Page 39 of The Lies of Lena (The Otacian Chronicles #1)

Chapter Thirty-Eight

SILAS

“ Y ou look exhausted,” Era murmured when we entered our quarters, brushing my hair out of my face. “I was wondering when you’d return.”

“Exhausted is an understatement.”

Erabella had traveled with me and my men to Fort Laith; otherwise, it would’ve been months until we’d see each other again.

“You kept me waiting long enough.”

“Forgive me,” I whispered, kissing her softly. “You wouldn’t have enjoyed seeing me as filthy as I was.”

She chuckled. “That’s true. I am happy to see you’re at least cleaned up.” Her smile faltered. “How did it all go? Did you lose anyone? And what’s this I hear about Edmund?”

I sighed as I grazed my hands along her arms. “We lost just over forty. It would have been less had the Undead not attacked us. ”

Her eyes widened. “The Undead!” she exclaimed, her hands flying to her cheeks. I nodded and she shook her head. “I don’t want you on these missions anymore, Silas. I do not care what your father says. The Undead are too dangerous for you to be putting yourself at risk.”

“What kind of leader would I be if I sent my men on a journey that I would not venture on myself?”

She frowned. “A leader that is alive .”

I groaned, then gave her a soft smile. “You always know what to say, don’t you?”

She grinned and kissed me.

Her lips didn’t soothe me how they normally did. I was still incredibly tense from everything that happened.

“I need another shower—need to clear my head,” I said as I gestured to our master bath.

She nodded, and as I began to walk away, she asked, “Who was that woman you were interrogating?”

I tensed at those words and was grateful my back was to her. “Their leader.” I went for our dresser to grab a towel and some clothes to lounge in.

“I thought it was an older man?”

“A lot has happened. I’ll tell you more when I am done.”

She gave me another nod, and with that, I entered our bathroom.

After undressing, I stepped into the shower, the hot water relaxing my muscles. As it trickled down, I could feel my nerves starting to settle.

I tried to think of anything other than my altercation with Lena, but it wouldn’t give. Especially her eyes when I grabbed her neck. The way she looked at me…the fear in her eyes. She looked at me like I was a monster.

It was not an incorrect assumption. I am certainly nothing like the man she knew. Not even close. Still, I should have never put my hands on her.

I ran my hands through my hair, shampoo bubbles dripping down my body.

She called me Quill… cried that name as if reaching for the person I used to be. My whole body went numb at the sound of it leaving her lips. She truly believed that version of me still existed.

I am sure she believes that no longer.

I began to think of those tears in her eyes and how I couldn’t even look at her face when Era showed up. I wanted to hurt her, yet I didn’t have the balls to even see her reaction.

My thoughts drifted to how she must be feeling sitting in that cold cell, and I felt a tightness in my chest.

I didn’t know how I fucking felt. Every good thing about me was destroyed a long, long time ago. But the thought of her crying and scared just shattered what little was left of my heart.

She is a witch. She lied about who she was the entire time.

I sighed, my conflicting thoughts eating me alive.

Yes, but I did, too. Had she not followed me to the castle and found out who I really was after being captured, I’m not sure when I would’ve told her my secret.

What was I going to do? I needed that information if there was any hope of us finding the large group of Mages and stopping the Weapon said to destroy our kingdom. But I would never torture it out of Lena like I had with others of her kind. I just couldn’t .

I also couldn’t let her die. Despite what she was, she was one of the only good things that had ever happened to me. The years with her were the happiest of my life.

Perhaps that made me weak.

I took my time showering, my thoughts a jumbled mess. When I was finally finished, I wrapped a towel around my waist. I made sure to put on a white cotton sweater, something comfortable to sleep in, to hide my back—the place I never let anyone see, not even Era.

When I walked out of the bathroom and into the room, Erabella was laying on the bed naked, giving me a wicked grin.

My cock hardened underneath the towel, and I returned the facial expression. Then, almost instantly, guilt washed over me.

The love of my life was alive. She was alive and alone. It was hard enough moving on when I thought she was dead, but now that I knew she was alive, I just felt sick.

Era noticed the change in my expression. “What’s wrong?” she asked softy as she sat up. “The shower didn’t help?”

I exhaled through my nose. “Just…a long fucking day.”

She patted the spot next to her on the bed, and I sat down beside her. She gently ran her hands across my back over my shirt and began to knead my shoulders. I hissed from the pleasure it brought me.

“I’m happy you’re here,” I whispered.

She kissed my cheek and skimmed her hand down my chest, then grabbed my length under the towel, causing me to inhale sharply.

“Have you missed me as much as I missed you?” she purred.

Fuck.

I twirled around and cupped her face in my hands, kissing her passionately .

“Let me make you feel good,” she offered softly and hopped off the bed to kneel before me. Grinning, she removed the towel, took me into her mouth, and began to suck.

My head rolled back, and I let out a groan while running my hand through her hair, gripping her tight.

I can’t think about Lena. Not now. I’m a married man.

But I couldn’t stop myself from thinking of her lips, her eyes, her voice. Even those pointed ears of hers.

And I felt guilty for that, too.

I couldn’t sleep. After Era and I had sex, she passed out next to me, her short blonde hair lying cutely on her face. She looked so sweet when she slept, a contrast to her normal appearance of seductress. Her almond eyes always caught the attention of other men, but I didn’t mind. Her eyes never wandered.

I rubbed my temples.

But mine did. Not after other women—I was always loyal to Erabella, even though my sexually depraved years prior to our marriage would sometimes cross my mind. No, the only other woman I had ever thought of was Lena.

I bit my knuckle, resting my elbows on my knees while contemplating my fucked-up life as I sat in bed.

I scared the shit out of Lena. Let her see a sliver of the monster I had become. I put my hand on her throat. I was so damn furious with her and all I wanted in that moment was to make her hurt like she had hurt me.

Honestly, what I did scared the shit out of me, too.

I sighed heavily and hopped out of bed, careful not to disturb Era. I threw on black trousers and a clean pair of boots.

I needed to tell her I was sorry. I didn’t care if it made me a pussy. I would still get that information somehow. But I would not hurt her.

I quietly left my room, being mindful while softly shutting the door, and began my descent into the prison.

Sconces scarcely lit up the spiral staircase, and the temperature began to dip the closer to the bottom I got. I made it halfway down before I began to hear screaming.

A woman’s voice…what the fuck is going on?

Hurriedly, I ran down the remaining steps and followed the noise as the woman’s cries grew louder.

I reached the cell where the screams were coming from and flung open the door.

My eyes felt like they were going to bulge out of my head. Rurik, Jones, Daerin, and Geoff were towering over Lena. Her pants had been ripped off, her top torn in half, exposing her breasts. And Rurik—

He was raping her.

Her eyes met mine, a look of terror and streams of tears pouring out of her swollen eyes. Blood was flowing out of her nose.

I felt an anger in me, darker, more vicious than I ever had before.

“Get the fuck off her!” I shouted as I ran forward. “OFF! NOW!”