in, placing his hand gently on my arm and a light kiss on my cheek. He smells amazing, and I have to stop myself from wrapping myself around him.
“Thanks for inviting me over,” he says, walking into the room and taking a seat. “I’m so sorry about everything I said. You hit a sore spot, and I lashed out at you. I shouldn’t have done that. I wish I could take back everything I said. It didn’t come out right at all. I’ve missed you these past few weeks. I feel lost without you.”
I hold my hand up to stop his ramble. “I know. I’m sorry, too. I shouldn’t have been prying into your personal life, and I overreacted when you said what you did.”
“I really didn’t mean it, Quinn. I think you’re beautiful. I was so nervous I was going to fuck everything up with you that I ended up doing just that.” He places his large hand over his face and drags his fingers down it, stretching the skin in frustration. “Can we start over? I promise not to be an ass, and you promise not to stop talking to me?”
I bob my head back and forth, weighing his words. “Just try to not be an ass, and I’ll do the same.” I smile and he returns the gesture, then I dive into safe territory. “So, tell me about filming so far.”
Chapter 24
I’m sorelieved when she accepts my apology. I feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. We spend the next twenty to thirty minutes talking about how filming is going and how her job has been going lately.
“Thank you for staying out of the media this past month. It has made my job a lot easier,” she says, a slight blush on her cheeks.
“I was reminded by Elena that you would kick my ass if I didn’t behave.” I chuckle.
“Yes, well, she’s right.” She pauses and takes a deep breath. “I like her a lot. She’s good for you and I can see why you’re friends with her. My first assumption of her was wrong, and I’m glad it was. We’ve gotten a lot closer over the past few weeks. I originally thought she was a big partier like you, but she clued me in on why she goes with you. It’s really sweet of her, actually.”
I look at her, concern on my face. “How much did she tell you?”
She places her hand on my arm and gives me a small smile. “Not much, just enough to let me know you were in a bad place and she made sure you didn’t do anything too stupid.”
“Do you want to know what happened?” I don’t recognize the small voice that leaves my lips.
“Only if you want to share. I don’t want to force you to tell me anything you don’t want to.”
The need to tell her is so strong. Besides Elena, she is the only person I feel close enough with to clue in on what a fuck up I really am. I’m scared as to how she’s going to react, and I don’t want her pity. But it was a mistake I have to own, and Idoown it. I take a deep breath and begin. “You were right. I did cheat on my ex. Cassandra and I were high school sweethearts. We began dating our senior year and were together all through college. When I decided to move to Hollywood to pursue my acting career, she came with me—no questions asked.”
I smile at the memory of our first apartment; it was a shit hole that had us basically living on top of one another, but we were happy. “She got a job as an office manager for a small company, and I started going to auditions. I snagged a few small roles before I got cast as Antonio Donato. It was huge, and we were both so excited. She couldn’t come with me on location, and that’s when it happened. I was an idiot. I was missing her a lot and drank too much. I hooked up with some random chick from a bar I visited.” I clench my fists, trying to keep my anger at bay.
“You two were at the red carpet premiere together though. I’ve seen the picture. You’re saying you cheated on her prior to that?” she asks, a small tilt to her head.
“Yeah. I kept it from her for almost a year. I felt bad about it, but it was a one-time mistake that I was never going to repeat.”
“So, did you finally tell her, or did she find out on her own?”
I huff out a breath and look up at the ceiling, trying to calm my nerves. “She found out the night of the premiere. The chick I cheated on her with was there and approached us. I didn’t recognize her, but she remembered me all right. Cass and I went back to our apartment, and when I woke up the next morning, she was gone. I tried calling and showing up at her job, but I couldn’t get to her. She blocked me in every way possible. Her parents wouldn’t tell me anything about her whereabouts. It’s like she dropped off the face of the planet, and I lost the one girl that I could trust with everything. Right after that, I fell off the wagon. It was easier to drink and not feel than to sit at home and miss her. After a while, I stopped missing her, but I was so accustomed to the partying that it was better to keep going.”
Her eyes stay glued to mine, but she doesn’t say anything. Finally, after what feels like an eternity, she opens her mouth and the most beautiful words fall from her lips. “You didn’t deserve that.” Relief washes over me with those four words. “I’m not saying what you did was acceptable, but she shouldn’t have left you like that. Not without giving you the chance to talk about it.”
“Thank you.” I give her a small smile.
“Have you ever been able to get back in touch with her?”
I shake my head. “No, I found her through different social media sites, but her pages are private. I haven’t wanted to request to be her friend, and I figure she wouldn’t add me anyway.”
“Do you think she would give you another chance if you reached out to her?”
“Not a chance in hell. She did everything for me, and I fucked it up. Honestly, I would be mad at her if she gave me another chance. She deserves better than me.” I rake my fingers through my hair and tug on the ends, making them stick up on the sides. She’s watching me intently. “What?” I ask, looking into her beautiful eyes.
“You just surprise me, that’s all.”