Page 4 of Sweet Temptation (Love & Legacy #1)

LEXIE

You don’t always need a plan.

It’s okay to close your eyes and breathe and trust that everything will work out.

—Lexie’s Secret Thoughts

S leep isn’t something that’s ever come easily for me.

A shrink would have a field day with my messed-up thoughts.

Well... a new shrink. The one my parents took me to after my diagnosis was too stupid to realize I was keeping most of my thoughts to myself and feeding her what she wanted to hear because what kid wants to talk about their death.

Not me, that was for sure.

I still remember the sound of Mom’s sobs at night whenever I was sick.

They’re burned into the molecular makeup of my DNA.

You never forget the sound of your mom’s whispers to your dad in the hushed night as he holds her.

.. crying that you can’t die. That she can’t lose you .

That her biggest fear is you not waking up.

Of course, my father, the former Navy SEAL with the strong belief he can protect us all from anything, promised her time and time again that he’d never let that happen.

But we all knew it was a promise he couldn’t keep.

What they didn’t know all those nights in the hospitals was that I was awake while they sat in the corner and talked in whispered darkness because my biggest fear mirrored theirs.

Endless darkness where I never wake up.

Forever caught in permanent night.

I know I’m going to die.

We all will . . . someday.

My someday will just be earlier than others.

Even the new miracle drug isn’t an option for me. Guess I’m one of the lucky few who’s allergic to something in the compound. Yay to messed-up genetics, for sure. Guess my aversion to sleep makes some sense.

Quietly, I pad down the long hall past closed doors, careful not to wake Linc or Lucky as I walk through the dark house.

Muscle memory takes over, and hundreds of nights sleeping here when we were little come into play.

My grandparents would always take us for the night or weekend or sometimes a week, if Mom and Dad were out of town or on a date.

Late nights with scary movies and too much popcorn were always my excuse if anyone ever caught me in this kitchen, but as I make my way into it tonight, a smile tugs at my lips, because for now.

.. this is my kitchen. No excuses needed for a midnight snack.

I don’t have to explain myself to anyone.

I step through the door and stop and stare at the bare-chested, big-bodied intruder of my peace as he closes the refrigerator door with a carton of orange juice in his hand. “What are you doing up?”

So much for no excuses.

“What are you doing half naked?” Okay, deflection is usually a better option than lying.

I step around the wooden island and grab a copper-bottomed pan from the shelf.

When we were little, and this was Grandpa’s house, I always thought the worn wooden beams along the vaulted ceiling and matching island were weird.

They had dents and scrapes and didn’t match the cream cabinets.

It didn’t matter to me that the open shelves were the same wood, or that the stone was imported from some far away place.

What I now see as beautiful, I only saw as strange.

I guess spending a year in Europe gives a very different perspective on beauty because now I see history and stunning artistry in each beam.

I see my grandmother’s beautiful pots and pans she left for us to use as she and Grandpa travel the world.

I see so many memories, and some of them include the ridiculously handsome man in front of me.

Lucky moves into the dim glow of the pendant light above the sink, his golden skin inked and shining against the quiet night.

So much skin. His arms and chest and quads I can now see without the table blocking my view.

The ones barely covered by black boxer briefs.

The same ones with muscles bigger than my head.

“Wasn’t expecting you to be down here inspecting my wardrobe, Lex. ”

My eyebrow shoots up as I force myself around him, careful not to touch any of the miles of toned muscle, and open the fridge.

Linc and Lochlan walk around in boxers all the time. Always did.

But they never looked like that . “Whatever, Beneventi.”

With his arms crossed over his thick chest, Lucky leans back against the counter and watches me. It’s infuriating. “Eggs, huh? You baking?”

I turn around and drop my found stash on the counter. “What if I am?”

Maybe I don’t need to be so combative, but damn, he always brings it out in me.

“My ma always bakes when she can’t sleep,” he offers, and the shit’s voice softens with the mention of Amelia. “Why can’t you sleep, Lex?”

I ignore the question and pull out a mixing bowl. “Want an omelet?”

“It’s two a.m. . . .”

“Holy shit. You can tell time. I guess that degree wasn’t just earned by the cheerleaders you screwed as payment for your homework, after all.” I crack two eggs and grab a whisk. “Last chance. Do you want some?”

Lucky pulls himself up onto the counter so I’m eye level with his abs, all eight of them, and watches me. It’s unnerving. “Sure. I’ll take some. You adding cheese?”

“Nope. Just eggs. Trust me. A great omelet doesn’t need anything else.” At least not one I eat. Cheese and milk aren’t good for me. “And no ketchup, Beneventi.”

He arches a brow with a slow nod, like he’s examining my words with a magnifying glass, making him harder to ignore. Good thing I’ve spent years ignoring Lucky Beneventi.

“So why’d you come back?” he asks as I get to work.

Ouch . That hurt. “Wow. Tell me how you really feel.”

“I didn’t mean it like that.” His voice softens again. “I guess after you and Brea graduated, and you both stayed there... I don’t know... I wasn’t sure you were coming back.”

Once the eggs are in the pan, and I have a reason to turn away from him, I decide to go with the truth for maybe the first time in one of my middle-of-the-night interrogation sessions. “I thought about staying away... It was nice not being me over there.”

“What do you mean?” He hops down off the counter and grabs two plates from a shelf. “Who were you?”

I continue to work the eggs, hiding my face from the scrutiny making my cheeks flame.

“I wasn’t the sick girl everyone worried about.

My instructors didn’t care if I missed a class.

It was up to me to make it up. They didn’t care why or how.

They just cared that I learned whatever I missed.

The places I staged didn’t go easy on me because I have CF. ”

“What’s staged?” he asks as he adds forks to our plates and watches while I cut our omelet in half and slide the much larger portion onto his plate.

“It’s like an internship where you learn from the best restaurants in the world but don’t get paid.

” I shouldn’t watch as he breaks off his first bite of the eggs, but I do, wanting to see him enjoy it.

Wanting the affirmation I get when he moans.

Oh man... actually moans. And damn, it sounds good coming from him.

Why does Lucky Beneventi have to be the biggest manwhore I’ve ever known? Not that I’m looking for a boyfriend, or worse, a husband. What’s the point? But a little fun never hurt anyone, and if half of Kroydon Hills hadn’t already had fun with Lucky, he’d be exactly who I’d want to have fun with.

“Holy shit, Lex. That’s fucking good.”

I hide my smile and take a bite, like his words didn’t just soothe my soul. “Good. Wear pants next time, and I’ll make it for you again.”

Saylor

What time are we moving you in?

Aurora

I just got my nails done. We’re not actually moving anything, right? Just ogling Linc’s hot baller buddies.

Lexie

You’re related to most of those buddies, sleeping beauty.

Aurora

Saylor

Not all of them

Lexie

How much stuff do you think I have to move? It’s legit just my bedroom furniture and my kitchen stuff.

Brea

Lies. I’ve lived with you. You have a shit-ton of clothes and shoes.

Elodie

And blankets.

Dillan

And books.

Lexie

Okay, Dillan. Like you’re not everyone’s favorite smut dealer.

Dillan

Romance, Lexicon. Use your words. Romance.

Elodie

When is the store opening, Dillan?

Dillan

Hopeless Romantics should be open by the end of September, if all goes the way it should.

Aurora

Have we picked the next book club read?

Dillan

I sent you the link last week. It’s the new S.J. Sylvis hockey book. I’ve met the author, and she’s a sweetheart.

Lexie

It’s the fall. Shouldn’t we be reading football?

Dillan

We live it. Isn’t that enough?

Lexie

Truth.

Saylor

Helloooo – back to the question of the day. What time are we moving you in?

The door alarm chimes, and my brother’s voice carries up the stairs.

Lexie

Pretty sure the guys are here now. Why don’t you come tomorrow? We can BBQ. I just want to take it easy today and chill.

Aurora

You feeling okay?

Lexie

Right as rain. Come tomorrow. BYOB and I’ll cook the rest.

Dillan

You and your rain addiction.

Lexie

Rain is sexy. I stand by that thought. See you tomorrow.

“ D on’t drop that box. My baby’s inside. ” Holding my breath doesn’t come naturally for me, but that’s exactly what I do as I watch Ryker Beneventi carry my baby into the kitchen.

“You have a kid behind my back, Lex?” Ryker signs and asks after he sets the box on the counter. “I thought you were waiting for me.”

Linc smacks his chest and shoves him away from me. “No making babies with my sister, asshole.”

Ryker’s smirk is immediate as he throws an arm around my shoulder, and Linc groans.

I shimmy out from under his massive hold and glare.

“Of course, I’m waiting for you, handsome,” I tease directly in front of him so he can read my lips without me signing as well, avoiding my brother’s attention.

“But in the meantime...” I open the box and carefully take out my baby. “This will have to do.”

She’s a beautiful baby pink KitchenAid mixer. The biggest one they sell. She’s been with me for years, and I love her most. “If you’re nice, I’ll make you cookies later.”

Lucky drops a box on the counter, and the kitchen tools clang inside as they hit the butcher block. His bright baby blues swing from his cousin to me, annoyance tugging at his brow. “Your eggs are better.”

“You made him eggs?” Ryker pouts while the mention of last night forces a flush to my cheeks as I curse this damn small town and how well everyone knows everything...

Speaking of... my best friend strolls through the door like she didn’t just get in on the red-eye. “Don’t feel up the mixer, Lex. It’s gross. I can buy you a new vibrator if you need it.”

“Dude, Brea... stop,” Linc groans before he kisses the top of her head. “Missed you.”

I fake a gag. “Please, sweet baby Jesus, don’t start hooking up with my brother again.”

Linc licks his lips, and Brea shoves him away. “We’re not.”

Sure they won’t.

It doesn’t get more on-again, off-again than those two.

“Now point me to what you want unpacked.” She waves to the Beneventi boys as they walk out of the room and peeks inside the box with my tools. “Are we starting in here or your room?”

Mom walks in and drapes her arms around Brea and me.

“Oh, we’re starting in here. The boys are bringing in your furniture, and Linc just cursed out Lucky while Daddy laughed.

These boys move men bigger than houses on a football field each week, but give them a teeny tiny dresser, and someone’s fingers always get smashed. ”

“Watch it. Fuck .” Linc’s voice is followed by a thud, then a groan, and Mom, Brea, and I all laugh.

Looks like we’re starting in the kitchen.

“ S o... Want to tell me what’s going on?”

I look across the island at Brea adding sugar to her already sweet coffee and snatch away the cream I know she’s reaching for next. “What do you mean?”

“Don’t play dumb with me, Lexicon. I know how smart you are. You’ve been quiet all day. You are a lot of things, Lex. Quiet isn’t one of them. You’ve been home for what... twenty-four hours? You’re already out of your parents’ house. At least one of your roommates is hot. How bad can it be?”

“The one you think is hot is my brother.” I give in and shove the cream her way and grab my oven mitts as the timer goes off behind me. “I guess I’m not sure what’s bugging me. I can’t quite place the unsettled feeling.”

She shrugs and pours way too much cream into her mug. “The other one is my cousin. So of course, Linc is the hot one. Eww.”

“Because I am the hot one,” Linc agrees as he and Lucky walk into the kitchen, the last of my furniture and bags moved in and unpacked earlier in the day. “Now, what smells so good?”

Saved by the obnoxious brother.

I guess it’s better than a bell.

“You know you don’t live here, right?” Lucky plucks a cookie off the piping-hot tray and winces as it burns his tongue. “Damn. This is good, Lex.”

“Thanks. I wanted to drop some off at Jamie and Ryker’s place as a thank you for helping me today.”

“Chew with your mouth closed,” Brea snaps and smacks his hand when he goes back for a second cookie. “And I’m aware I don’t live here, you ass. Because you fuckers all think your parents are so strict, but none of them hold a candle to mine.”

“Sucks to be you, princess.” Lucky darts around her and manages to snag another cookie before he winks at me. “What are you guys doing for dinner?”

Linc opens the fridge and pulls out a tray of chicken. “Uhh... am I supposed to be grilling this?”

My brothers are such good guys, but sometimes I swear they’re a little slow.

I take the tray from his hands and head for the back door. “Nope. I am.”