Page 78 of Tales of a Deadly Devotion (Tales of a Monstrous Heart, #2)

Chapter Forty

Alma

‘Careful, little nightmare. The blush will give you away,’ came the silky taunt from my side. My plan of moving into the reek of the overcrowded rooms to dissipate the allure of the voyav’s scent hadn’t worked.

‘It’s the powder,’ I snapped, averting my gaze back to the table.

Hoping it was just the pink powder William had assaulted my face with.

Seeming far too cheery when presented with the task of dressing us up.

Ignoring every protest I’d made as if he’d been given a doll to dress with firm instructions from the voyav.

Only this time this whole thing was both mine and Kat’s stupid idea. At least she’d had the mercy to be glamoured.

I wasn’t so lucky. I’d been forced into a silk monstrosity. It clung to my hips and waist. The bodice was low enough to reveal the swell of my breasts and disturb the old withered men at their gambling table. Despite the young women draped around them. Some missing most of their clothes altogether.

Thankfully the lanterns and pipe smoke in the den were enough to cover the rest. Though I doubted anyone in here was sober enough to care.

I’d heard of places like this. My Keeper had used them as a threat. Unsavoury and sinful places. Ones that had made me beg and whimper at the mere thought. Thinking my Keeper’s treatment a blessing in comparison.

Most were underground. Set up in old sewer tunnels, ruins of king’s keeps or travelling markets. This one occupied the old lord’s house. Walls painted garish red and silks hung from the ceiling, threatening to catch on to the plethora of candles occupying the cramped main hall.

‘I was a maid, not a nun,’ I sighed, keeping that ridiculous pleased smile I’d seen on the other women’s lips, as if they were nothing but dolls to be paraded by children.

‘You had a lover?’ Thean inclined their head, their curiosity sharp. I didn’t know what surprised me more. That we were onto this subject, or the voyav’s apparent genuine interest in those amber eyes as they focused solely on me.

‘No,’ I snorted. A quick rutting in the back storeroom with a carriage doorman or delivery boy couldn’t be described as anything other than seeing to a need. ‘Quick and unmemorable.’

Never the same twice. Never allowing them to leave their claim.

I’d refused to be ashamed by it. The things my body wanted. The relief it sought.

‘My beasts have urges.’ Why most shapeshifters had found themselves in the trap of being owned. Having their bodies used. Their relaxed ease with sexuality weaponised against them.

I’d never discussed it with Kat. Didn’t need to.

She always knew everything anyway. Instead, I’d found tonic tucked in my skirt pockets and a warm tub of water afterwards.

She’d always find somewhere else to be, even if it was to be berated by a master or one of the librarians.

As if knowing I’d want time alone. To put myself back together.

Thean’s lips pursed and I couldn’t determine if they were displeased by the revelation or unbothered.

‘You’ve had a lover?’ I hated the strange bite of interest in my voice. Unable to let this small thread go. Distracting me momentarily from my hunt. Not fully understanding why I’d want to know. Why something vicious curled in my gut that felt abominably like jealousy.

A short laugh left Thean’s lips, their smile tight as if pained by it. ‘Nobody is foolish enough to love me , darling.’

Emmaline did. Only I didn’t say the words. Understanding that the voyav was bound to the Blackthorn house out of loyalty. A loyalty I understood without confirmation.

They’d loved Emmaline in their own way. Loved her enough to keep their promises. Blood oath or not. Just as I loved Kat, even if my secrets would be dangerous to her.

‘She wouldn’t let them.’ Thean let the words slip out so softly they were almost lost in another screech of laughter from a passing group of patrons.

I couldn’t miss the pain burrowed in those words. The small dismissiveness of them. Knowing they didn’t intend me to hear, or simply that they were too used to nobody listening.

My nose stung, strange emotion clogging my throat, confessions wanting to spill from my lips, but that was the little fool I had once been. The one who took her punishments too easily.

‘You should have helped, Kat,’ I admonished softly as I turned my attention back to the wretched room.

‘I thought it was clear by now, little nightmare.’ They brushed those words with the barest whisper of breath up the side of my throat. ‘I’m only interested in helping you.’

‘How lucky for me,’ I turned to look at them, how close they were. The warmth of them brushing down the length of my back. How desperately my beasts wished to arch back into it. To demand more.

Yet I knew where such a foolish hunger would lead.

Instead I focused on that horrid burning stench in my nose, so similar to the claw I’d cast into the kitchen fire.

So similar as I slipped my hand into the voyav’s, pulling them along.

Following that urge, hoping I could find something before we’d need to help Kat.

Hoping she hadn’t got into any bother. The quicker we found something, the quicker we could leave.

The faint scent guided me until I reached a nondescript door, going for the knob only for it to remain stiff in my hand. Locked.

‘It’s here,’ I hissed, turning to find Thean contemplating the door. Reaching out to drag a finger along the frame. Something working in those sharp amber eyes. ‘How can two things be here at the same time?’

Was Kat on a wild goose chase? Had we found it first or was this something else?

‘The old mad bastard was a hoarder,’ they offered. ‘It’s warded against spells.’

‘I can change.’ It would be easy enough, but then those strange eyes darted to my own.

Thean’s eyes flashed, their grip tightening on my hand. ‘You’re not going in there naked.’

While I seethed at being told what to do, I also did not like the idea of being found naked in a room with no idea of what – or who – was in it … I relented.

‘Fine. You can,’ I offered sharply, resting my hands on my hips in frustration. ‘You can use my blood.’

Thean seemed to go tense at the suggestion but it was their own bastard fault for giving me commands.

A chatter of voices echoed down the dark hallway, coming towards us.

I grabbed their arm, pulling them with me into the alcove that led to a small office some fool had left open. It appeared there was nothing to steal but some tobacco and papers. I shut the door, turning the rusty lock. A large dusty window let moonlight fill the space.

Then I had a moment of panic, biting my lip as I looked down at my bracelet-covered wrists. Knowing the marks that lay beneath. The skin too damaged, and then there was my throat. Only that could be seen too.

‘Little nightmare,’ the voyav asked as if concerned I’d lost my mind. Maybe I had.

I pressed myself back against the desk and reached for my thin silk skirt, pulling it up. I’d drawn enough blood to know where was best as I revealed the smooth skin of my inner thigh.

‘Here,’ I commanded.

‘Alma—’ They almost seemed to choke on the word. Their eyes the most unguarded I’d ever seen them. As if I’d shocked them.

‘Now,’ I snapped, voice too unsteady with an anticipation that set my heart fluttering in my chest. As soon as we found something we could get out of here, and I could get Kat away from this mess.

My heart began to riot in my chest, as if one of my smaller winged beasts was trapped within my ribcage. We didn’t have long. I didn’t have long until I found my sanity again and realised the recklessness of what I was doing.

The voyav seemed to see that, and where I thought they’d mock or tease, a different flash of emotion crossed their features.

A madness consumed me as they sank to their knees before me.

As those amber eyes didn’t leave my own.

Awaiting some refusal from me or further permission.

I didn’t know, could do nothing but give the barest nod as I felt the warmth of their fingers run up the delicate skin of my leg.

Curling around my thighs as if they were something beautifully delicate.

My breath caught, their touch like kindling to a fire in me I knew never led to anything good.

The torment of the whisper of their breath against my flesh, unsteady as if this was also too much for them to bear.

Then their tongue ran across my flesh in a sensuous caress, my fingers tangling mindlessly in their hair. They hesitated. Head tilting for the barest of moments as if to relish in that touch.

Then their teeth bit down and feral pleasure tore through me, my fingers holding them closer. Wishing those lips were inches higher. I urged my hips closer, a sound clawing up my throat that thankfully wasn’t unfamiliar in a place like this.

Thean’s fingers dug into my thigh, greedily.

Taking another pull of that blood even though I knew they didn’t need it.

Gentle and reassuring, as their fingertips brushed my skin in the softest caress.

As if testing a limit. Their nose dragging over my flesh with their retreat.

A hesitation in them. Unable to let go. They rose, my hands still limply resting on their shoulders as I tried to catch my breath.

Feeling the warm trickle of blood, how it reminded me of that warmth between my thighs. Unhinged desire at their mere touch.

Their eyes were jet-black with nothing but an amber ring. Like some starved beast. Then I saw the blood on their lips, painting their sharp masculine mouth red and I’d never felt hunger like it.

I pushed myself closer, pressing my lips against their own, tongue dragging over their lip. Needing to taste it. Any part of me on them. The copper tang of my blood. Surprise flashed in their eyes, so surprised they shifted back into female form and I kissed them again. Deeper and harder.

The hunger not abating. No matter the form they took.