Page 52 of The Bodyguard and the Alpha (Witch Twins #2)

The words blurred in front of me, and a tear dropped onto the page.

I sobbed silently, not wanting Bastien to wake.

I gave myself five minutes. Five minutes to let it all out.

All my anger that we’d wasted so much time.

All my fear of how it could all go wrong.

All my despair. Then, I straightened, wiping my eyes.

I’d waited for this man for five years. There was no fucking way I was going to lose him now. There had to be a way.

I didn’t sleep anymore that night. Instead, I spent the time forming and discarding plans.

Maybe I was overreacting. It was possible that we could sweep the whole consent issue under the rug. It had been obvious to Caly that something was wrong, but she wouldn’t talk. Her guards didn’t know me well and it was possible they hadn’t noticed how I froze up. We could still be in the clear.

Or perhaps Bastien would come to his senses and dissolve the bond himself, before any further questions were asked. That thought lodged under my breastbone like a shard of ice, making it hard to breathe. It would make the most sense.

But if he wouldn’t let me go and questions were asked. My eyes returned to the words, looking for something… anything that could help.

Wait. There was a footnote about delay. It referenced a different chapter. My hands fumbled the pages.

The cross reference was to a chapter about pregnancy. I couldn’t imagine how that was relevant.

The words swam in front of my eyes. On top of my emotional disarray I was exhausted. Did it mean what I thought it meant?

If the mate was pregnant. My nails dug into my palms, trying to make myself focus.

A bond between a Shifter and his mate would not be dissolved if the mate was pregnant.

It wasn’t a solution. If worst came to worst, it was only a temporary reprieve, a suspension of the death Order until after the baby was born, but it was something.

If we couldn’t get out of hot water any other way, it would give us nine months to work out a solution. Not that I would wait that long.

I hunched over, wrapping my arms around my legs, dropping my head to my knees as I sorted through my chaotic thoughts. Could I do this? Should I do this? Did I want a baby?

The last question was the easiest to answer. It was a resounding hell yes. I wanted a baby… Bastien’s baby, with a frightening intensity.

And I could do it, I could definitely do it. It wouldn’t be hard to disrupt the little plastic implant.

But should I do it? And should I tell him?

Since he’d given me his mate bite, we hadn’t said anything about children. In all the time I’d known him, it wasn’t a topic that had come up between us. It wasn’t like his bodyguard could just say, “Hey, how do you feel about kids?”

I could ask him. But what if he said no?

If he didn’t want children? Or didn’t want children with me?

While his Beast side insisted that I was his mate, now that I’d read the book, I couldn’t believe that his human half would have chosen to mate with me.

Even if he’d been interested on an instinctive level, his rational half had made no move.

When he returned to sanity, when he bonded with his human half, he would understand the danger that faced him. And if his human half didn’t want me, he certainly wouldn’t want me to get pregnant. The sane, rational, thing for him to do would be to renounce the bond the moment he came to his senses.

Maybe if he did it quickly enough, there would be no investigation. It would be the sane thing to do. To save his own skin. I couldn’t blame him. In fact, if he really didn’t want me, I’d tell him to do it. To break the bond. The thought made bile churn in my stomach.

I screwed my eyes shut, refusing to let tears come. It would tear me open inside to let him go, but the bond wasn’t worth his life. And unless I convinced him to merge with his human half, it was all moot anyway. I had no hope of getting the Beast to renounce the bond.

A headache began to throb behind my eyes, making it even harder to work through the options.

If he wouldn’t renounce me, his life was in danger if the truth came out.

I’d lie to protect him, that was a given.

But I might not have that choice. In an official investigation I could be forced to tell the truth.

Cold sweat formed between my shoulder blades.

If that happened and I was forced to tell the full truth?

The outcome would be a death sentence for Bastien.

In that worst-case scenario, a pregnancy would give us time we wouldn’t otherwise have.

Time that I planned to use wisely. No way my mate was going to get executed on my watch.

It was bad enough that he had been kidnapped and hurt under my care.

And that was before he’d given me his bite.

I didn’t know how I would survive if he died.

Gah. What should I do? I could wait and talk to him about it when he woke. But in the last few minutes that I’d been sitting here my pre-cog had started to ping.

Danger was coming.

I had to do it. I was out of time.

Getting my mind clear enough to cast the spell was hard. But the spell itself was easy. A little zap of power. A sting in my arm. It was done.

I still hadn’t decided what I was going to do when I exited the bathroom. I stumbled to a stop when I saw Bastien standing in front of me in nothing but his boxers. His eyes roved up and down my body, heating my blood.

Mate.

Like always, the word scrambled my brain. I had spent so many years wanting him to call me his mate. But it wasn’t really true. It wouldn’t last.

Hurt stabbed into my chest like a knife.

I held it close, keeping it to myself. He’d bitten me.

I wasn’t hurt because he’d bitten me. I was hurt because he’d lost control.

He hadn’t meant to do it. If it had been intentional, if he had truly wanted me, he would have Declared his Intent, the way the book outlined.

Bastien had years during which he could have said something to me.

Anything to indicate that he wanted me as his mate.

But there’d been nothing.

“We need to talk,” I managed eventually, walking around the edge of the room, keeping my distance from the bed, my eyes on him. You never turn your back on a predator.

My pre-cog pinged again. Faster this time. Shit. I was getting a very bad feeling that this was related to our bond and Bastien’s failure to declare that I was his mate.

Talk later. You are sad now. I will fuck you until you are not sad.

The image he sent me was so hot, I had to hold in a shudder of desire. His large body covering mine, my legs over his shoulders, his cock buried deep inside me. Holding me down. Dominating me. Owning me.

I straightened my spine. Lifted my chin.

“We’ll talk now.” Holding up the book, I watched as his eyes widened, then narrowed in sudden understanding.

“We’re in a world of trouble because of your impulsive decision and we need to work out how to fix it.

Before we run out of time. Even now I can feel the danger closing in. ”

Fix it? Bastien’s mental voice was dark with anger.

Well, fuck him. I could be angry too. “Yes. Fix it. Fix the fact that the Council will be out for your head. Deal with the consequences of this fucked up mating bond that you didn’t really want.”

He reared back as if I’d struck him, eyes wide with shock, mouth open. It gave me no satisfaction. His hurt pulsed down the bond. My anger drained away.

Ping. Ping. Fuck we were running out of time. My stomach clenched. I needed clothes. Which were on the other side of the room. Past the Beast.

Slowly, Bastien began to stalk towards me. His eyes blazing, muscles in his arms bunching, he looked ready to pounce. He was dangerous and powerful.

I didn’t want this bond? His mental voice was dangerous. Edged with darkness.

“What am I to think?” I waved the book at him. “If you wanted to court me you could have Declared your Intent. But you didn’t. Sooner or later, your human side will regain control, or you’ll find balance, and then you won’t want me anymore.”

He took a step forwards.

Swallowing heavily, I took a step back, edging closer to the table, wanting a barrier, however fragile, between him and me.

I knew he wouldn’t hurt me. His body was coiled tightly, his jaw clenched, but he was in control.

He didn’t want to hurt me, but he did want to teach me a lesson.

The air between us felt charged with so much sexual tension it was hard to breathe.

I was fully capable of defending myself, but I didn’t want to.

The anticipation of knowing a monster was stalking me made me feel alive. Made me feel wanted. It felt like I was playing with fire. Any moment he could lose control and it would consume me.

I taunted the monster a little more. It was reckless, but I no longer cared. I needed to know what this thing between us was, before we were separated. I was done second-guessing him.

“If you didn’t want me as your mate, just tell me. Better I know now before you change your mind.”

We have wanted you since the first moment your scent filled our nostrils. From the first moment we took your small hand in ours. From the first glare you gave us when we underestimated you.

His words shook me to my core. Was it true? “Then why didn’t you say anything? Why didn’t you Declare your Intent?” There. It was out in the open. The big question.

Ping. Ping. Ping.

It was too urgent to ignore any longer. Fuck. Bad timing. But then, there was never any good timing for whatever was coming.

I turned towards the door just as Bastien declared, Someone comes .

I could hear voices outside the door. My hearing wasn’t good enough to tell what was being said, but I could tell that Bastien could hear the conversation from the way his face darkened.

Get behind me , he growled down the bond. And this time, just do as I tell you .