Page 6 of The Beast’s Duchess (Duchesses of Inconvenience #1)

Chapter Five

C hristopher shook his hair back into place, savoring the way the wind had whipped it free from where he sat on the back of his horse. Nothing served to clear his head quite like riding did.

By the time he made his way back to the manor, he felt like he could handle whatever his new bride threw at him.

He removed his hat and flexed his stiff fingers before taking off his gloves, revealing the scarred tissue underneath.

He massaged and stretched them till he felt comfortable moving them again.

He had spent months rehabilitating them after the fire, and while the scarring was not as bad as it could have been, there were days that were especially hard on them. Windy days, cold days when the skin tightened and reminded him just what he had lost.

He had managed to unbutton his coat, vest and cravat when the butler knocked at the door.

“Welcome back, sir. How was your ride?” He asked.

Christopher couldn't help but notice that the butler seemed nervous. He narrowed his eyes. “What is wrong?”

“I’m afraid it’s the Duchess, sir.”

“What about her?”

“Well, we—we can’t find her.”

“What?” He froze. He was out of his rooms in an instant, intending to storm to her room to make sure of the fact. “Where have you looked?”

“She is not in her rooms, or any other part of the castle she has seen.”

This made him pause. “Whatever do you mean by that?”

Just then a maid rushed over, her eyes so focused on the butler she missed him standing a bit further away. “Sir I have news of_ oh! Your Grace, please pardon me, I did not see you!”

“That’s alright.” he nodded to them before turning to move through the castle once more.

“Out with it Jane,” the butler said.

“I believe I saw Her Grace walking towards the restricted section of the castle.”

Christopher didn’t need to hear anymore. For he could see the still ajar door of his study. And the Duchess moving towards his desk, towards that letter, his blood ran cold.

“What exactly do you think you’re doing in here?” he snapped.

She froze like a child caught with the cookie jar.

“Your Grace!” she gasped, taking a step away from him.

“Did you hear me? I asked you what you think you are doing here?”

“I wasn’t doing anything,” she insisted. “I was just exploring and I stumbled on this room.”

“And when you realized it was my study, you decided it was appropriate for you to continue?”

He took a step toward her and her face went red, eyes darting to his chest. And his hands.

Christopher cursed himself. He had been in such a rush he hadn’t had time to change fully from his ride. The simple white shirt he wore hung open at the neck, allowing some of his scars to peek out from under the fabric.

And his hands didn’t have gloves. He turned away. He didn’t yell, but his voice came out colder than ice. “Get out. Now!” He shook his head, storming off to his room to change out of his dirty clothes.

How much did she see? He tried to calculate how much time she could have spent in his office. How many letters like the one she held did she read?

The thought was like a stab to his chest.

That room had been a safe haven. A place where his old self could still exist... where Alexander could still exist.

I knew I wasn’t ready for this.

“No.”

Her voice stopped him in his tracks, and a moment later she stood in front of him, blocking his way.

“Stand aside!” he snarled.

“I said no. I will not leave. Not until you tell me why you hate me so much.”

He could feel the blood drain from his face. She knows. She knows about Alexander. “What you saw in my study...”

“Is only proof that you resent me for that fire.”

He was not ready to talk to her about this, not when he had pushed down the memories and the sense of loss for so long. Marrying her was a mistake. He should never have let his feelings take control...

“I can see it in your face, don’t deny it. That is why you ignored my letters, and why you don’t want me in the areas of your life that matter to you. You resent me for the scars I caused. I am sorry, I will never stop being sorry for all of this_”

“Stop!” He shouted, and the sound felt like it ripped something from him. “Just stop! It does not matter why I have my rules, only that I have them.” He took a few steps closer, cornering her as she retreated. “And you had best remember to obey them.”

“What happened to you?” she asked softly.

Seeing what must be pity in her eyes only sharpened his fury.

“I beg your pardon.”

“I asked what happened to you? They way you’re acting, this isn’t the same man I met at that ball. He would never have behaved like this.”

“You’re right,” Christopher took a step towards her, his voice as cold as the winter wind. “He wouldn’t have done any of this, but he isn’t here any more. He died the night of the fire with the others. I am all that remains.”

Veronica studied him with eyes far too clever for her own good. “I’m sorry for that night, it must truly have been painful for you to have hardened so much.”

“Stop saying you’re sorry!” He reared back. “You haven’t the slightest idea what you’re talking about. You would do well to stay out of my affairs.”

“Then why did you intrude into mine? Why did you suddenly reappear and decide you had to marry me?”

“I didn’t decide anything. You were the one who forgot we were betrothed!”

“I only set aside the betrothal because you have been giving me the cold shoulder for so long. I wrote to you countless times, and yet you never replied, even though you read my letters.”

“If you were that concerned, you could have come and paid me a call.”

“I couldn’t!”

“And why ever not?”

“It would have been beyond improper.”

He scoffed. “No it wouldn’t. We were already betrothed. No one would have thought twice about it.Are you going to stand there and lie to me?”

“Alright, fine! Yes, the idea was suggested! My mother even offered to arrange for me to visit with a family friend, but I had already written to you several times! I had tried to reach out to you, and you rejected me. Like—like—I wanted to see you make an effort.” Her throat worked, and she swallowed hard.

He narrowed his eyes. “I never made an effort?”

“You ignored me! You pushed me aside like the rest of the ton did! How could I take it as anything but a rejection?”

Christopher scoffed, shaking his head. “Did you ever think that the reason you hadn’t heard from me wasn’t about you?”

“But what else would be the reason for you walking away?”

Christopher clenched his hands into fists. I walked away? After everything that happened she was going to say that I walked away? He had been hurt. Deeply. And in more ways than one.

He had needed time.

And she was going to hold that against him?

“I will see you at dinner,” he grumbled as he walked away.

“You expect us to share dinner, when you won’t even talk to me? What’s the point?”

“Fine,” he gritted out. “Go hungry tonight for all I care.” Christopher spun on his heels and stormed off, ignoring her voice calling after him.

He had let his best friend die in that fire because he chose to save her first. Because he chose her, the woman he was supposed to marry, he didn’t have enough time to go back and save his childhood friend.

If she wanted to act like she was the wounded party, then she could do that alone.