Page 54 of The Dysfunctional Family's Guide to Murder

Shoes laced, he stands. “You’re not up to anything, right?” he asks, which I guess I can’t really be mad about.

“What would I be up to?”

“If I knew that, I wouldn’t be asking.”

“Dad, I have period cramps. That’s it.”

“Okay. I believe you.”

“Thank you.”

“I’ll lock GG’s room just in case.” He clearly doesn’t know thatIknow there’s no lock on GG’s door.

“Knock yourself out.”

The bath is running and I’m lighting a candle I found in the cupboard (it’s the little details that make a good lie) when Dylan finds me in the bathroom.

“Job done.”

“Afamily walk? It’s a bit too wholesome to be believable, isn’t it?”

“Mum and I go for walks at home all the time,” he says defensively.

“Sorry. I’m just on edge.” I set the now-lit candle beside the bath and admire my handiwork.

“Are you seriously not going to tell me where you think the box is?”

“I’ll explain after.”

“Comeon.I’m your co-conspirator. The Ken to your Barbie.”

“Have you even seen that movie?”

“Just tell me.”

“There’s no time.”

As if to underline my point, someone knocks on the door. “I’m in here!” Dylan and I chorus together. Then we catch each other’s eyes and crack up, releasing tension in our giddy, hiccupping laughter.

“Is it bad that I’m kind of enjoying this?” Dylan asks.

“Which part?”

“The scheming. What do you think could be in the box? I hope it’s a pile of money and we’ll all be rich.”

“You think it’s money?”

“Maybe.”

“Why?”

“Why not? Stop trying to burst my bubble.”

“What would you even do with untold riches?”

“Travel the world? Buy a car? Pay for college so I don’t wind up with a massive debt?” He nods at the door. “We’d better get out there before they think we’re being inappropriate in here.”

I ignore the blush creeping up my neck and ears. “We’re basically cousins now—don’t be gross.”