22
Alpha
Saint
A rtemis has been quiet today.
It's driving me fucking crazy . My wolf watches her from the depths of my consciousness, green eyes focused on the blonde with dark eyes. She's sitting in her window seat, where she's been all day. Chewing the skin around her thumbnail raw.
I don't think she would have eaten anything today had I not put it before her.
There's a distance around her, a giant wall I don't know how to cross.
I can't help but wonder if her silence is directly related to me and my proximity. Is Artemis shutting me specifically out?
After asking around, I know that Artemis's dad was killed by a hunter and that she was there. I didn't ask for more details. At the time, it felt like an intrusion into her privacy. Now, I wish I had.
Jealousy ripples through me as I ponder if she's so quiet because she just wants Jay .
For just a brief moment, I let myself wonder what it would have been like if I'd made a move before Jay, if I had been the one to become Artemis' boyfriend instead. I just want her to be happy, and I'm finding myself at a loss about how to make that happen.
Don't be jealous. My wolf snarks, crossing his paws and laying his head down on them.
I'm trying.
I guess, for a start, I'll just bring her a snack.
Artemis
Jay's been gone all morning, though Saint has been home with me. He keeps himself busy, wandering around the house. I can see him from my perch on the window seat. He's been making sure I eat and drink water.
Meanwhile, I've chewed the skin around my thumbnail raw, overanalyzing every interaction I've ever had with the Whites.
Did they know? Have they known this whole time what I am?
If I'm not thinking about that, I think about the full Moon tonight. Enough people have complained about Magnus canceling the full moon run that he changed his mind. We won't go outside Pack lands or venture far from the Hollow. It will likely be enough for most of the Pack.
But I can feel the call of the forest in my blood. I won't be able to stay out of the deep forest. I know it.
My wolf craves the solace of the trees just as much as I do.
But will the forest be safe? Will Ethan and his brothers be prowling for animals with coats like mine in the darkness?
Around and around, my thoughts spin until I'm convinced that Ethan did not know at first. There is no way.
We met at a car show. Ethan had treated me hardly any better than a Track Tramp until I beat him in a drag race event once in an at-the-time friend's borrowed car.
But it's very possible that he found out at some point.
If they hunted the grounds, they might have trail cameras set up on the Estate.
Or he figured it out when he darkened my doorstep. I have no idea how long Ethan was in the Hollow or Sommerville when he came to demand my return, even going so far as to try and tell me Sam was dead.
Maybe Ethan saw the wildlife when he was here. Had he run on trails like he had been last night? Maybe spotted a wolf or wolves.
And... Does it even matter? We just need to get him to leave before someone else in this Pack ends up dead.
With that settling over my shoulders, my breathing slows. I'm sure of it now. Ethan knows I am a wolf. He found out at some point.
Maybe we really will be able to bite his hand off. I whisper to my wolf , her golden eyes keeping watch from the dark corners of my mind. She's close to the surface, the Moon pulling her while my anxious thoughts drive her forward.
Something is going to happen tonight. I can feel it.
The Cold Moon is the longest night of the year, and the addition of Ethan's presence is bound to make it feel even longer.
Normally, I would revel in the forest, overjoyed at the prospect of the Cold Moon and the ability to chase it into the early hours of the morning. I can picture the quiet hush of a sleeping forest muted with freshly fallen snow. I can picture the naked deciduous trees reaching up to the sky with empty branches. Evergreen pines dot the hillside, limbs laden with snow.
Tonight, the Moon will be in the sky for the longest- it will linger high in the inky blackness over the treetops until the forest wakes up. And I can't help but feel like it's a mistake to go into the darkened depths of the trees. I won't be able to stop myself, but…
The lingering aura of danger lingers over the forest in a way I've never felt before.
I'm grateful, at least, to have the Pack with me tonight. Jay and Saint. I know Jay has to lead the Pack, but that at least means that we will be at the front. I won't have to linger behind.
After Saint brings me another snack, I get dressed for the gathering. Black thermal leggings, a waffle knit long sleeve under one of the boys' t-shirts, I honestly don't know which- and I don't care. I quickly slap a little makeup on my face, throwing my hair into a couple of loose braids. Before I leave my room, I grab my fleece flannel for the top layer; the boots I want are downstairs. The forecast for the aptly named Cold Moon is going to be fucking freezing.
Saint is dressed in dark jeans and a long-sleeved shirt pushed up to his elbows, the gold chains around his neck disappearing underneath. There's a look in his eye that I don't know how to define.
My wolf whines, her claws echoing in my skull as she paces. She is too close. How long will I be able to hang out at the Packhouse? I want to run already.
I almost ask Saint to run there with me instead, opening my mouth to do just that when he asks, "Are you ready?"
"Yep," I answer instead, giving him a tight smile. On my way to the garage, I nearly bumped into him.
Instead, though, he grabs my waist, pulling me to his chest roughly.
As abruptly as he pulls me to him, Saint puts a hand around my jaw, tilting my face towards his. He kisses me harshly, almost angrily, before saying, "Stay with the Pack tonight, please?"
I almost argue, the words rising in my mouth before I remember that Saint's Pack kicked him out. He probably is just nervous. Wants the comfort of his Pack on a stressful night like this.
Still, I can't read his eyes when I answer softly. "Okay."
Saint's smile is small, almost sad, as he pulls away and leads me out into his orange SUV.
Without any preamble, he takes me to the Packhouse. Saint sings and whistles along with the radio, but I don't. I'm too tense. About the Whites and about the kisses Saint keeps giving me. I don't mind, but I'm starting to feel guilty about them.
Once inside the hulking brick building, I immediately find Jay, filling him in on what I've pieced together. I have his rapt attention while I speak. Jay's jaw flexes as he looks at me from under lowered brows.
Jay merely presses a kiss to my forehead and says, "Don't worry, I'll take it from here," when I'm done spilling my guts in front of him.
And then, he's off doing just that, I presume. Spotting Sam and Aggie over on the side of the room, I gravitate towards them.
Despite Saint's absence at the Packhouse earlier today, snacks are abundant, and tables laden with food are strewn throughout the large gathering hall. Either Saint pre-made a bunch of this earlier this week, or someone ordered catering.
When I pass one of the tables, I snag a pastry and take a big bite.
I close my eyes as the flavor bursts across my tongue. Definitely Saint's cooking.
Jay has been standing with Magnus for the better part of the night. The metaphorical passing of the crown to Jay is as simple as Magnus relinquishing control. And Jay has to accept it.
After tonight, with Jay leading the Pack through the Full Moon, he will become Alpha. When we were kids, it had always been a joke to call him Alpha, and I'd always pushed against his logic when he tried to use that leverage against me.
Now, though, my heart soars, watching him take charge of our Pack. He looks so natural there, surrounded by Dante, Saint, Nero, and other enforcers. Nero will still be the Pack's lawyer, even if he is no longer Beta.
I'm beyond ready to get started with the run. And, feeling Jay's eyes on me from across the room, I suspect he is also aware.
As if I'd spoken the thought aloud, Magnus gathers the Pack's attention by stepping into the center of the room. A quiet hush replaces the gentle hum of conversation.
"Thank you all for coming to tonight's Full Moon gathering. The Cold Moon, and my beloved Indie's birthday. I know everyone is tense with the Hunters this year, and I assure you, tonight is cause for celebration. I would like to proudly say that I am no longer your Alpha."
The Pack gasps like this was not expected. Anyone with eyes can see that Jay has been positioned to take over for quite some time now.
"My son, Jay, is stepping up to take my place-" Magnus's speech goes on, and I don't think I've ever heard him gush like this about anything.
I wonder if Alex and Helena know he's Alpha now. If Magnus asked Alex if he wanted the birthright currently being thrust upon Jay.
Then, for a moment, I let myself worry about whether Jay wants kids. If my decisions when I was young will splinter us apart in the future. I don't want kids. I never have. But a small part of me wonders if that will be the eventual cause of Jay and I splitting up. As quickly as the thought comes to me, I shove it away. I can't think about that. Not right now. Maybe, not ever.
"Tonight, I ask, let us run with our Alpha and think of my Indie while you bathe in the Moon's light. She would be so proud of you, Son. As I am," Magnus finishes, holding an arm out, inviting Jay to step into the spotlight.
Jay says, "Thank you, Dad. That means a lot." He gives a small nod to Magnus, and then I'm staring at the Alpha—not just my Alpha, the Alpha.