Page 9 of The Heart Of A Real Woman: Marilyn & Moses

Moses

Ever since we made shit official, we were spending even more time together.

To the point, Mary’s ass skipped a few classes here and there just to be with me.

I fussed at her about it, but I still came through to scoop her.

Even she needed a getaway from her world at times.

Her father often put a lot of pressure on her.

Besides, I wanted to spend as much time as I could with her too. She claimed I made her happy. But she made me happier. She filled me with peace…a peace I had been searching for all my life.

Today, when she skipped, I spent the few extra dollars I had on gas and took her to the beach.

Inside her backpack, she had two towels and snacks she’d snuck out of the house.

We sat in the sand chillin’, soaking in the view of the sky and the crystal blue water while music played from my phone.

It felt like the weight of the world had been lifted off my shoulders.

When I was with her, nothing else mattered.

“I like this song. The beat is nice. Who is that?” Mary asked.

“One of my niggas. He’s dope, right?”

“He is,” she nodded, bobbing her head. “A true lyricist.”

“Facts. He’s gonna go places, fasho. Just gotta get his music in the right hands.”

“It’s so hard to get discovered, though. It’s like you have to know someone, especially where we are from.”

I nodded in agreement, my plans swirling in my mind. “It’s cool. I’ma start a record label one day and put my nigga on.”

Mary raised an eyebrow, smiling. “Really? I wouldn’t have guessed that about you.”

“Yeah. I’ve been thinking hard about it.

I love music. It’s gotten me through some of my darkest times.

I’ve been figuring out how to dive into it without being an artist, and I thought I could start my own record label.

There’s so much talent in the ‘Rose. I just gotta get my money up to make it happen, so they can be given a chance, you feel me?”

“Yeah. I love that idea. You’ll make it happen.”

“You think so? Or you just hyping me up ‘cause you love me?”

She laughed as I leaned over and kissed her cheek.

“No, I know so. You don’t give yourself enough credit because you have dyslexia.

But look at you. You’re nineteen, out here alone, making it despite all the odds.

You just told me a few weeks ago you were staying in a motel, and now you’re almost ready to get your place. That’s major growth in a short time.”

“I hear you, and I appreciate your words, Shorty.”

“Always,” she said, bumping her fist with mine. “You got an old soul, Moses Mikaelson.”

I chuckled. “Where that come from?”

She laughed too, shrugging. “People say that to me all the time…tell me that I’m so mature for my age. But you’re on a whole other level. You be thinking about stuff I don’t.”

“When you grow up the way I did, you ain’t got a choice. It’s either you swim or drown. I've been drowning long enough. I gotta get it.”

We grew serious, silence wrapping around us. My words stung. I felt the ache deep, and Mary’s eyes showed she felt it too. For a while, we just listened to the waves crashing on the shore while she traced the scars on my back.

“What happened? You care to finally share that with me?”

I eyed her, hesitating. “Pops used to beat me.”

“What?”

“Yeah… but it’s cool.” I shrugged. “I’ma tattoo over it soon.”

“It’s not cool. Why the fuck would he do that?”

“Angry. Needed a fix, so he’d take that shit out on me until I was about fifteen. By then, I was damn near as tall as him. Shit flipped. He couldn’t fuck with me no more.”

She nodded, visibly hurt for me, but didn’t say anything else. We sat in silence again, but this time, I broke it.

“I wanna get full custody of my son too.” I shifted the conversation to something positive.

Mary turned to me, her eyes curious. "How come?"

"His mama ain’t ready to be a mother. He spends a lot of time with her grandmother while she runs the streets.

I ain't judging. We young. But I want my son to be raised right, you know? He deserves all the love he can get at home. I wanna give him everything I didn’t have.

That’s why I’m working hard on getting an apartment. "

"Do you think she’ll be okay with you wanting full custody, though? I mean, that’s a whole different ball game than just bringing him over to her grandmother’s place."

"We talked about it. Shaunie don’t give a fuck. She wanted him when she thought it would make me be with her. But when she realized that wouldn’t change my mind, she lost interest. Especially now that she knows we together. She hates the responsibility."

Mary nodded. "Wow."

"Wow, what?"

"I couldn’t imagine doing something like that. Whenever I become a mother, my kid will be attached to my hip, whether I’m with the father or not. But hey, to each their own."

I bobbed my head, feeling a twinge of jealousy. "You mean whether you with me or not."

She smiled. “Of course. You know what I mean.”

“You don’t ever have to worry about that, though, ‘cause you ain’t going nowhere. You a fool if you ever think I’m comin’ off you.”

“Look at you, all possessive. Just a few weeks ago, you didn’t even want me like that.”

She laughed, but I didn’t. That shit wasn’t funny to me.

“I always wanted you,” I made clear to her. “Just afraid you’ll stop wanting me when you go off to college and see something better.”

She leaned in and kissed my lips. “Stop it. I’ll always want you. Ain’t no one better, baby. I told you that.”

I nodded. “But how do you feel about that?"

"About what?"

"About my son living with me full-time. You think you could handle that being my girl?"

“I think it’s beautiful that you want him with you and want to give him a better life. I won’t lie to you, though. The situation makes me nervous. I mean, I’ve fed and changed the babies in my family, but I don’t know anything about taking care of a baby full time—”

“Don’t be nervous. I’m not asking you to do nothin’ full-time. I know he’s my responsibility.” I cut her off.

“And I know that. Let me finish.” She said, cutting her eyes at me.

“But he’s a part of you, so it doesn’t matter how nervous it makes me. I’d love to get to know him and learn how to help you take care of him. I can pitch in even more when I come home from college for breaks.”

“Cool. Just let me get this place, and I’ll make arrangements for you to meet him."

“Okay,” she kissed my lips before reaching for the food. “Here,” she said, handing me a turkey sandwich and a bag of chips.

“Nah, baby. You eat both. I’m good,” I told her with pride, knowing I planned to have her out for a few hours and didn’t have any more money to spare for food.

That made me feel small too. Even as a young nigga, I wanted to be able to give her the world. But I had to give my son the world as well. I couldn’t afford to be reckless with my money.

“I can’t eat both. One is enough for me.”

I still wasn’t budging. “I’m straight.”

“You haven’t eaten. You need to.”

“I’m more concerned about you. I don’t bring you back to school until 4. I wanna make sure you’re not hungry.” I glanced at the clock on my phone.

“I won’t be. Eat . I packed extra for you.” She pulled out more snacks, shit that she had learned was my favorite.

When I still didn’t budge, Mary cupped my chin with those magical ass hands of hers, turning me to face her. With my eyes low, I stared into hers. I didn’t know what had me feeling higher, the blunt I’d just smoked or her stunning face. I swear, her beauty took my fucking breath away.

“Don’t be like that. You put gas in your car for us to get all the way out here, and I got us on food. You need to eat. I know you haven’t.”

I ran my hand over my head, feeling frustrated. She was right. I hadn’t eaten since last night. The truth was, I was starving, but my pride wouldn’t let me take from her. I had made a little money the night before, but when it came into my hands, it was already accounted for.

I had to get my son the things he needed since his mom was too lazy to even apply for assistance.

I set some aside for savings to get an apartment, covered my room fee, and kept a few dollars to get some roses and gas, knowing the beach was about an hour away.

Mary had begged me to go, and I wasn’t about to let her down.

I had shown up at her school with flowers, ready to whisk her away.

“Please,” She grabbed my hand and placed the sandwich in it, insisting I eat.

We didn’t go back and forth after that. I did it because she begged me to, and I didn’t like the sound of that. She’d never have to plead with me for shit.

After we finished eating, we walked along the beach, sharing more of our dreams and goals.

Mary had told me a while back that she wanted to be either a forensic analyst or a forensic accountant.

Two completely different paths, but she took the time to break down why both piqued her interest. And see, that was that shit.

I ain’t never met nobody who wanted to do something like that before.

Shorty was so different from the other chicks I had fucked with.

I knew she was smart enough to do anything she wanted, so I told her she could do both. She laughed like I was trippin’, but I was dead serious. I believed in her just as much as she believed in me.

By the time we made it back to our side of town, we had about two more hours to spare, so we headed to my room.

I had upgraded to a hotel in a better area, which was why a nigga was really stretching thin on money.

Shit cost more, but it was worth it. Not only did I have my son to think about, but I also had Mary chillin’ with me whenever she could get away.

I couldn’t have her laid up with me at the old spot, where a bunch of prostitutes and drug addicts were lurking around.