Page 20

Aurora

I am not sure what compelled me to accept Lucien's invitation for dinner, but here I am, standing at the threshold of his home, an uneasy weight settling in my stomach. It is not the house I once lived in, but it carries the same scent of aged wood and the faint musk of pine—his scent. And the ghosts of our sneaky nights together haunt every pillar. The familiarity unnerves me more than it comforts me.

"Come in," Lucien says, holding the door open. His voice is steady, but there is something else beneath it, something restrained. I hesitate for a second before stepping inside, Ronan's small hand gripping mine tightly.

Sighting Ronan, Lucien smiles, kneeling to Ronan's level and ruffling his hair. "Hello, big guy." Ronan let out a shriek in response, stretching himself to get to Lucien's hair. After lots of failed attempts, Lucien bends his head, giving Ronan access to ruffle his locks.

I stand by the side, fighting the smile tugging at my lips. I'll never get used to the feeling that comes with seeing them together.

"Come on, dinner's waiting," Lucien stretches out his hand to Ronan, who clings tightly to it. We follow him into the open dining room of the pack house.

I have no expectations for tonight, but I sure as hell did not expect freshly cooked meals and a kitchen that looks very used.

That surprises me. "You… cooked?"

A small, almost boyish smirk crosses his face. "I do know how to feed myself, Aurora."

I swallow past the lump forming in my throat. There is something so unnatural about seeing Lucien like this—domestic and almost gentle. I always got to see the calm, calculated, and practical side of him. This is different. Now, he is watching me like I am something fragile, something he can't afford to mishandle again.

Ronan, oblivious to the tension in the room, dashes toward the dining table, already drawn to the spread of food. "Mom, look! My favorite!" He points at the plate of grilled chicken and mashed potatoes, bouncing on the heels of his feet.

My breath hitches. Next to the spread were my favorite spaghetti and meatballs with extra tomato sauce, making the pasta extra juicy. It's just the way I love it. But that isn't what causes the tightness in my throat. He has known me long enough to know and possibly recall my favorite food. It's Ronan's that has me in awe.

Lucien remembered every detail. I can vaguely recall Ronan yapping about his love for chicken and mashed potatoes and how he thinks mashed potatoes are much better than ice cream. Lucien laughed for most of the conversation, and I figured he might chalk it up as a kid's mindless ramble, but he didn't. He listened, and not only did he listen, he made good use of the information.

I force my expression to remain neutral as I take a seat beside Ronan. Lucien sits across from us, his gaze never straying too far from mine. The first few bites are eaten in silence, the only sounds coming from Ronan's delighted hums as he shovels food into his mouth.

"You're a good cook," I finally admit, my voice quieter than I intended.

Lucien's lips twitch, his fork hovering mid-air. "I had a good reason to learn." His eyes meet mine, and the weight of those words settles between us like a tangible force.

Averting my gaze, I focus on my plate, unsure of how to navigate this fragile truce we had found ourselves in. While I've become moderately civil to him—I don't want Ronan to find us arguing and bickering—I still haven't warmed up to him, and these gestures make me uncomfortable.

"So, Ronan," Lucien says, shifting the conversation. "Did you enjoy spending time with the pack today?"

Ronan nods enthusiastically, his curls bouncing with the movement. "Yeah! Uncle Liam showed me the training grounds. I saw warriors shifting! It was so cool."

Lucien chuckles. "Maybe one day, you'll train with them."

Ronan's eyes sparkle. "Really?"

"If that's what you want."

I press my lips together, watching the way Lucien interacts with our son. It was natural, effortless even. But that was the cruelest part, wasn't it? The promises and the hope.

While I cannot deny the efforts he's making, I also can't ignore the part of me that remains on guard. I'm worried about Ronan. I'm worried that Lucien is going to waltz into his life, give him a taste of his signature charm and sweetness, and leave just when he needs him.

I've spent the past years raising him in the best way I could. It hasn't been easy, but I made sure he has never lacked anything. If I'm to ever officially bring a man into our lives, I have to make sure it'll be someone who can stay. Someone dependable, someone who will make him a priority and choose him over anything. I am not sure Lucien can be that man.

And there's the case of Selene. We haven't spoken about her, partly because I've not asked, but she hangs over us like a grey cloud.I gathered from the healer that she is on a condolence visit to Ironclaw. Something about them losing their alpha to Silver Pack, but she will be back, and she'll assume her position as his Luna.

It's part of the reason I find it difficult to trust him. He claims he wants to be a part of my life, but he already has one here, and as ruthless as Lucien might be, he'll not abandon his wife. I won't let him do that. I refuse to subject another woman to the pain I endured.

The past claws at the edges of my resolve, but before I can succumb to it, Ronan yawns, rubbing at his eyes.

"I think it's bedtime," I say softly, pushing my chair back.

Lucien's expression flickers, just for a moment, before he nods. "I'll take him."

Before I could object, lifts Ronan into his arms with the kind of familiarity that made my heart ache. Ronan barely protests, already half-asleep against Lucien's shoulder.I follow them down the hall, stopping at the doorway as Lucien lays Ronan down, tucking the blankets around him. He hesitates, then brushes a hand over Ronan's curls, his thumb lingering on his cheek.

The sight was almost too much to bear.

Lucien turned, his expression unreadable. "Can we talk?"

I should say no. I should bid him farewell and insist on returning to my home and letting the past stay buried. But something in his voice, something raw and unguarded, makes me nod.

He leads us to the back porch, the cool night air wrapping around us. The moon hangs heavy in the sky, casting silver light across the landscape. For a while, neither of us spoke. We bask in the silence, soaking up the glow of the moon while crickets and other creatures of the night serenade us with their chaotic harmony.

"I never stopped looking for you," Lucien finally says. His voice was quiet, rough.

I cross my arms, bracing myself. "You didn't look hard enough."

His jaw clenches. "Aurora—"

"You chose Selene," I cut in, the old wounds splitting open despite my best efforts to keep them closed. "You didn't fight for me. You didn't believe in us."

Regret darkened his expression. "I was young and reckless, and I thought I was doing what was best for the pack."

A bitter laugh escaped me. "And what about what was best for me, Lucien? You don't get to push your way back into my life and demand everything you threw away."I catch my lower lips between my teeth to keep them from trembling. I hate how this conversation still triggers me after years. Almost as though the wounds reopen at every turn.

"I didn't realize that losing you would cost me everything." His response is low, almost blending with the soft whispers of the trees around us.

The words hang between us, heavy and unrelenting. I have always wanted to ask him about his wolf since the healer mentioned it, but I've not found the right time. Lucien is not exactly one to sit and chat about his feelings, and I can't imagine how difficult it must've been for him to rule without his wolf.

I suck in a deep breath, steadying my voice before speaking." when did it happen?"

Lucien cocks a brow. "When did I realize losing you cost me everything?"

"Your wolf, when did he go away?"He stiffens at my question, his fist curling around the railing and gripping tight. The conversation is not going to be a comfortable one, but it has to happen. It suddenly makes sense that my wolf has been very quiet since we stepped into Blackwood.

I had assumed she was crippled by nostalgia and taking her time to soak in the feeling of being home, but I was wrong. This is her reason. She cannot feel or connect to her mate.

"When did it happen?" I repeat, my tone softer and urging him to talk to me. I could've easily gotten the information from the pack healer or one of the pack members, but I want to hear it from him."The day you left," he admits, turning to me. "It wasn't just about the bond, Aurora. It was you. You were my strength."

My resolve wavers, but I can't let myself crumble. Not yet. There's still a lot for us to unpack. "Lucien…"

He lifts his hand, hovering it near my cheek before he lets it drop. "I know I don't deserve forgiveness. But I'll fight for it if you let me."

The air shifts between us, going from cool and breezy to warm and suffocating. I swallow hard, my heart a chaotic mess of longing and fear.

"I don't know if I can," I whisper.

"Let me try at least." He says, taking a step closer. "Let me show you how badly I want for us to work out. Let me show you how much I've missed you." Another step closer. "Let me show the beautiful family we can have.""You already have a family, Lucien." My voice is breathless and weaker than I intend, but it passes the message clearly.

Lucien lets out a small smile and straightens his posture, but he does not step away from me. "I was wondering when you were going to bring that up."

"I won't take away another woman's husband, and I sure as hell did not go through all of this to end up as your mistress in the end.""Rora," he says my name like a silent prayer. "You won't be taking anything from anybody. I've always been yours."

I let out a scoff, stepping away from his zone of influence to clear my head. "I believe everyone would have a very different answer."

"Selene found her mate, and she's currently at his pack to see his people through a difficult time."

The wheels in my brain spin at a very speedy rate, putting two and two together. A gasp escapes my lips. "The alpha of Ironclaw? Didn't he…isn't he…dear Goddess. How is she?"

"Not her best, but Selene's a tough one. She'll pull through."While I never had a close relationship with Selene, she has always been one of the females I admired in the pack. I have no doubt she'll pull through. She was practically raised to be a leader, but at the same time, I cannot imagine the pain of losing a mate.

Lucien and I might've been separated for a long time, but the mere thought of his death chills me to the bones.

I don't notice Lucien close the distance between us till he's practically in my face. "I told you it's going to be different this time. Even the circumstances are aligning in our favor."

Despite the haze of emotions clouding my brain, I find it difficult to disagree with him. The situation seems almost tailored in our favor, but I don't admit it to him. Hope will only get me hurt, and I cannot afford to trust in the words of a man or make mindless mistakes. I have my son to think about.

"Rora." Lucien picks up a stray lock of hair from my shoulder, wrapping it softly around his index finger. The movement is innocent and almost mindless, but it causes my stomach to flip in the most unnatural way.

It has to be his closeness to me. Even the air has gone from refreshing to being doused with pine and amber. His scent clouds my thoughts, and he is all I can inhale.

I make an attempt to take a step back and collect my thoughts before I make a mistake, but Lucien eats up the distance as soon as I create it.

"Stop fighting us. I know you feel this too." His voice is raspy and heavy with need, and his eyes burn at every point they touch. I silently curse myself for the emotions pouring through me.

"Lucien—

"Shhh," he places his forehead on mine, our breath mingling. My chest is heaving against his, the swell of my breast straining through the soft fabric of my shirt and brushing against his muscled chest.

His eyes trail from my eyes to my lips down to my hardened nipples and back to my face.

Just as he moves to close the distance, my phone rings, the sharp sound cutting through the stillness of the night and startling me out of the moment.

I fumble for it in my pocket. Pulling it out to find a very familiar name flashing through the screen.

Damon.

My throat tightens. I feel Lucien stiffen beside me, his gaze darkening as he catches a glimpse of the name flashing across my screen.

I hesitate for a beat too long, and Lucien exhales sharply. "Don't take it."

I look at him to find his eyes on me, pleading, and then back at the screen, my finger hovering over the button.