Page 22 of Summer Skin

CHASE WAS DREAMINGof her again. His mother. Her laughter carrying down the hallway as he relentlessly tried to squeeze a too-small shoe onto his left foot.

As he slowly blinked awake, the image of her wine-stained lips echoed through his head as the last of the day’s golden strands of sunlight beamed into his bedroom.

Lazily padding to the window, he tugged the sash closed. Brooklyn was out there, sitting cross-legged on the lawn. The neighbor’s cat butted its head against her arm, seeking affection.

A few minutes later he folded himself down beside her. “Whatcha doing?”

She held up a white puffball of dandelion, rolling her eyes in the same way she used to do in the backseat of the car, when their mom tried to rally some enthusiasm for another new town.

“Making a wish. Always wish on the first star you see at night. In a tunnel while holding your breath. On any dandelion ready to fly,” she said, quoting their mother.

“What will you wish for? Maybe you should ask for a car. You do turn sixteen next month.”

She sent him a flat look. “Waste of a wish. That would never come true. Honestly, I think Aunt Colleen’s so far into her Xanax and gin lately she hardly notices we’re still around.”

Chase had noticed the same. Colleen seemed unhappy in a way that money couldn’t fix. He wondered if it was a family curse—if somewhere deep down they all knew they didn’t fit in on this earth. He wondered what Colleen had been like when she was young. If light had ever burned bright in her eyes, like his mom.

“At least she and Lars aren’t total assholes,” Brooklyn went on. “It could be worse. They’re doing the best they can for two people who wanted French poodles for children.”

“We’re the mutts they were never expecting.”

Brooklyn was quiet for a moment. Rolling the dandelion head softly back and forth over the skin of her palm. “I’m thinking of talking to mom.”

“Really?” he asked. A tiny shock made his heart skip a beat.

“I miss her.”

“Me too. But …” He didn’t know how to put his feelings into the right-shaped words. All the anger and fear and love crashing around in his chest at the same time.

“Are you going to ignore her forever?” she asked.

“Not forever. But it still hurts too much. And calling her in prison feels weird.”

“I get that.” She raised the dandelion to his mouth. “Close your eyes. Make a wish. Without thinking. Quick.”

I wish we grew up safe.

He blew.

“Think it will come true?” Brooklyn wondered.

“Not a chance.”

But at least we grew up loved.

“Will you tell Mom …” He hesitated, trying to figure out exactly what was fair to say. “Tell her I love her. And I need more time.”

“Okay.”

Brooklyn plucked another dandelion from the lawn. She closed her eyes, whispering a secret under her breath. Her lips pursed and the seeds blew away like a wish on the flame of a birthday cake.

“Think yours will come true?” he asked.

She smiled. A line of pearl-white teeth.

“Absolutely.”

***

Aven pulled into the drive around nine p.m., leaning on his horn like some dickhead straight out of a teen romcom.

School was out. Forever. And that night Heidi was throwing one last open mic before she left for LA, trading evergreen for palm trees.

It wasn’t long after the party started that she called Chase and Aven up to the stage, where they played a loud and rowdy version of something they’d been working on nearly all year.

A high soared through Chase as the music flowed through his fingertips. Aven’s hand cupped around the mic, eating it up, his hyped vibe matching the energy of the swarm of people crowded on the lawn. The loud applause and hollering kept going even as they stepped from the stage. There was nothing else quite as exhilarating as playing live with Aven.

The evening was warm for June, and people were fluttering around the party like there was a bit of magic in the air—the sweet promise of sunshine and summer just around the bend.

But there was a lingering tension between Chase’s shoulder blades. Uncertainty over what was soon to come. Aven was fully swaddled in the idea of rooming in Seattle together on his parent’s dime. But no matter how many times Chase attempted to relax into the plan, resistance tugged at his gut. He couldn’t make it right in his head.

“Hey.” Aven poked a finger into his side, digging in a little until Chase yelped and let out a laugh, pushing him away. “You okay? What’s going on in that brain of yours?”

Chase smiled. Aven was watching him with those honey-sweet eyes. He wanted to lose himself in them, to let the uncertainty of their future go. He was sick of worrying. They’d figure a way to work it out. “I want to dance,” he said.

“With me?”

“No, with Piper. I’ve heard she gives great blowjobs.”

“Very funny, bonehead.”

“Come over here,” he said, motioning Aven with his finger. “Dance with me.”

The corners of Aven’s mouth lifted, and he wrapped his arms around Chase’s waist as their hips met. Elena was up at mic belting out Miley Cyrus’s “Wrecking Ball” like it was her own personal therapy session. Aven mouthed the words of the song and Chase watched him, his heart light, and he was more sure than ever.

He was in love.

“I love you,” Aven said, as though he could read Chase’s thoughts. His hand at the small of Chase’s back drew him even closer.

“Love you, too.”

Elena finished up to a roar of applause, and Aven gave him a quick kiss, pulling away from Chase’s embrace. “I’m gonna grab a drink. You want anything?”

He shook his head.

“Be back in a sec,” Aven promised, sliding away through the crowd.

“Nice set tonight.”

Chase turned his head and did a double take. It was Jake, the school’s “missing” quarterback who Brooklyn currently theorized was locked in Miss Johnson’s basement, being used as a sex toy.

“So, about your sister.”

Chase tensed for a lecture on their fake investigation. “What about her?”

Jake shrugged, taking a pull from his beer. “Just seen her staring at me in the cafeteria sometimes, is all. She’s cute.”

Chase’s jaw nearly dropped. Jake wasn’t missing, but something equally sinister was afoot. Jake had a boner for his sister. His sister. Who, as far as Chase was concerned, was barely out of diapers. He wasn’t at all ready for boys—or anyone—to pay that sort of attention to her.

“She’s fifteen.”

“Woah, okay.” Jake held a hand in the air, a gesture of innocence. “Never mind. She looks older.”

“Well, she’s not.”

“Gotcha. Forget I said anything.”

He gave Chase a little two finger salute and quickly bounded away.

One last twist wrenched his gut over thinking of anyone messing with Brooklyn’s heart, but Chase shook it off, standing on his toes to stare over the crowd at the group of people lounging around the makeshift drink station.

He didn’t see Aven anywhere.

Off to one side of the house, by a gigantic bounce castle, Andi was gesturing wildly to Piper and Elena. A girl pushed past them as she exited the inflatable fortress, her pale face looking a little nauseated. Chase would bet money on someone cleaning up buckets of puke from inside the princess-themed walls by the end of the night.

Winding his way over to them, Chase stopped short when he heard Aven’s name.

“Who’s Aven been talking to on the phone for so long?” Piper asked curiously.

Andi bit at her thumbnail. “I think it’s his mom.”

“Ohhh.” The fervor in Piper’s tone rose. “About Chase again?”

“What about Chase?” asked Elena.

Piper turned and Chase followed her gaze, finding Aven leaning against the side of the house with his phone to his ear, one hand wound tightly in his hair, an intensity in the way he scowled off into the distance.

“Aven’s mom thinks Chase is the reason he’s been slacking off so much this year,” Piper said, filling her in. She glanced back at Aven. “You know, like dumping his after-school activities, quitting the gym, not pulling straight A’s and all that. Now Chase is the reason Aven won’t do prom, and why he’s refusing to go to graduation dinner with his family.”

Brutal heat sprung to life in Chase’s cheeks as all those miserable moments he’d spent thinking the exact same thing rushed back to him. How many times had he wondered how Aven hadn’t figured out that tying himself to Chase could sink his ship?

The girls all exchanged glances and Chase’s heart pounded in his ears. “Aven’s whole family is going off on how he’s dragging him down,” Piper went on.

“He’s not though!” Andi protested vehemently. “Aven and I made a pact last summer to only do what we wanted senior year. Our last year here. Aven chose what was important to him—his music. Chase is good for Aven. He mellows him out. And Aven … he loves Chase so much. There’s no bad in that.”

She shook her head, a frown creasing her face. Then suddenly, “Aven!” she shouted, her hands cupped around her mouth. “Piper is over here saying Hank and his dumbass friends are keying your car!”

“Oh, shit,” Elena said. “For serious?”

“No!” Andi hissed. “I’m just getting him off the phone. Aven, get over here!”

Aven turned toward the girls, his brow crinkling. He mumbled something and then shoved the phone into his back pocket, hurrying in their direction.

And there was no way. No fucking way Chase could face him right now. Not after all his fears, the absolute worst thoughts that kept him awake at night, had jumped to life.

Darting inside Heidi’s house, he hid before Aven could spot him.

But he couldn’t keep the tears from falling. Streaks of anguish streaming down his cheeks, he raced for the bathroom before anyone might see. As he neared the hallway, someone rounded the corner and nearly barreled right into him.

“Well, well. We’ve got to stop meeting like this.”

Trent stood in the near-dark with arms crossed over his chest, a lazy smirk on one side of his mouth. He took a closer look at Chase and his expression soured.

“Hm. This again? You know, you’re way too good for him.”

Chase wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. “What?”

“That kid, the arrogant dick who sings for you.”

“Aven?”

“Sure.”

Chase shook his head. Trent didn’t know the half of it. “That’s not even a little bit true.”

“That he’s arrogant?” Trent said, disbelieving.

“That I’m too good for him.” Chase didn’t mention that Aven’s casual arrogance was only part of his charm.

“You think he’s not going to end up in a dull as shit corporate suit married to one of those hometown girls? I’ve known a lot of guys like him. They never wander that far off the path.”

Chase’s eyes strayed to the window to find Aven. Andi’s arms were tangled around his neck as he held her waist, a smile on his face as she swayed toward him. There was no denying the genuine care he had for her. She said something with an amused smirk, and Aven tossed his head back, laughing.

Andi looked like she was the one who belonged in Aven’s arms.

Like they were made for each other.

And maybe, in some ways, they were.

Rich kids. Kids who grew up only flying first class. Whose parents were CEOs and corporate attorneys. Who were dressed in the finest new clothes each season. Chauffeured to dance classes, tennis tournaments, and riding lessons.

Aven and Andi were born with well-bred pedigrees.

And Chase was the child of a man who could care less and a woman who dragged Chase and his sister into her own mental health crisis for far too long. Chase was always going to be the stray mutt Aven brought home because he felt sorry. Because he saw the open vulnerability in Chase’s eyes one day last fall. Because … because he wanted to save Chase in a way that wasn’t possible.

In a way Chase could only save himself.

“Yeah, that guy?” Trent said. “Definitely not worth your tears.”

“Why are you even here?” Chase asked, a little harshly. “Aren’t you supposed to be on tour?”

“Nah. The international shows don’t start until next week. I’m taking Heidi and a U-Haul with all her shit down to LA with me tomorrow.” Trent watched him for a moment. “Been looking for you tonight. I want to ask you something.”

“You do?” Chase’s brows drew together. He never understood why Trent bothered. He wasn’t completely oblivious at this point to Trent’s flirtatious undertones, but he could have nearly anyone he wanted at this party. There was no reason to pay a drop of attention to Chase at all.

“Right, so, Paranormal Romance is shoved into a rough spot. Our guitar player, John? He’s in a bad space and the label dropped him last night. You probably saw how he fucked up a hotel suite and threatened the manager with a knife.” Chase shook his head, oblivious to the rock star drama. “We’ve got our entire international tour booked for the next year and I need someone to play guitar.”

Trent’s gaze shot to Chase.

“I want you to audition in LA.”

Chase took a step backwards, not sure he was understanding correctly. “Say that again?”

“I want you to come on tour with Paranormal Romance.”

“Like, as your guitarist?”

“You play like the devil, you’re hot enough that panties will go flying, and you’re not going to get caught up in any sort of bullshit. You’re not into drugs or anything, right?”

“No.” He thought for a sec. “But I do smoke.”

“Weed’s nothing.”

Chase shook his head. “I meant cigarettes.”

Trent laughed, his entire face lighting up. “Kid, you’re something else.” He looked Chase up and down. “Fuck, the fans are gonna go wild for you. Goddamn eat you alive.”

“What makes you think I’ll even get the gig?” Chase wasn’t so sure.

Trent leaned in close, his unfamiliar scent filling Chase’s senses. “Because you’re the only one I want to play for me. You can drive down with us tomorrow and I’ll fly you back up if it doesn’t work out.”

Chase’s throat bobbed as he swallowed. “And if it does?”

“We leave for Tokyo next week.”

“Shit.”

“It’s your golden ticket. All you’ve gotta do is say yes.”

A golden ticket. A way to not spend the next few years scrambling just to pay rent. He could make sure Brooklyn was taken care of. It was the sort of success musicians fought for years to achieve. Guaranteed money like Chase had never known. Like he might never know if he didn’t leap at this chance.

His gaze shot to Aven, still goofing around with the girls near the bounce house. All these months later, he still struck Chase as near-painfully attractive. Magnetic. Appealing in a way that caused Chase to go a little wild with want.

“Tomorrow’s graduation. I’m supposed to walk with my friends.”

“Or,” Trent said, a lopsided grin on his face, “you skip the ceremony and become famous.”

Fame. The elusive dragon his mother hunted from town to town. Doing this would mean being away from Aven for more than a year. It made him feel sick in his gut. How could he detach himself from the one person who’d held him together this past year?

There was a printed picture of the two of them, a selfie at the old mill, in the same spot where they’d first kissed. Chase had it taped to his nightstand. Every morning, it was the first thing he saw when he opened his eyes.

He’d known from the start that their love would be fleeting. A few seasons in time before life tossed them apart. But this … this changed things. If he left and earned this success, Aven’s family might see him as worthy. As someone who could be a partner for their son. Someone with a name of his own.

And Aven … they’d be equals. Standing on even ground for the first time.

Chase’s heart skittered around in his chest. The idea truly taking flight. If he took this offer, he could end up with Aven for good someday. For always.

Aven’s name like a drumbeat in his head.

Aven’s name like the strum of his very own heart.

He’d never been good enough for Aven Sinclair.

But someday, he could be.

Chase met Trent’s eyes, determined. “When do we leave?” he asked.