Page 75 of The Love Bus
(NOT) A WALKING DISASTER
T he phone started ringing just as I merged onto the highway. And for a split second, my heart leapt into my throat.
More than anything, I wanted to tell Noah about… all of it.
Somewhere along the way, that urge had become automatic. A ridiculous flutter every time my screen lit up, like maybe, just maybe, it would be him.
Ashley’s name flashed across the display.
I couldn’t avoid talking to her forever.
In fact, I didn’t want to avoid my sister anymore. Exhaling, I forced the tightness in my chest to settle and tapped the hands-free button on the steering wheel.
“Hey, Ash…”
“She lives!” Ashley teased, her voice warm but a little tentative. “You’ve been kind of…ghosting me.”
“I know.” I sighed. “I’m sorry.”
There was a pause, but not an uncomfortable one.
“So,” she said gently, “how’d the meeting go? I wish you would’ve at least talked to Beckett’s lawyer. Steve’s one of the top?—”
“I didn’t need Steve,” I cut in sharply. “I’m okay. Really,” I added, softening a little. “You and Beckett…you do so much. For all of us. But honestly? I’ve got this handled.”
I went quiet for a second, watching the road in front of me. Then I gave her a quick, clipped version of the meeting—the boardroom, the apology, the contract, the settlement.
“You’re kidding.”
“Nope.” Honestly, it all still felt more than a little surreal.
Ashley fell silent, and then, “Mom’ll be glad to hear that. She was so worried when Babs…when she saw those pictures of you with your hot doctor. With the meltdown on the show and everything.”
That… It just hit wrong.
“I’m human, Ash,” I said. “But the show ending…that wasn’t all my fault.”
It came out shaky, but firm. I didn’t second-guess it, not anymore.
“The thing is,” I kept going when Ashley didn’t say anything, “I’ve been feeling guilty.
About all of it. And maybe I should feel a little guilty.
I ignored red flags with Leo. I let him bulldoze me.
I stuck my head in the sand longer than I should’ve.
And yeah, I probably could’ve handled finding out about the cheating a little better.
But Ashley, something needed to happen. I stayed so long because… I was afraid of leaving.”
I swallowed hard at the realization.
“I didn’t want to disappoint everyone.” Mom. Ashley. The people who depended on the show at the station. “But…I was…losing myself.” I paused, gripping the wheel tighter. “And everything I’d been feeling. I think it just exploded. And…it needed to happen.”
Another breath. Because I needed to get this out.
“Mom hated the fact that I didn’t want to go to college. I always knew that. But despite what everyone thinks, I’m not some sort of rebel. I’m just…trying to be me.”
“Oh, Luna.”
“It’s fine, Ash. But you guys need to trust me. And Mom needs to stop treating me like I’m on the brink of self-destruction. ‘Cause you know what? The ending of that show…it was a good thing . And from here on out, I’m totally owning it.”
Ashley didn’t say anything right away.
When she did, she sounded tired, but not unkind.
“Good for you. I mean it. I just want you to be happy. But Luna?”
“Yeah?”
“The stuff with Mom. You need to talk to her about that. I can’t play go-between anymore. I’ve got…my own stuff to deal with.”
Something in her voice made me pause.
“Mom does not think you’re self-destructing,” she added. “At least, she doesn’t mean to. But you shut her out. And when she tries to fix things, the two of you just…make…ugh.”
I turned into the neighborhood, slowing down as I got closer to my mom’s house
“You’re right,” I said quietly. “I’ll talk to her. I promise.”
There was a pause.
Then I said, “Ashley?”
“Yeah?”
“Are you okay?”
There was a beat. Then a sigh. “Yeah,” she said. “I’m fine.”
I nodded, even though she couldn’t see me. “I’ll talk to her,” I said again, more firmly this time. “Tonight.”
“Okay.”
“Thanks, Ash.”
“Love you, Looney.”
“Love you too.”
The call ended.
I sat in the driveway for a moment, the engine idling.
I wasn’t sure if I was ready for a conversation with my mom.
But Ash was right. And honestly, sometimes you just have to take the bull by the horns.
Or, you know…toss the lobster salad and deal with the fallout.
It was time to remind everyone—including myself—that I wasn’t just picking up the pieces anymore.
I was ready to move forward.
I turned off the ignition and stepped out into the sunlight.