Page 199 of The Fall

“Tell me what you need,” he whispers. “I want to give you everything.”

Our noses brush; his gaze locks on mine, ocean-blue darkened to midnight.

“I want you to make love to me,” I breathe.

Blair’s breath catches. “Torey.” My name breaks from his lips.

His body shifts over mine, skin against skin, every point of contact burning. The kiss breaks only when we both need air, and he rests his forehead against mine, breathing hard.

He moves above me, shifting onto one elbow while his free hand slides down my side. He kisses me again, softer. His tongue finds the seam of my mouth and slips inside, claiming, tasting, coaxing out a moan. His cock hardens against my thigh.

He starts a slow crawl down the bed, kissing my chest, his tongue flicking out to taste sweat and salt across my skin. I arch up into him. Goosebumps rise along my inner thighs where his breath ghosts over me. He slides his hands beneath my ass, lifting me onto his lap and wrapping my legs around his hips.

My cock is hard and aching. He wraps one broad palm around it and strokes. I gasp, soundless at first, until I’m shuddering.

His tongue swirls around the head of my cock before he sucks me deeper. He looks up at me from between my thighs, his lips sealed around my cock. Moonlight paints sharp edges across his cheekbones, turns the blue of his eyes to liquid silver. He takes me deeper, his lips sliding along my shaft.

I gasp, and I fist my hands in the sheets beneath me. “Your mouth feels so good.” He knows every inch my body better than I do.

One of his hands releases its grip on me to slide down and cup my balls, gently rolling them between his fingers. I pant as he takes me deeper, as he reaches for the nightstand without looking away and grabs our bottle of lube.

“Please,” I breathe.

The snap of the cap echoes in the quiet room as he coats his fingers. A tremor runs through me as he captures my lips once more. His kiss is deep and drugging, stoking the flames within me higher and higher.

He strokes my inner thigh. “Torey…” He strokes me so gently, then pushes a single finger inside me.

The stretch is a shock, a burning stretch that makes me bite down on my lower lip. But Blair is so slow, impossibly patient. He stays still until I relax around him.

Is this my first time? I’ve dreamed of being with Blair so many times that this is a homecoming, the moves already burned into my muscles, my exhales and inhales already tuned to his. He is the only man I’ve ever kissed, or ever blown, or ever gone to bed with.

I have never made love to a man—not yet.

But I have craved this so deeply and so loudly inside myself that half the wounds I’ve had to stitch closed in my soul havecome from loving and craving him too much. He doesn’t know he’s the only man I’ve ever kissed, and I only know how to touch him because of my dreams about our life that never existed.

This is the truth: he is my first, my only, my always. He is teaching my body a language I’ve only ever dreamed of speaking.

There is no other way to love him. Blair was always meant to break over me, his waves scouring my soul, tearing at my shorelines and rebuilding me. He finds me, and he builds me, and he remakes me, every damn time.

I shudder through a burning wave of pleasure, moan out his name. He kisses me through every shift and twitch, peppering my jawline, my cheekbone, my eyelids when they flutter shut.

He adds a second finger after what feels like forever.

When he slides a third finger in, I roll my hips into his hand and groan. The fullness is overwhelming, strange and perfect at once.

“Okay?” His voice is low against the shell of my ear.

“Perfect,” I whisper back.

I run my hands up his arms, over the hard muscle under hot skin. His body is tense; he’s holding back for me.

“I’m not going to break,” I tell him. “Don’t hold back.”

He studies my face, searching. Whatever he sees there makes him nod. “Tell me if it’s too much,” he says.

I push up to kiss him, catching his bottom lip between my teeth. “It won’t be.”

He moves deeper, stretching me further. I grip his shoulders, my breathing going shallow fast.