Page 17 of Straw and Gold (A Realm of Revelry #2)

Killian

I wasn’t sure how long I laid there.

Long enough to pick up the steady ease of her breathing.

Long enough to settle my body, restless as it had been.

Long enough to hear her hum and turn in her bed.

Long enough to pray to every Goddess in Revelry that I was strong enough to resist moh dhóches.

Long enough to convince myself to close my eyes and attempt to rest when the feel of her lips pressed to mine was the only thing that was ever going to get me through each day to each night from now until the end.

I’d been trapped in my nightmares for years now.

Each night, the sweat and fear.

Each morning, the reassurance in the mirror that I still had time.

Some mornings it was hope.

Some it was nothing more than the constant reminder that I would leave my kingdom a more prosperous one than I’d found it.

That morning, I gripped the sides of the porcelain sink, breathing deep through my nose, exhaling long through my mouth. Sweat dripped from my nose into the basin and my eyes watered at the thought…

But their deaths were fifteen years ago, and I had grown into a different man since then. A different king.

I didn’t need the same things now that I had needed many years before.

Our beds were separate.

Our time together would be brief.

And with whatever Goddessblessed luck I had left, the clever queen would discover my true name in her studies and free me from this torment.

I washed my face and shaved away the overgrown gruff on my face and neck. When I finished, I slid into the bath that was always left for me in the early hours of dawn. I had a servant fill the tub every night and by morning, I could calm myself in the cold water.

The sun would rise in another hour and another day would begin.

Another day of work.

Another day of hope.

Another day closer to the end, one way or another.