Page 22

Chapter

Twenty-Two

The Outlaws won both games on Saturday, which meant they were heading to the championship Sunday afternoon. As fantastic as that was, it threw a wrench into our party plans. None of the players were allowed out past eight, per their coach’s rules. When I tried to convince Maddie to see if she had any sway with her stepbrother, her cheeks had flushed so pink, I wondered if she could give Rudolph a run for his money.

As we strolled across campus, Crystal turned to us with a mischievous grin. "Sooo, my roomie's having this epic bash at a friend’s place off campus. And I may have heard through the grapevine that a certain Outlaw or two might make an appearance?—”

“What? Hockey players breaking their coach’s rules?” Maddie feigned shock and awe.

Maddie pursed her lips, considering. "What kind of party? Is this going to be “everyone’s having sex on the available surfaces” or actual fun?"

Crystal laughed. "Only one way to find out." She turned to me, her eyes hopeful.

"Alright, alright, I’ll go to your sex party."

Crystal let out a whoop and dragged us off to her place to get ready. We raided her closet, swapping outfits and giggling like schoolgirls.

"Oh hey, I meant to ask," I said, touching up my lipgloss. "What's the deal with you and number twelve?"

"Ooh, yeah!" Maddie perked up. "You were all up in that cafeteria tray."

Crystal ducked her head, fighting back a smile. "His name's Jake.”

“Jaaake,” Maddie said seductively, and Crystal laughed. “Let me guess, he’s going to be at this party?”

Crystal shrugged. “I may have told him about it.”

Ah. So that’s what this is about. She needed wingwomen.

Maddie clicked her tongue. “I’m all in as long as I don’t see your thong.”

Crystal turned and pulled down her pants. I tried to slap her bare cheek, but she ducked away just in time.

We finished getting ready, and by the time we arrived at the party, we were riding a giddy high that had nothing to do with the vodka sodas we'd sampled before we left Crystal’s. Maddie offered to be the DD, and I gratefully took her up on it.

The house was packed wall to wall. Bass thumped through the floorboards as sweaty bodies writhed to the beat. I spotted some familiar faces from the hockey teams milling about, red Solo cups in hand.

We waded into the fray, letting the music pulse through us. Crystal made a beeline for Jaaake almost immediately, and as I shimmied my way through the crowd, I nearly collided with someone. "Oops, sor—" I started to say, then did a double take. "Lily?"

Sure enough, there was Lily, an all-around goody two shoes, looking decidedly out of her element.

"Sharla, hi!" She grabbed my arm and pulled me to the wall. "This is insane."

I grinned. "No offense, but . . . what are you doing here? Didn't think this was really your scene."

She shrugged, a little self-consciously. "Oh, well . . . It's senior year. Figured I ought to get the full college experience before I graduate. Live a little, right?"

Her words struck a chord, plucking strings that had no business being touched. “Exactly.” I pulled her into a hug, then walked into the next room, searching for a quiet corner. Preferably with no couch sex.

I wasn’t any better than Lily. She was tied to her violin, but I was tied to Logan. I’d started to realize it at the pancake breakfast, but now the truth of it hummed within me. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to give some things up for him. I was happy to. That’s what relationships were. But having him gone was shining light on just how much I’d sacrificed. It was like wiping layers of dust off an old photograph and not recognizing the face underneath.

All of that discomfort propelled me to the kitchen. I wasn’t normally a drinker. I had a sip every once in a while, but I didn’t love the pounding headache and roiling stomach the morning after. Even that wasn’t enough to stop me now. I grabbed two beers and found Maddie, sticking close since Crystal was in a deep conversation with number twelve.

We kept our eyes on her, making sure she never left the public spaces. That she didn’t put her drink down or leave it unattended. She didn’t know we were overbearing parents, and that was exactly how we wanted it.

As the night wore on, the party kicked into high gear. The smell of weed wafted in from the patio, and I saw at least three pills exchange hands. I wanted to slap some sense into the guys and girls who accepted them. We’d seen two friends fail out of Douglas because of that shit.

I hadn’t planned on dancing, but when Janet Jackson came on, I took Lily’s advice. I was going to live in the moment—do what I wanted to do. Logan didn’t dance, and I would never force him. But if he wasn’t there, nothing was keeping me from enjoying myself.

I pulled Maddie out with me, and we joined the group gyrating in the middle of the living area. I felt the beat, moving my hips and laughing when I nearly dropped my half-empty beer bottle.

The lights moved over us, making Maddie’s hair look purple. “It’s a good look!” I shouted over the bass. Maddie laughed and spun, and by the end of the song, we were somehow separated by two guys I hadn’t seen before.

“Hey.” One of them leaned in, putting his hand on my waist, and rolling his hips into me. We moved together for a full three measures before I realized what was happening.

My heart raced. I didn’t want to be a jerk, but I also didn’t want this guy’s hands all over me. “Hey, I actually?—”

“Piss off.” Someone pushed between us, rolling me away from random dude and against his chest.

I looked up and nearly dropped my beer a second time. “Rob?”

"Hey." His hands were still on my hips, and for a second, that was all I could feel. My hearing dulled, and my vision blurred, my brain only taking input from those two points of contact.

I swayed on my feet, and Rob steadied me. “You’re going to be in so much trouble.”

Rob stood there, his dark hair tousled and his eyes hooded. “Are you going to tattle?”

I blinked up at him, my head suddenly fuzzy enough, I wondered if I was on beer number four. Familiar voices blasted over the speaker. “I Swear” started, and everyone coupled up, swaying together to the a cappella intro.

“I didn’t need your help,” I snapped, starting to pull away, but Rob’s fingertips pressed into the small of my back. His hands were so big, they reached that far. I wondered if I’d ever known that before.

He started moving, swaying from side to side, pulling me with him. “Just like you didn’t need help in the courtyard?”

My eyes flashed. “That was different.”

“This could’ve been different.” He dropped his head, his lips brushing my ear. “It’s like you’re looking for trouble.”

I barked a laugh. “Oh, you mean because I have a vagina?” The couple next to us glanced over. Said that louder than I intended.

“Because you’re dancing like you want something.” Rob’s hand shifted, sliding across the bare strip of skin above my jeans. Heat pulsed through me, making my whole body feel weighted. That, combined with the angelic voice of Nathan Morris, made it impossible for me to be pissed off.

“Well, I don’t. Want anything.” My voice wavered, and he blew out a breath. Before he could say something else to knock me off balance, I asked, “Why are you here?”

“Couldn’t sleep.” His answer was instantaneous.

“Nervous?”

He pulled back to look at me, and I realized one of my hands was around his waist, the other against his chest, still clutching my beer. How had that happened?

“For tomorrow?” He frowned. “No.”

I pursed my lips, swallowing hard. “Then why can’t you sleep?”

He gave me a look. Because I was lonely. Because I was worried about you. Because I missed you. My heart ratcheted up another notch as those phrases echoed in my head.

Where the hell had those come from? Not true. Any of them. I was tipsy and making up ridiculous stories.

“Amped up, I guess.”

I exhaled, my insides caving in on themselves. Rob didn’t say anything else, and I couldn’t think of a response. I took a swig from my beer and cleared my throat. “I leave on Monday.”

“Yeah. Me, too.”

“So, how are you going to do it?”

He frowned. “Do what?”

“Give me my answers.”

He blew out a breath. “One track mind.”

“You could just answer me. Then I won’t bug you about it.”

His fingers pressed into my back, pulling me closer. My cheek rested on his shoulder involuntarily. “I’ll email you.”

My eyelids drooped. “You don’t have my email.”

“Yes, I do.”

My brows furrowed. “Since when?”

“Since you put it on our emergency contact list.”

I pulled back, my eyes wide. “You actually looked at that?” He nodded, and I thumped my beer hand against his chest. “You mocked me for that. Said it was a stupid idea.”

“I looked at it. I didn’t say it wasn’t stupid.”

My jaw dropped, but before I could call him a name, he reached up and brushed my hair from my forehead, and all thoughts evaporated.

“Did you put my pager number on there?” he asked.

I shook my head. “No, why?”

He wet his lips, and my gaze snagged on that quick flick of his tongue. “How did you know it? To phone when we were in Leduc?”

I opened my mouth and then snapped it closed. He watched me, his eyes drinking in every shadow from the room. Just say it . “It’s an easy number so it stuck in my head.”

My tongue wouldn’t work. Because that wasn’t the truth. Yes, it was an easy number, but I’d run it through my thoughts like salt water taffy. Pulling it, stretching it. I’d wanted that number, and by the look on his face, he knew it.

The song ended and we stood in front of each other, oblivious to the people moving around us.

“I’m going to head home,” Rob said. “I can give you a ride.”

I thought about walking out with him. Climbing in his truck. Riding with him in silence. Walking into our house together— “I'll probably stay out with Crystal and Maddie. She’s our DD. Wouldn’t want her to sacrifice for nothing."

Rob's nostrils flared. “How long are you going to stay out?”

I shrugged, folding my arms over my chest. “As long as Crystal and Maddie want to stay.”

Rob clenched his jaw. “You’re not a partier.”

That set my teeth on edge. “Maybe I am.”

He steered me to the side of the room, his hand wrapped around my upper arm. “Do you need attention? Is that it?”

My eyes flashed, and I poked a finger into his chest. “I’m allowed to have a night out. To let loose. I just finished finals, and I’ve only had a little to drink.” I brandished my beer bottle.

He looked like he wanted to argue, but then he just shook his head, his lips twisting into a wry smile. "Whatever you say."

“Yeah. It is whatever I say.”

Rob held my gaze long enough that my insides started to liquefy, then turned and walked away, disappearing into the crowd of sweaty, drunken bodies. I watched him go, my heart still racing and my mind whirling with questions.

What the hell was that all about?

When he disappeared down the hall, I pushed my way through the crowd, searching for Crystal and Maddie. The air was thick with the scent of humans and alcohol. I found them near the makeshift bar, laughing and flirting with a group of guys who were probably friends with number twelve.

Crystal caught my eye and waved me over, her cheeks flushed and her eyes bright with excitement. "Shar! There you are! We were just about to do a round of shots. You in?"

I hesitated, the rational part of my brain telling me to slow down, to be careful. But the alcohol coursing through my veins made everything seem fuzzy and distant.

"Sure, why not?" I heard myself say, grabbing a shot from the table. We clinked glasses and tossed back the liquid, the burn of the alcohol making me cough and sputter. Crystal laughed and slapped me on the back.

The rest of the party passed in a blur of laughter, dancing, and increasingly drunken antics. I spotted two guys shotgunning beers on the porch while a group of girls played a sloppy game of strip poker in the living room. Someone turned on a karaoke machine at one point, but I was definitely not drunk enough to take a turn at the mic.

By the time Maddie, Crystal, and I stumbled out the door at four in the morning, I had a throbbing headache and a rip in my shirt. Zero idea how that happened. We piled into Maddie’s car, and she didn’t bother driving us home.

We crashed at her place, and I didn't wake until well past noon, my head pounding and my mouth dry as a desert. Groaning, I pried my eyes open to find Maddie already up and dressed, holding out a bottle of water and some ibuprofen.

"Rise and shine," she said with a grin. "Let's get you home so you can finish packing. We need to head to the rink soon."

The rink? I blinked, pressing the tips of my fingers to my temples.

Maddie read my thoughts. “The championship game, babe. Just go pee. We can discuss glitter eye shadow and body paint on the way over.”