Page 68

Three months later

Byron Bay

I t was Alex’s thirtieth birthday, and Timi was covered in yeast.

“Oooh! Is he the birthday cake?” An electronic voice cooed from the phone Alex held close to Timi's face.

Timi sent Alex a scowl for startling him and causing the yeast can he was holding to drop on him. Then eased his expression into a smile as he waved at the three people sitting at a table in Alphonso's general room. “Hi, Mrs. Fash. Mum. Mr. Fash.”

“Richard, do you bake now?” Mumsie said. “You should go back to acting.”

And for the first time, she was right. Although his baking was still limited to concocting things with flour and feeding them to his man. But as today was a special day, he was going all out and baking him a cake.

“I'm just taking after Kaka, mum,” he said, ignoring Alex's jab on his ribs at the name.

“Son, you're doing well,” Mr. Fash said. “Alex, can we get back to it?”

Timi groaned. “Haven't you all watched it enough? It's Alex's birthday. You should probably watch Terminator or something.”

“Shuuuush!” Mrs. Fash said. “Not everyone personally knows an individual who shut down a whole country for days. Alex?”

“Going,” Alex said. He ignored Timi's pout and dropped a kiss on his forehead. “Happy baking, darling.”

Soon, the television noises resumed.

…Eyi or Timi? What should we call you?

Whichever you feel like. They're both me. But my surname will always be Lawson. That's going nowhere.

Hearing of Dr Jude’s exploits, it's only fair. How do you think things would change after airing your story?

I don't know. Another lynching? Cancellation? Internet mobbing? Death threats? A warrant for my arrest? Who knows?

I see you didn't mention acceptance, or respect of choice and privacy.

I have seen it all to know that my right to life and dignity lies heavily on who fondles my genitals.

What do you have to say about people who think it isn't normal? A man can't possibly love another man the way he should love a woman .

What is love, Ify? How's love? People who can't fathom the convoluted concept of it want to tell you which direction your love must go, or what depth is acceptable.

Should we police every form of healthy love that doesn't follow the 'norm' then?

Should we question a man who loves a child more than who bore that child?

Or one who loves an animal more than his neighbour?

Why should a stranger love me more than my mother ever could? When love isn't harmful, why fight it ?

Ify, I am, therefore, I love. And I love, therefore, I am. Period.

Timi grimaced hearing that phrase.

As planned, Ify had waited until Alex joined him before she released the interview. And it was nothing like they'd expected. The response, though still largely negative, had been surprising.

A hashtag; #IamthereforeIlove.AndIlovethereforeIam.Period hit the number one spot as soon as the interview aired. Attached to personal stories from people who had either received or felt an unconventional love. The filial kind. The romantic kind. It didn't matter as long as it wasn't normal.

For days, it was all everyone could talk about. There were still death threats and a clamour for his arrest if he ever stepped foot into the country, but there were also his past crucifiers who began showing solidarity.

Timi no longer fed off on anyone's acceptance, but it was a step in the right direction. For unprivileged people who shared the same story as his.

Do you think you would regret your actions? Considering how 'hard' your love is going to be?

Never. I'll take a deep 'hard' than a shallow 'easy' any day, any time.

After all being said and done, do we get to meet your special person?

Maybe someday. But for now, all I can say is, he was my first love and my last. And if I'm reborn a thousand times, I'll continue to choose him. In whatever form he appears.

Even as a tree?

I'll be rooted right beside him, all blooming flowers, sturdy stems and bulbous roots.

A whoop travelled from the sitting room all the way down to his ears. Just how loud was Alex's phone?

You said your sexuality and relationship was private, and if you had not told us your story, no one would have known. Why come out now?

Because I was done with being threatened with a past I no longer lived in, and a present I was expected to be ashamed of.

You were threatened?

Yes. But I understand why she did it and I forgive her.

Timi sighed as he poured the batter into a pan.

He'd called Nejeere as soon as he landed and asked for an explanation.

“I heard from Dozie. You hadn't resumed your plans to disappear,” she said.

“So?”

“I couldn't let you hurt him, Timi. You may think this is me being jealous or that I want him for myself, but that's not true.

I realise now that he can never love me.

But I've known him far longer than you and I love him.

I also know you, Timi. A leopard can never change its spots.

Destroying his life for a minute of experimental pleasure is the cruellest thing you'll ever do, and I couldn't allow it.”

“So, if I hadn't left, you would have destroyed his life?”

“Timi, You're more selfish than a...fox. I knew you would save yourself.”

She finally had an animal name for him, but like all her analogies,ignorance bled through. So pitiably, the slight barely nicked him.

He still sometimes imagined her face when she found out everything. How he'd begged Alex to join him, and his baby packing up everything without a second thought. How he was to Alex what she could never be.

“Oh, man, I have a lot of work to do,” Charles said, when he called Timi. “She's actually considering returning to medical school to finally please her mother. If that doesn't spell remorse or regret, I don't know what would.”

Timi pitied her, but he wasn't buying it. “She can just call and apologise. Like a normal person.”

“Shame, man, shame. That shit fucks people up. She'll come around. When she does, you both must forgive her, or I'll cancel being your best man.”

Timi smiled. “She deleted the video. We're good. Save your threats. And guy?”

“Yeah?”

“Stop letting her slip through your fingers. ”

Charles laughed. Loud and hollow. “Try holding on to a hagfish first, my guy. I dey her corner, sha. For life.”

He volunteered to help Dozie in selling off his properties and Timi couldn't find a better person for the job.

They estimated two years, but Timi was okay with that.

Before then, Alex may have gotten a baking license, and Timi may have fully embraced a writing career.

He had the time and the money, and had D'Yoyo and Maxwell, who insisted he was too good an actor to wither away and promised to keep a spot open for him whenever he decided to come back.

What about kids?

We have thirty-seven right now. My partner and I are good.

He'd opened up to Mother Agnes before he left. She hadn't condemned him, nor had she blessed him as she promised she would if he brought his life partner to her.

“Timi, I don't have enough authority to judge the matters of the heart,” she'd said. “But I know you and Alex. Your hearts are pure and good. It would be stupid of me to think of you otherwise because you turned out different. I'll continually pray for your happiness. Both of you.”

Timi knew then, he would never ask for what he and Alex had talked about. And when Sarah and Henry clung to him, he fervently hoped they would be adopted into the right homes.

Would you be visiting Nigeria any time soon?

Honestly, I don't know. My home and my heart is with me. And to protect him, I can only be in a place where our rights as human beings won't be trampled on.

Agu had sent an inbox after the interview.

Timi read it a good number of times, an acidic weight rolling in his stomach like he'd again eaten Barramundi unknowingly. There was no simplifying how he felt about Agu. But he wished him the best, whatever that meant .

The interview video ended, the cake baked in the oven, and everyone sang a 'Happy Birthday '.

At 3:30pm, he fed Alex his delicious chocolate cake below Uncle Jude’s pencil portraiture in the living room, then took him for a stroll on his private beach.

They held hands, kicked up sand, jumped into water, and kissed.

Out there in the open, in daylight, under the blue skies, and Timi had never felt more… him.

The number three had indeed played the last lucky card.