Page 154 of Tear Me Apart

Jasper glances up at the corner of the room, where the camera hangs, a single eye watching them.

“Can we go somewhere else? Please?”

“Of course.” Zack is dying to read the letter from Vivian, but also afraid to open it, afraid of what he might find, what truths might be revealed. What if Lauren is lying again? What if, what if, what if?

Zack sees Jasper’s hands are shaking, offers to drive. Jasper gets into the car without a word. Zack climbs behind the wheel. Kat is happy to see them; she hates being left alone in the back of the car. Both men get licks on the ear.

“Where to?”

“Let’s... I don’t care. Just drive.”

Zack only knows a few places in Vail—the restaurant, the hospital, the Wrights’ house on the hill. But he remembers there was a scenic overlook on the way down the mountain. He heads there. The day is fine, the snow holding off, the sun shining, the skies blue again. He pulls into the overlook, and they climb out. Kat is thrilled for the excursion, and Zack sets her lead to the longest setting.

They lean against the stone wall. Finally, Zack takes off his sunglasses.

“You want to tell me what’s going on?”

* * *

“There were five of us. All lawyers. All experienced divers. We were off the coast of Baja, on a day trip. There’s a reef out there.”

He goes silent until Zack prompts him. “And?”

“We went out with five and came back in with four.”

“That’s not good.”

Jasper half laughs. “No. Not good at all. We were all hungover. Had no business going on the dive. I was buddied up with a guy I’d just met that week. We were working on a case, had partnered with a firm out in San Diego. He was a decent enough lawyer, but a blustery asshole of a man, all hat, and no cattle, as they say. A talker, a major talker. He’d been talking my ear off all week. Mostly about how his divorce was final, and that was a good thing, because his stupid ex-wife had managed to get herself knocked up, and he hated kids, wasn’t ready to settle down, so he’dbailed on the bitch, quote unquote.”

“I take it his name was Kyle Noonan?”

“Yeah.” Jasper rubs a hand over his face. “You know how guys like that are. They don’t like to be told what to do. We were setting everything up on the boat, and we were all goofing around, getting ready for our last dive of the day, and I must have misread his tank. I remember thinking it might have been a little low, but nothing dangerous. Either way, I should have warned him he needed to stay close to the boat in case he needed to rise up quickly, but I got caught up in another conversation, and before I could tell him, he went down, and the tank malfunctioned. He couldn’t get back to the surface in time.

“It was my fault. I was his partner on the dive. We shouldn’t have been geared up at all, we had all been drinking pretty heavily the night before, but that’s no excuse. He was my partner. I screwed up, and a man died.”

“Sounds like all of you were to blame. Did anyone know? Any of the others?”

Jasper shakes his head. “Everyone thought it was an accident, we all agreed I’d warned him of the low air. It was an accident, and shit happens, right?”

“Right.”

“Hey, don’t judge me, asshole.”

“I’m not. I’ve screwed up, and it cost lives, too. Get off your high horse, I’m not saying anything.”

“Sorry.”

They are quiet for the moment, watching two hawks soar the thermals. “I guess that’s not the end of the story?”

“No. I came back to Denver and looked up the ex-wife. I was going to say something, I guess to apologize in some way. Assuage my guilt. Make it right for her, offer some cash to cover things while she got set with the kid. Noonan made it clear he’d gotten out of the marriage scot-free, and she was left with nothing. Marital deception, some arcane ruling he managed to talk a judge into. And here she is, with this perfect little baby, and she seemed so lost and overwhelmed, and I couldn’t help myself. I stepped right into the void and never looked back.”

“Did you love her?”

“Yeah. I did.”

“Did you tell her? The note, the passport—she figured something out.”

“Early on in our marriage, I got drunk one night, and we had a big fight. I hinted I knew that Lauren’s ex was a total douche from personal experience. My passport went missing right after that. She figured it out. She is so smart.”