Page 68 of The Last Safe Place

The three of them walked into the small living room, where Michaela finally had the opportunity to greet her sister-in-law.

“It’s good to see you.” She meant it, even if she’d have preferred to say goodbye by telephone.

“I’ve brought something for you.”

“Oh, that really wasn’t necessary.” Michaela would have preferred money to a gift. Whatever Carola gave them, it was unlikely they’d be allowed to take it with them, because their luggage list had already been stamped, and their suitcases were sealed.

“Don’t be silly. I’m not going to let you disappear without a gift.” Carola nodded in the direction of her oversized travel bag and said to Ilse, “Open up!”

Seconds later, there was an “Oh,” as Ilse gasped her delight, before carefully carrying a deliciously fragrant apple cake to the table.

“I saved my sugar rations. The apples are from my garden.”

“I miss snacking on your fruit so much,” said Eva, standing beside Ilse and not letting the cake out of her sight for a second.

Michaela clapped her hands. “How lovely! Thank you so much, Carola. Let’s eat the cake right away. I’ll make coffee. Eva, while I do that, can you set the table?”

Eva pulled a face, but set to work. A short time later, they were chatting over coffee and cake.

“What will happen to the house?” asked Carola, who had grown up here together with Dieter.

Michaela took another forkful of cake to quell the pangs of conscience. The delicious sweet and sour apple filling melted on her tongue. “I’m so sorry, I would have loved to leave the house to you, but it wasn’t permitted. It goes to the German Reich.” That was the official version, since she wasn’t allowed to reveal that she’d been obliged to turn over all her assets to the Abwehr to pay at least a portion of the one-hundred-thousand-dollar deposit required for their entry permits to Switzerland.

“There’s no need to feel guilty, I have my own little house.” Carola smiled bravely, despite the tears of nostalgia in her eyes.

“I’m sorry,” Michaela murmured, struggling with her own emotions. She’d lived in this house with Dieter for so many years, had given birth and raised their two children, had been happy here – and this was where Dieter had died. Suddenly she was painfully aware of his presence everywhere in the house, a bond she’d soon have to give up forever.

She swallowed the lump in her throat and tried to sound optimistic. “Once the war is over, hopefully it will be returned to us,” she said with forced cheerfulness.

“I’ll look forward to your return. Until then, write to me as often as you can.”

That evening, Carola prepared to return home. Ilse threw herself into her aunt’s arms, sobbing, “I don’t want to leave, Aunt Carola. Please, why can’t I stay with you?”

Carola looked helplessly at her sister-in-law over the girl’s head. This was exactly the scene Michaela had feared, and tried to avoid, nonetheless the power of it still caught her off guard, almost tearing her heart in two. She only wanted the best for her daughters. Here in Germany, there was no future for Jews or half-breeds, but how was she supposed to explain that to a nine-year-old who was howling like an abandoned dog?

“Oh Ilse, it’s just not possible I’m afraid.”

“I don’t want to go. I’ll be really good.” Ilse sobbed.

“I don’t doubt that for a second, but that’s not the reason we have to go,” Michaela tried to reassure her daughter. “We don’t know what’s going to happen next. Hitler hates us Jews, so we’re no longer safe here. Not me and not you.”

“But Vati?—”

“Things have changed since your father died. We can’t stay; it would be extremely foolish not to seize the opportunity to leave for a neutral country.”

“But I don’t want to go to Switzerland.”

Michaela was at her wits’ end. Her daughter simply couldn’t be persuaded with reasonable arguments. Fortunately, Carola seemed to have pulled herself together in the meantime. She stroked Ilse’s hair. “Remember how you said you missed chocolate so much?”

Ilse nodded miserably.

“There’s a lot of it in Switzerland.” A glow crept into Ilse’s eyes at her aunt’s words. “Bananas and oranges too, so I hear.”

“Really?” Ilse’s sobbing died away.

“Absolutely. Will you eat one for me?”

“Oh, Aunt Carola, why don’t you just come with us?” Ilse snuggled up to her aunt.