Page 101 of Switch!

“Why not both?” I ask on my way to the kitchen. After pulling on the drawer filled with mail, I tilt it until the rollers slide free from the rails and carry it to the couch.

An hour later, we have a half-empty box of pizza between us. Most of the mail is open and organized into rows. I’ve already thrown away all the advertisements. The rest is mostly overdue bills. There isn’t much that’s personal aside from a birthday card from earlier in the year.

“Mom says she loves me, even though I don’t call enough,” I report. “And she sent this.” I wave a fifty-dollar bill in the air.

“Ooh!” Trixie says. “Nice!”

“It’s another pizza or two,” I say.

“We can make it stretch for longer than that,” Trixie replies. “Especially if we go to a grocery store. We probably should.”

“Why?” I ask, leaning over to see what she’s working on. “Is that his bank account?”

She nods and turns the laptop so I can see the screen better. I don’t need her to explain. The sum at the top is a red number with a minus in front of it.

“Crap. I was hoping he was secretly loaded so we could pay some of these bills.”

“What’s the damage?” Trixie asks, eying the rows of letters.

“We have two more weeks until the electricity is turned off, he’s three months behind on his cable and internet, so that might stop working at any second, and he’s already gotten two eviction notices.”

“No wonder he’s suicidal,” Trixie says with a grimace. “He probably felt like he didn’t have any other option.”

“I’m not sure that was the reason,” I say, sifting through the memories I have access to. “It’s more like he let everything go because it stopped mattering to him. Some of these late notices offer an installment plan, but he never took them up on it. I don’t think he cared enough.”

Trixie sighs. “And I was just starting to like this place.” She looks around. Then she shrugs. “Oh well. We should probably bail once this ship really starts sinking.”

“Just let it all fall apart?”

“Yeah. You’re better off starting from scratch. A zero is better than a hole.” Trixie scrunches up her nose. “Although they do look alike. We can both find jobs and get a new place in my name instead.”

“Where would we live until then?”

“Shelters,” Trixie says matter-of-factly. “Some of them aren’t so bad.”

It’s the closest she’s come to admitting her situation. I’m glad she trusts me enough to be so open, but the idea doesn’t sit right with me. “He needs stability. That kept coming up in my counselling sessions. Routine is important.”

Trixie seems confused. “You’re talking about Patrick?”

“Yeah. Who else?”

“From the sound of things, he’s happier in the black box. You explained what’s up and he’s not asking to be let out, right? He hasn’t told you to stop controlling his body. This is going to sound cold, but he was basically done with it anyway.”

“Because of the suicide attempt,” I say with a nod. “I’ve had similar thoughts. He doesn’t want to live and I do, so maybe this is the best arrangement. For now. But what if something happens and I have to leave him? You know what he’ll do, and I’m not okay with that. We need to get his life back on track. Maybe then he’ll actually want to live.”

Trixie tilts her head and smiles. “Sweet! This is going to be our firstQuantum Leapadventure together.”

“Huh?”

“Quantum Leap. Remember that show? In every episode, the main character gets transported into a new body. I don’t remember why. Some sort of science mishap. Anyway, each of those lives has a problem that Scott Bakula has to figure out before he gets teleported into the next body.”

“Sounds weird.”

Trixie raises an eyebrow while gnawing on pizza crust.

“I know. My entire life is weird. I don’t want to make a career of this though. If we can help Patrick, that’s enough for me.”

“We better start looking for jobs then,” Trixie says with a swallow. “How big are those debts exactly?”