Page 24 of Tempted by a Highland Beast (Tales of Love and Lust in the Murray Castle #9)
“Dinnae,” he said quickly. “I’m nae telling ye fer pity. Just... answering yer question. Ye deserve tae ken who I am before making a decision.”
“How long? How long were ye alone like that?”
“Until I was old enough tae hold a sword properly. Maybe fourteen.” He shifted, his shoulder brushing hers in the small space.
“A mercenary captain found me in a tavern fight—some drunk had tried tae take me meal, and I’d put a blade between his ribs fer it.
The captain was impressed enough tae offer me work. ”
“And ye took it.”
“I did. It meant food, shelter, coin in me pocket.” Constantine’s mouth quirked in what might have been a smile. “Fighting was the one thing I’d always been good at. Finally found a way tae make it pay.”
“Is that when ye met Theo and Finlay?”
“Theo first. A few years later, after I made a name in the Highlands as a mercenary, I found Theo half-dead after a clan raid, his whole family slaughtered. He was burning with fever and rage in equal measure. He reminded me of meself at that age.” Constantine leaned back against the stone wall.
“Gave him the same choice the captain had given me: die where he lay, or live fer power.”
“And he chose the latter.”
“Aye. We both did, fer a long time.” His voice grew distant. “Finlay came later, when we were working fer a laird in the Borders.”
Rowena was watching him intently, and he could see her sharp mind working, putting together pieces of the man he’d become. “They’re nae just yer men, are they? They’re yer family.”
The observation hit closer to home than he was comfortable with. “We’ve fought together, bled together. That creates bonds.”
“That’s not what I meant, and ye ken it.
” She turned fully toward him, the movement bringing her closer in the cramped space.
“They follow ye nae because ye pay them, but because they choose tae. Because ye gave them something worth fighting fer. A place where they matter.” Her voice was soft but certain.
“The same things ye needed when ye were that scared lad running through alleys.”
“Ye see a lot fer someone whom I’ve kenned only fer a few days.”
“I see what ye let me see.” She tilted her head, studying his profile. “And try tae figure what ye hide.”
“And what would that be?”
“That beneath all that control, all that careful distance ye maintain, ye want the same thing everyone wants.” Her voice dropped to barely above a whisper. “Tae belong somewhere. Tae be wanted fer more than just what ye can dae with a sword.”
The words hung in the air between them, loaded with understanding that made Constantine’s pulse quicken. The space felt smaller somehow, more dangerous.
“Dangerous territory, lass,” he said, his voice coming colder than before.
“Is it?” She met his gaze directly, unflinching. “Or is it just a truth ye dinnae want tae deal with?”
“Ye have nay idea what ye’re talking about. Ye dinnae ken me, lass.”
The sound of rain against stone began to lessen, the violence of the storm gradually fading into a gentle patter.
Good. The sooner this ends, the better.
He rarely spoke of his past, and when he did, it was only with those who bore the same scars. Men like Theo or Finlay. Whether his truth would shift the way she saw his marriage proposal, he didn’t know. But the words were out, and there was no taking them back.
Constantine pushed himself to his feet. “We should head back.”
She nodded, but as she stood, she stumbled slightly on the uneven ground. Constantine’s hands went automatically to her waist to steady her, and suddenly they were standing far too close.
Constantine’s thumbs pressed against her ribs through the wool of her dress, and he felt her sharp intake of breath.
“Constantine,” she whispered, his name sounding different on her lips, softer, more intimate.
“We should go,” he said, but his hands didn’t release her.
“Aye,” she agreed, though she made no move to step away.
The moment stretched between them, taut with possibility.
He found himself staring at her mouth, wondering what her lips might taste like. The thought was a mistake. It was the wrong time, the wrong place, and he was not sure Rowena was a woman he could touch without wanting to claim her.
Finally, Constantine forced himself to step back.
She smoothed her skirts with hands that trembled slightly, then began to remove his cloak. “Here, take this back.”
“Keep it until we reach the castle,” he said. “Yer dress is still damp.”
And seeing it clung tae yer body isnae daein’ me any favors.
The ride back to Duart passed in charged silence. Constantine was acutely aware of Rowena beside him—the way she sat on her horse with unconscious grace, how the wind caught the loose strands of her hair, the thoughtful expression on her face as she gazed at the rain-washed landscape.
As they dismounted in the bailey, Constantine caught sight of Theo waiting near the stables, his expression grim. The moment of intimacy shattered as Constantine’s mind shifted back to the threats that still circled them.