Page 42

FORTY-TWO

LENNON

My heart is thudding obscenely hard in my chest as I stare down at the man who I just offered my virginity to. Although I’m not sure if he’s even going to agree because he’s currently looking at me like I’ve said something insane.

“Do you not wa—” The sentence dies on my tongue because he sits up, plastering us tightly together as he captures my lips and silences me with a kiss that makes me feel light-headed and breathless.

When he pulls back, his dark eyes are stormy.

“Trust me when I say I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anything in my fucking life.

Don’t ever doubt the way I want you.” He sweeps his thumb along my jaw, where he’s holding me.

“I just know that you said you weren’t ready, and I don’t want you to feel like you’re pressured to do anything. ”

I melt just a little bit at the fact that he’s worried about my consent and that I might not be thinking clearly. But the truth is, I’ve never been more sure of anything.

I kept this promise ring on my finger as a reminder to myself after everything that I’ve been through. It’s never been about my virginity, not really. It’s always been about choice, about reclaiming my decisions. That whoever I have sex with will be because I wanted to.

And I’m choosing Saint.

With him, I feel confident, and comfortable, and safe. I feel seen not just for the person I’m trying to be but for the one I’ve always been. I don’t feel like I have to hide who I am.

Even if we’re not together, or even if we don’t ever move past this moment, I know undoubtedly that he’s the one I want to share it with.

“I’m a thousand percent sure. I want it to be you,” I say as I lift my chin, the conviction in my tone evident.

A beat passes between us as his eyes search mine, him drinking in the gravity of what I’ve just said.

Finally, once the silence surrounding us feels too heavy, he nods. “Okay.”

“Now, if you’re done trying to protect my virtue…

can you go back to the growly, dirty-talking man you were like fifteen minutes ago?

” I roll my lips together, biting back a giggle when his gaze narrows, and he leans forward, nipping at the sensitive skin on the slope of my shoulder, his teeth sinking in until I whimper.

A needy, desperate sound that, for a moment, I’m unsure if it even came from me.

His tongue sweeps across the spot he just bit, and every single nerve ending in my body comes alive all at once.

God, how does he read my body so well? Sometimes it feels like he knows it better than I do. Exactly where to touch, to kiss, to lick that’s going to drive me insane with desire.

After the orgasm he just gave me with his tongue, I’m desperate for more.

The throb inside of me builds in intensity with each lash of his tongue.

My nipples are puckered tightly, and the sensation of the peaks dragging across his chest feels so good I wonder if I could possibly come that way.

Tearing his mouth free, his breath cascades along my heated skin, sending goose bumps barreling across my flesh.

He plants kisses on every spot his lips can reach, my collarbone, the swell of my breasts, my neck, until I’m nearly panting. “I want you on top, just like this, taking it as slow or fast as you want. I want you in control, baby.”

“Okay,” I murmur, running my hand over his chest, trying to stop the bloom in mine.

He’s being thoughtful, and intentional, and it’s… adorable.

A word I never thought I would use to describe the man beneath me.

His eyes hold mine for another beat, then two, as if giving me time to change my mind, and when I don’t, only giving him a cheeky smile, he reaches between us and fists the base of his cock, giving it a languid pump.

It’s unbelievably hot. I make a mental note to ask him to… explore that more later. There are lots of things I want to explore with him.

“Put my cock in you, inch by inch… I want you to take it all,” Saint rasps.

My clit pulses in response. I lift on trembling knees, my hands curved around his shoulders, clutching him as I do as I’m told.

He drags his erection through my pussy, coating the blunt head in my arousal and rubbing my clit with it. The pad of his thumb sweeps over his slit, around the piercing that I’m both excited and slightly terrified to know how it will feel when it’s inside of me.

My heart is racing with anticipation, heady desire, so many different emotions, but mostly, it just feels right.

“Goddamnit, I almost forgot a condom. You make me so fucking crazy, Golden Girl.” He groans, dropping his head back against the headboard. “And I didn’t even bring my wallet, which means…”

“You don’t have one?”

He nods. “It’s all right though. I’ll just make you come with my mouth…” He leans in and presses a kiss to the corner of my lips. “My fingers…” Another kiss at the edge of my jaw.

“Let’s not use one.”

Abruptly, he pulls back, his brows pulling tight. “I’ve never had sex without a condom.”

“Yeah, well, coincidentally, neither have I.” I grin. “I’ve got an IUD. It’s good for seven years, which means as long as you’re good, then… I’m good.”

Saint’s throat works as he swallows, his palm running over my hair, his eyes bouncing between mine. “I’m good. You sure?”

I capture my bottom lip between my teeth as I wrap my hand around the base of his cock and line it up with my entrance, holding his intense, heated gaze as I slowly sink down until the tip is inside me. “Positive.”

It’s actually not as painful as I imagined it would be. More of a biting sting that feels hot and sharp as my body stretches to accommodate him.

“Fuuuck, Lennon.” He groans raggedly. I’m distracted from the slight discomfort by watching him. His nostrils flare, and his jaw tenses as he grits his teeth together.

Clearly trying to hold on to his resolve.

Suddenly, his lips are on mine, crashing into me like he couldn’t last another second without it.

His tongue slips inside my mouth as he kisses the ever-living shit out of me, making it even harder to breathe as I slowly drop down onto him inch by inch, an agonizingly slow descent that’s a mixture of discomfort and fullness that I’ve never experienced.

“Yeah, that’s my good girl,” he praises as he grips my hips, steadying me. “You’re doing so fucking good taking my cock, baby. Fuck, just look at you.”

My gaze drops to where we’re joined, his huge, veiny length sliding inside of me.

“Oh God,” I groan, my eyes falling shut. “It’s just the tip , Saint!”

His chuckle is low and gravelly. “You can take it. I know you can. Show me how much that tight little cunt was made for me, Lennon, made to take my big cock.”

God, I love this. His filthy, obscene words.

I never knew I would be so turned on by someone saying things like that to me, but every time he does, it makes me so hot, so wet.

I let out a stuttering exhale, sinking farther onto him until I reach the point of resistance, where it feels like he might split me open with said big cock . My nails bite into his shoulders, my eyes squeezing shut.

“You would have a stupidly large dick,” I mutter, holding myself completely still.

I feel him shake beneath me with a chuckle. “Pretty sure I told you that when you met me.”

Cocky as always.

Hot… as always.

“Breathe through it, baby. It’ll feel so much better once you’re past this. Just focus on me.”

I watch him spit into his palm before he brings his fingers to my clit and circles it slowly, applying the perfect amount of pressure, sending a jolt of pleasure shooting through me. “Come on, baby, fuck yourself onto my cock. Take me like the good girl I know you are.”

He’s talking me through it in the literal sense, and it’s exactly what I didn’t even know that I needed.

I swallow down my anxiousness and suck in a deep, shaky breath before slowly sinking down fully onto his cock. It hurts for a single breath as he rips through my virginity, but then… it quickly fades, dulls into a throbbing ache inside of me.

I’m fully seated, my clit brushing the short, soft hair at the base of his cock. Saint’s hands move gently along my hips, over my back, his lips pressing to my buzzing skin.

“That’s it, baby. I’m so proud of you,” he says hoarsely.

“Fuck, you feel so good, Lennon. So goddamn good squeezing my cock.” I can feel him twitching inside me as his hands find my hips, fingers digging into the soft skin of my hips to keep me still, his breathing strained.

“Don’t move, or I’m going to come. I need a second. ”

The thought sends a shiver down my spine, and for the first time, I’m realizing… how much I think I’d like that.

Saint’s gaze darkens as it moves over my face, the corner of his lips tilting into a sexy grin. “You like that.”

It’s not a question but a statement.

A hot blush climbs my neck, racing to my cheeks. I’m not sure why I’m suddenly embarrassed about that, maybe because it’s so intimate, so erotic. The thought of him coming inside of me turns me on so much.

“Fuck, baby, I can feel you clenching around me. You want me to fill you up? Pump your pussy full of my cum until it’s dripping out of you, hm?”

Oh God.

I can feel my pulse between my legs, and I nod, blurting out, “I want… it everywhere. But I really want it inside of me.”

“You’re going to fucking kill me, Lennon,” he grunts.

My hips squirm, desperate to move , to chase the flame that tugs at my lower belly.

I lift on my knees until only the tip of his cock is still inside of me before sliding back down, circling my hips, dragging my clit against his pubic bone. The delicious friction sends my toes curling.

There’s the smallest remaining twinge of pain, but it’s replaced by something different—blinding hot pleasure.

“I need… I need more. Please.”

Saint groans, flexing his hips and pushing deeper inside of me. “Fuck, I love hearing you beg for me.”

He guides me up and down on his cock, rocking up into me with hard, sharp thrusts that have my head feeling light, my vision turning hazy.

“Don’t stop. Don’t… Don’t stop-p.” I’m panting, shallow breaths.

Suddenly, he’s flipping us, the movement effortless, never slipping out of me as my back hits the mattress. His rough palm slides along the back of my thigh, and he hitches my leg higher onto his side, burying his cock inside me again to the hilt.

The position is somehow even better. My toes curl, my fingers tangling into the hair at his nape as he captures my lips, swallowing down the shameless, breathless moans that he’s tearing out of me.

He thrusts deeper, so deep that I swear he’s in my stomach, and rotates his hips.

Pulling back, I moan, “Oh my God. Saint…” Pleasure steals my breath, and I swallow, sucking in air as he pounds into me, hips slapping against my thighs. “I think I’m… I think…”

“Tell me where you want my cum, baby. I need you to tell me right fucking now.”

I’m so close, so, so close, I can hardly form a single rational thought.

“On me.”

His hips flex, and he hits that spot inside of me that has my eyes rolling shut. Blinding, bright pleasure crescendos inside of me, pulling me under as my climax crashes into me in a torrential wave. My belly quivers, drawing tight as my orgasm ripples through me.

“That’s my girl, milking my cock like she was made for me,” Saint murmurs, the filthy words hoarse and full of need, only making my orgasm more intense, prolonging it until every muscle in my body is limp.

He pulls out of me, and my eyes snap open as he rises to his knees and pumps his fist around his cock, spilling all over my stomach.

His lips are parted, eyes squeezed as he groans, painting me with his cum, thick ropes that pool in my belly button.

God, the sight of him trembling, muscles rippling as he strokes his cock and marks me, is the sexiest thing I’ve ever witnessed.

When he’s finished, his eyes slowly crack open, drinking me in with a satisfied smile. “You look so fucking good covered in me. My messy good girl.”

I draw my bottom lip between my teeth as I bring my fingers to the cum on my stomach and drag them through it, watching his gaze darken, pupils flickering with heat when I bring it to my lips. I wrap my lips around my finger and suck it off, something that I know he loves to see.

That’s the only reason I’m feeling so brazenly confident to do it.

“Stop tempting me, baby. You’re going to be sore, and all I want to do is fuck you again. Next time, I’m going to make sure every goddamn drop stays inside you,” he rasps but moves off the bed.

I sit up on my elbows, about to ask him where he’s going, but he disappears into the bathroom, and I hear the water running, only for him to return with a washcloth in his hand.

His knee hits the bed, and he moves over me, gently cleaning the mess he left behind off my stomach. I had no expectations about what this experience would be like with Saint. I know that he’s not a soft kind of guy, but he surprises me.

He’s tender, attentive, and thorough as he cleans me off, then throws the dirty washcloth into the laundry basket.

I reach for the comforter to cover myself, but he pulls it out of my hand with a shake of his head. “Fuck no.” He parts my thighs, dropping onto his stomach between them, eyes holding mine. “Now, let me take care of you, baby.”

I think I’m going to have heart palpitations. He just took my virginity. There’s probably…

“You don’t have to do that, Saint. There’s probably some, um, blood… from you know,” I say, staring down my body at him.

I feel the warm fan of his chuckle against my sensitive flesh. “And? You think I care about that? I’m going to lick my girl’s swollen, little pussy until every fucking drop is on my tongue.”

Oh.

Well, okay th?—

The coherent thought slips away when he does exactly as he says and drags his tongue through my slit, lapping at me until I’m not thinking about the ache any longer. All I’m thinking about is the way he’s unabashedly devouring me without any hesitation.

“You know what you taste like, Golden Girl?”

I look down at him, cataloging his hard, possessive stare, mouth hovering over my pussy.

“ Mine .”