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AIDEN

I wake the day after the pool incident with a raging hard-on that I refuse to deal with and a determination to win. At what? I don’t know. The foolish beast inside me says if I just had Emory once, I’d get her to admit she wants me and that would cool this insane, ever-growing need.

I nearly miss the note under my door in my haste to get downstairs before her.

Golden boy,

Prince Charming,

See how I’m turning over a new leaf? I’ve decided to try and be nice to you. So here’s your one fact for the day—Prince Charming is what Leo calls you when he wants to tease me.

He’s been calling you that since we were sixteen, even after the soda incident.

(Did you ever get the soda out of your loafers? The vengeful bitch inside me Inquiring minds need to know.)

Sincerely,

Evil queen

I’m grinning when I finish, and I take my time composing a reply while I do the crossword.

Wife,

You are marginally less evil than I initially believed (sorry, you probably hate that).

No, I did not get the soda out of my loafers, and I was devastated.

They were my favorite pair. I hope you feel bad for me.

Inquiring minds also want to know whether you kept those pink boots you wore that first day.

In the spirit of competition, here’s the completed crossword for the day. It took me seventeen minutes to complete.

Yours,

Prince Charming (I do like the way that sounds)

I slide the note under her door and feel lighter than I normally do while I work on the still with Tristan.

There’s another one the following morning.

Prince Charming,

Please leave me out of your foot fetish.

I laugh helplessly at that, flopping onto the bed to stare at the ceiling, feeling weak and drunk and full of air.

N ot very sporting of you to give me no facts when I gave you one. Here’s today’s completed crossword. It took me six minutes. While I’ll admit Monday is easier than Sunday, seventeen minutes is a poor showing from you.

Maybe if you spent less time thinking about feet?

- Your FAKE wife

I’m scrambling to write back before I realize what I’m doing.

Evil (you really are) queen,

You owe me more than one fact before you’ll get more from me. Cheating might work at your casino, but it won’t work with me.

I will be scrupulously timing future crosswords, and I expect you to do the same.

Yours in honesty,

Prince Charming

When I get out of the bathroom, there’s a reply.

Prince Charming,

I’ll admit I felt a frisson of something at the word scrupulously written so confidently. Perhaps it was indigestion. Have you tried annoying a woman to orgasm?

I bark a laugh at that, heat rising swiftly in my stomach.

Is she flirting with me?

I rub a hand over my jaw, not containing my smile at her annoyed tone. I think she might be flirting with me. In her own exasperated, evil queen way. I like it.

I like it so much.

Not so evil queen,

There’s a first time for everything. Are you volunteering?

Yours (no really, I am literally yours for a year),

Prince Charming