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CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE

I was worried about Rath—worried that removing the spiky, slimy thing that had been Milas James had hurt him.

But aside from being hoarse and having a scratchy throat, he seemed to have survived the experience of being possessed remarkably well.

Physically, anyway. Emotionally, it was a whole different problem.

Not that he talked to me about it—he just withdrew. After coming back to himself, he made sure I was okay, his eyes lingering on my throat and my wrist where Milas James had used his body to grab and choke me. Then he had gone back to his own house without another word.

That had been three days ago.

At first, I figured Rath just needed some time to himself. I gave him space because—to be honest—I needed some time too. Sebastian and I were both kind of banged up.

I had been spending a lot of time on the couch cuddling my cat and thanking him for saving my life as I stroked his soft fur. He got a lot of tuna packed in oil and I had plenty of hot tea and more of my Grandma’s excellent vegetable soup. It was very soothing and healing.

At last I began to feel better. The black door was gone from my house and the upstairs hallway no longer ended in a corner. Milas James was gone for good—but the damage he had done lingered on. The damage to my relationship with my Heartmate, I mean.

After three days of not hearing from the big Orc, I was getting restless. Surely he must be feeling better by now? I hoped so, anyway.

“He’s probably mad at me,” I told Sebastian.

After all, it was my family curse that had gotten him possessed. It must have been a horrible experience and I wouldn’t be surprised or upset if he blamed me for it—well, not very upset, I amended to myself.

Previously, I had tried calling his cell phone and texting him, but he hadn’t answered and I didn’t persist because I didn’t want to push him.

By the third day after the possession, though, I was fed up with waiting.

If he wanted to break up with me, fine, but he needed to say so—in person.

And since he wasn’t coming to me, I was going to go to him.

I spent most of the day making another one of my Grandma’s apple pies. I let it cool a little while I changed into a pretty blue dress that hugged my curves and complimented my eyes. Then I took the oversized pie and made my way across the lawn to Rath’s house.

The big Orc’s home was built in the same style as my Grandma’s, but on a larger scale. It was set beside and back from her property, almost hidden by a couple of huge old Maple trees decked out in gorgeous red and gold leaves.

I marched up the front porch steps and carefully used my elbow to ring the doorbell. I had my hands full of the pie—which was a big one due to the oversized pie plate.

At first I thought he wasn’t going to answer. I rang the doorbell again and then kicked the door—(it was dark green, in case you’re wondering.)

“Rath!” I shouted, wincing just a little.

My throat was still slightly sore from being choked, but at least the bruises Milas James had put on me were fading.

“Rath, I know you’re in there and I’m not leaving until you talk to me!

” I yelled. “I brought you a pie!” I added, hoping that he would come to the door for that, even if he wasn’t inclined to see me otherwise.

At last the huge front door creaked open. Rath was standing there, dressed only in a pair of gray sweatpants and a frown.

“What are you doing here?” he said gruffly. “Why would you want to come over here?”

“To see you, of course,” I said as lightly as I could. “Look, this pie is really heavy—can I come in and set it down?”

He looked at the pie and then lower, at my wrist—the one Milas James had made him grab and twist. The bruises there weren’t fading quite so fast—you could still see five finger-shaped marks clearly on my pale skin.

“Yeah, come in,” he muttered at last, stepping back from the door. “If you really want to.”

“Of course I do.”

I walked past him into his house. It was bachelor neat and sparsely decorated—you could tell a guy on his own lived there.

I had been in the big Orc’s home before, of course—though we tended to hang out in my Grandma’s house—my house—more.

Partially because my place was just more cozy, I thought.

Rath’s house was huge and everything in it was almost twice the size of a normal human residence.

It always made me feel like a little kid when I walked through his home.

I passed through the living room with its huge brown leather sofa.

There was a fire crackling in the enormous fireplace, which was nice.

The dining room had a vast round wooden table and three heavy chairs—the fourth was the one at my Grandma’s place.

Rath had told me he’d brought it over so the two of them could eat meals together.

“She loved to feed people and of course, being an Orc and a guy, I love to eat. Plus, I really enjoyed her company,” he had told me when I asked about the chair.

I felt a little twinge of sadness now when I thought of how he hadn’t come to sit in that chair and eat a meal with me in what felt like forever. But I told myself to be patient—maybe he needed a little more time before he felt ready to come to my place again.

I finally made it to his kitchen, which was a vast space with gray granite countertops that came up to my chest. I struggled to lift the heavy glass pie plate up to put it on the counter and Rath was suddenly there.

“Here, let me.”

He took the pie from my hands and put it on the counter.

“Thank you,” I told him. “I swear I used half a tree’s worth of apples in there!”

Instead of answering, he grabbed my right hand—gently, though—and turned it over, looking at the finger-shaped bruises that encircled my wrist.

“God!” I heard him mutter and his face was twisted with something like loathing.

“Rath?” I looked up at him uncertainly. “Are you okay?”

“Am I okay? Of course not!” He released my hand abruptly and walked away to look out his kitchen window.

“Are you mad at me?” I asked bluntly. There was no use putting it off—this was a discussion we needed to have. “Because if you are, I completely understand,” I went on quickly. “After all, it was my family curse so it’s my fault you got, er, possessed.”

“You think I’m mad at you?” He whirled around to face me, his golden eyes incredulous.

“Well, yes ,” I said hesitantly. “I mean, I should have warned you about the black door and about Milas James. Although to be fair, I had just figured out what the family curse was myself earlier that day,” I went on. “I just?—”

“Baby, you’re the one who ought to be mad at me!” He came back across the kitchen. Cupping my cheek, he tilted my face to one side and studied my bruised neck. “Look what I did to you—I fucking hate myself.”

“ You didn’t do it—Milas James did!” I exclaimed. “That’s the evil Witch Hunter who possessed you—the one who had been tormenting my family for centuries,” I added, since I had never gotten a chance to talk to him about the details of the curse up until now.

“Oh, I know who he is—I know all about him. I learned everything when he put down roots inside me and took over my body,” he said grimly.

“And I’m so, so sorry for that!” I said earnestly.

“Look, I was on my way back from The Red Lion with some candles to try and do a banishing spell to get rid of him. I thought you were going to be gone long enough for me to take care of it before you got back. I never dreamed you’d show up and get possessed like that!

” I bit my lip. “I guess it was pretty bad, huh?”

“Pretty bad?” He ran a hand through his thick black hair.

“It was fucking horrible. I could see everything I was doing—everything he was making me do—but I couldn’t stop any of it!

I could feel myself choking you… hurting you and I knew he wanted to kill you.

I thought…I thought I was going to fucking murder you because I couldn’t fucking stop myself! ”

His voice broke on the last few words and I was startled to see that his golden eyes were suspiciously bright.

“So…you’re not mad at me, then?” I asked, hoping for clarification.

“No! I’m mad at myself!” He pounded one big fist on the granite countertop, making the pie plate jump and rattle. “I should have been stronger! I shouldn’t have let him in—should have kept him from making me hurt you!”

“Rath, you couldn’t help it—it was the curse. It was Milas James!” I said earnestly. “He did that over and over again—he possessed ten of my male ancestors and killed them all. I’m just happy you’re alive after what you went through!”

He shook his head.

“I don’t see how you can be so forgiving after what I did to you.”

“Because it wasn’t you who did it. And because I know you never would do anything like that under any other circumstances—you’ve always been so careful not to hurt me, ever since we got to know each other,” I pointed out.

“You’re so little…so fragile.” He stroked my hair. “Hurting you like that just about fucking killed me, baby.”

Standing on my tiptoes, I reached up and took his face in my hands.

“I love you, Rath—you’re my Heartmate. Of course I don’t blame you for what happened. Of course I forgive you…if you forgive me.”

“Oh, baby…” He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me to him. “There’s nothing to forgive—not on your end,” he whispered into my hair. “I’ve been sitting over here thinking you probably never wanted to see me again,” he added, nuzzling my cheek with his own.

I gave a laugh that was more than a half sob.

“I was thinking the same thing! I thought for sure that you’d blame me for you getting possessed.”

“No, baby—it wasn’t your fault.” He cuddled me close for a moment and then drew back to look down into my eyes. “I just still feel so bad about those bruises I left on you!”

I lifted my chin.