Page 15 of The Masks We Wear (Satan’s Angels #1)

“Yeah.” I sigh as I look down. I look up at Harvey to find his eyes on me.

We stare at each other for a split second before his phone rings and he takes the call with no hesitation.

He turns his back on me and walks away so he can speak in private.

This is the moment I’ve been waiting for.

Harvey Taylor, FUCK YOU! “Let’s go to the studio.

” I demand, grabbing both of their arms with excitement in my tone and in my eyes. My body just came alive.

“Now?” Ivory asks, confusion in her tone.

I drag them along, “Yes, now! Let’s go before the babysitter gets back. I got a bag of edibles.”

“Say less.” Aria starts running beside me and soon we’re a mess of giggles and chuckles. We continue running until we get our hands on the baggie and find our way out of the building. We don’t stop running until we make it to the street and then we flag a cab down.

––––––––

“MY MOUTH IS SO fucking dry.” Ivory complains from where she lies on the floor, staring up at the ceiling.

“Here.” Aria laughs as she passes Ivory the gigantic bottle of whiskey we’ve been sharing. Ivory takes a huge sip and sighs, relaxing.

This is exactly what I needed. A high, some whiskey, and my best friends.

Throw in the fact that we made a song minus the lyrics, and I’m golden.

We’ve been here for hours. Harvey free, Selene free, responsibility free, yet somehow still dressed in our schoolgirl uniforms. I jump off the couch and onto the coffee table, pointing at Aria, “This is fucking awesome.”

She laughs, “What is?”

I spin around on the table, “This! Us!”

Ivory chuckles, “We miss you.”

“I miss you guys too.” I lament, my features falling.

“This babysitter sucks. All he does is bitch me around and so does Selene. I get we’re facing potential jail time but come on.

I’m totally capable of staying out of jail and still getting high.

They just wanna kill my vibe.” I complain as I jump off the table and snatch up the bottle of whiskey.

I take a few large gulps and then hand it back to Ivory.

Aria frowns, “Sorry, Sticks.”

I shrug. “It’s only three months. Then he’s gone and we can go back to fucking shit up.”

“Wooooooo!” Ivory cheers.

“I’m shocked your phone hasn’t been going crazy with the babysitter trying to find you.” Aria admits.

I laugh, “I shut that shit off. He’s not finding me and he’s not ruining my vibe.”

I seat myself at my drum set and start slamming the sticks down on the drums. It’s the same song we just made, but I love the beat so much I can’t get it out of me.

It’s the same song I was tapping out on my leg and humming last week on the way to the shoot.

I liked the beat then and showed it to the girls today and they built on it from there.

I slam the sticks down on the cymbals in excess, loving the sound.

I twirl the sticks around my fingers when the parts of the song where the drums are silent come and then slam the sticks back down on the toms.

Aria picks up her guitar and adds to the song all while Ivory shoves handfuls of chips into her mouth. She always gets the worst munchies.

The door to our studio slams open and the sticks fall out of my hands and roll under the couch.

The doorknob leaves a dent in the wall and Harvey storms into the room with his hands balled into fists at his sides.

He looks pissed . I don’t think I’ve ever seen him so pissed.

His eyes land on mine, and the pure fury that radiates off of him in waves says it all.

He’s probably been looking for me for hours.

I smirk at how pissed he is, loving that I’m the cause, but the smirk falls when he storms over to where I sit at the set and wraps a hand around my upper arm.

He yanks me out of my seat so hard, I stumble on my feet, and he doesn’t do anything to steady me.

Instead, he screams at me, only inches away from my face, “What the fuck is wrong with you?” His voice is so dark it almost scares me. Almost.

“A lot of shit.” I laugh.

He doesn’t find me funny. “What did you take?” He demands.

I roll my eyes, but the movement feels so slow from the drugs. I laugh, “Why does it matter? I’m gonna fail your stupid ass drug test anyway and we both know it.”

He yanks me forward and I almost fall but his grip is so tight on my arm, I can’t go anywhere.

Harvey tries to drag me out of the room even though I try to pull back, but it’s no use.

He’s stronger than I am and I’m also cross faded.

My arm hurts from where he holds me and I wince, “You’re hurting me. ”

The look he gives me is menacing. “Do you have any idea what you put me through today? I had to search for you for hours. I only found you because your dumb friends posted a picture of you all here.”

Ivory sits up straight and shrieks, “We are not dumb.”

“Shut up.” He snaps at her, and she coils in on herself, closing her mouth.

“Maybe if you didn’t treat me like a prisoner I wouldn’t have run away. Besides, you have nobody to blame but yourself. Your job is to watch me, and you failed at that.” I grumble as I continue to try tugging out of his grip to no avail.

He leans in so close to my face I’m not sure if he’s gonna kiss me or scream at me, but I wouldn’t be opposed to the former. He keeps his voice low, “Well maybe if you weren’t such a fuck up, I wouldn’t have to babysit you in the first place.”

His words hit home, and I open my mouth to argue but no words come out.

He’s right. I am a fuck up. My own parents can’t stand to talk to me, they’re embarrassed by my lifestyle choices.

If it were up to my dad, I’d be working a boring nine to five office job in finance, crunching numbers all day and wishing for something more.

My parents unofficially disowned me once I decided not to go to college.

Aria and I spend holidays with Ivory’s family and sometimes I fly to Florida to visit my brother, but otherwise, I’m all alone.

I’m all alone because I’m the biggest fuck up the world has ever seen and what’s crazy about it is that I. Keep. Fucking. Up. I just can’t stop.

Harvey drags me out of the studio, his grip never loosening on my arm.

Not even when we take the elevator three floors down to the lobby.

He doesn’t release me until we’re at his sleek black BMW and he shoves me into the passenger seat.

I cross my arms over my chest and rest my forehead against the glass, allowing the coolness of the window to seep into my skin and calm my nerves.

It starts to rain and drops drip down the windshield.

I watch on the sidewalk as people start to hurry their steps, hoping to get to their destinations before they get too wet from the rain.

Harvey drops into the driver’s seat and speeds off, cutting in and out of traffic and driving like a mad man.

The anger is still washing off of him in waves and I get why he’s angry.

I would be angry too if someone went out of their way to embarrass me and make me look a fool.

I knew what I was doing when I ran away in the first place.

I knew it wouldn’t end well but I was so desperate to keep the mask on for my friends so that they wouldn’t think I’m a fuck up.

I can deal with my parents hating me, but not my friends.

I’m so afraid of them abandoning me and cutting me out because I’m not fun anymore.

I need to be Sticks and Harvey will never understand that.

My career, my friends, my fans, all of it rests on Sticks and Sticks can only be Sticks if she’s in the news for some obscene thing she did while high.

The edibles are wearing off and the sadness is seeping in, the worry with it.

Harvey doesn’t look at me once the entire way home.

Instead, he keeps his eyes glued to the road ahead, his knuckles wrapped around the wheel and turning white.

Once we finally make it home, he cuts the engine and sits still, waiting for me to make a move.

I open the door and step out, tripping over my own feet.

I’m a little dizzy from all the whiskey still, so regaining my balance takes a bit of effort, but before I can figure it out, Harvey is at my side, gripping my elbow tight but not as tight as he did before.

He leads me into the house and to my room and then turns on his heel and walks away, his heavy footsteps echoing off the walls.

His anger seems to have dissipated slightly, but I’ve come to know Harvey well and I know his silence is worse than anything.

I’ve never wanted him to yell at me so badly.

At least when he yells at me, I know he isn’t this mad.

I sigh as I drop to my mattress and roll onto my side.

Footsteps return a moment later, getting louder and louder.

Harvey steps into my room and I turn my head to find his black eyes avoiding mine.

My eyes drop to his hand next as he places a glass of water on my nightstand. “Drink that.” He commands me.

I make no move, instead staring at him, completely shocked that he’d even care enough to get me water. I thought he’d rather let me suffer and rot. The only thing convincing me that what I’m seeing is real is the fact that weed isn’t a hallucinogen. Otherwise, I wouldn’t believe this sight one bit.

His voice gets deeper, more commanding. “Now.”

I sit up slowly, reaching for the glass and bringing it to my lips.

I take a sip and then another, not realizing how thirsty I was.

I empty the glass and set it down, expecting him to leave right after but he doesn’t.

Instead, he looks at me and exhales. It almost seems like the anger is leaving his body and it’s replaced by something else but I’m not sure what.

What looks like a flash of pity runs through his eyes before he hardens his expression and furrows his brows.

“I don’t know why you do what you do and it isn’t my job to know why.

My job is to make sure you stop and that’s what I’m gonna do.

” He turns to leave but stops at the door.

He looks at me over his shoulder. “You’re so self destructive and you don’t even realize it.

” He leaves, closing the door behind himself and leaving me encased in darkness.

I curl in on myself, hugging my knees to my chest as sleep slowly sinks its claws into me and pulls me under the surface and into the abyss.