Page 57 of Stalked By the Alphas

56

HAZEL

I wake up with a pounding headache, my mouth dry and tasting like something died in it. Groaning, I roll over and fall off the couch, hitting the carpet with a soft thud. That’s when I remember last night. Leah came over, and we drank. A lot.

Squinting against the sunlight already streaming through the windows, I spot Leah curled up in the armchair, still fast asleep. The empty vodka bottle sits on the coffee table next to a half-drunk bottle of wine, a silent testament to our night of… what even was that? Moving on? Forgetting our woes? Celebrating freedom from the prisons of our torment? All of the above?

I push myself up, wincing at the way the room spins. God, I haven’t been this hungover in... well, ever. Stumbling to the kitchen, I gulp down water and fumble for some painkillers. As I swallow them, memories of yesterday come flooding back of Zach in my office, the mind-blowing sex, the guilt and confusion afterwards.

But I can’t think about that right now. I need to make sure Leah is okay, and then I need to hit the shower and go to work. The thought makes my stomach churn, but I shove it aside.

“Hey,” Leah says, coming into the kitchen looking like a ray of sunshine. I scowl at her, and she giggles. “Sorry, me and alcohol have this understanding. It helps me function, and I don’t throw it all back up and ruin its job.”

I nod, getting that on more levels than I’d like. “Yeah, I can see how that is mutually beneficial, but are you okay?”

“I’m not an alcoholic if that’s what you’re asking me. Or at least, I probably am, but a highly functioning one.”

I have no idea what that is, so I nod again and take her word for it. I’m not here to lecture on how to deal with her pain, nor to berate her on drinking to forget. I probably would, too, if I weren’t such a lightweight.

“So what now?” I ask cautiously.

She smiles. “Now we move on with our lives and try to forget, perhaps find something or someone who can help with that.”

“You are really strong, Leah,” I blurt out. “You’re amazing.”

She shrugs. “No, I’m not. I’m faking it. But it’s a start, right?”

“Right. ”

“I’ve got an Uber on the way. Thanks for last night, Hazel. I needed it, and I know you did, too. But let’s not make a habit out of it, okay? Seeing you… I just can’t. I’m sorry. I know it’s selfish and cowardly?—”

“God, no. I get it, Leah. Christ. I seriously get it. It was nice to see you, too, and there aren’t enough thanks in this world to give you for what you did the other day. I won’t… I won’t ever tell anyone…”

“I know. I’m not worried about that. But I have to start healing, and so do you.”

I go to her, and I hug her tightly before stepping back. She didn’t return it, but I don’t take offence. She is dealing with this how she thinks is best for her. I should take a leaf out of her book and fake it til I make it. God knows I could do with smiling and being normal again—whatever that is.

“Bye, Hazel.”

“Bye, Leah.” I watch her go, and she slips out of the front door.

I realise I didn’t even lock and bolt it. I was too drunk to remember or care. It was liberating but not something I can make a habit out of. I’ve neglected my business enough these last few weeks.

With that resolve firmly in place, I smile and head up to the shower. If Leah can do this, then so can I.

Moments later, as I stand under the hot shower, I run my hands over my body and over my pussy. The feel of Zach’s cock thrusting into me, sends shivers over me. I cup myself gently, feeling how bare I am there, and the shiver turns to a shudder as I remember Ayden shaving me. I close my eyes, and the memories of the alphas killing David and Ayden crash through my skull. I want to push it away, pretend I never saw it, but I can’t do that. I need to face it. I let myself remember what I saw, however fuzzy it was, through the haze of shock. The three alphas hurting those who hurt me. This is something that stampedes over all the bad things they did. Even the sex. I slide two fingers over my clit as I think about how it felt to have their knots inside me during my heat. My heart beats quickly, and I pant, teasing myself as I remember. I don’t know who was who or what was what, all I remember are the white masks and the pleasure.

I let myself get lost in the memories and sensations, my fingers working faster as I chase my release. The hot water cascades over me as I lean against the shower wall, legs trembling.

Images flash through my mind of Zach’s intense gaze as he thrust into me yesterday, the feeling of being filled and claimed during my heat, and the alphas’ protective fury as they eliminated the threat to me. It’s all tangled up together. The pleasure, the pain, the fear, the arousal.

With a choked cry, I come hard, my body shuddering. For a few blissful moments, my mind goes blank. But as I come down from the high, the guilt and confusion come crashing back.

What am I doing? How can I be getting off to thoughts of them after everything that’s happened?

Shaking my head, I quickly finish washing and step out of the shower. I need to focus. I have a life to live, and they are not part of it.

I hurry through getting ready, trying to push thoughts of the alphas out of my mind. As I’m about to leave for the bookshop, I pause at the door. For a moment, fear grips me. What if someone is waiting outside? What if David and Ayden weren’t working alone?

I shake my head, forcing those thoughts away. I can’t live my life in fear. I won’t let them win.

Be like Leah. Be like Leah. Leah wasn’t afraid to leave here. Or if she was, she didn’t let it show. Fake it. Fake it.

Taking a deep breath, I open the door and step outside. The morning air is crisp and fresh even though it’s hot out already, helping to clear my head. I start walking towards the bookshop, my steps becoming more confident with each block.

When I arrive, Delia is already there, arranging a display in the window. She looks up as I approach, her kind face creasing with concern.

“Morning, love. Hope you don’t mind that I opened up.”

“No, of course not. You are a godsend.”

She beams. “The kettle’s on if you want a cuppa?”

“Kettle?”

“In the back. It’s cheaper than nipping to Aggie’s tea room every time I want a brew.”

I giggle. “Well, I can’t argue with that. Aggie?”

“Agatha Pemberton.” She points next door.

“Ohh, that’s such a nice name.” I had no idea .

“Apparently, her mum named her after Agatha Christie.”

“I love that!” I say, clapping my hands.

Delia chuckles. “I thought you might appreciate that, being a book lover and all. Now go on and get yourself that tea.”

I nod gratefully and head to the back office. While I’m waiting for the kettle to boil, I hear the bell over the shop door jingle. Delia’s cheerful voice greets a customer, and I feel a sense of normalcy wash over me. This is good. This is what I need.

Mug of tea in hand, I return to the main shop area. An elderly gentleman is browsing the history section while Delia chats with him about recent releases. I smile, feeling a sense of pride in this little haven I’ve created.

I lose myself in the work, grateful for the distraction. But as time ticks away, a familiar tension starts to creep back in.

What if one of the alphas shows up? What if Zach comes back? I’m not ready to face any of them yet, especially not here in my sanctuary.

The shop door opens and my heart leaps into my throat, but it’s just Mrs Tanner from down the street, looking for a birthday gift for her grandson.

I take a deep breath, trying to calm my nerves. This is ridiculous. I can’t keep jumping at every customer who walks through the door. I need to get a grip.

As I help Mrs Tanner find the perfect book, I force myself to focus on the present moment. The smell of old books, the quiet murmur of customers browsing, Delia’s cheerful voice as she rings up a sale. This is my world, and I won’t let fear take it from me.

The day passes quickly, and by closing time, I’m exhausted but feeling more like myself than I have in months. As Delia and I are tidying up, she pauses, giving me a thoughtful look.

“You seem better today, love,” she says gently. “More settled.”

I nod, offering her a small smile. “I’m trying to be.”

She pats my arm. “That’s all any of us can do. One day at a time.”

Her words remind me of Leah’s strength this morning, and I feel a renewed sense of determination. I can do this. I can move forward.

After locking up and saying goodbye to Delia, I start walking home. The late afternoon air is warm and pleasant, and I find myself relaxing as I stroll down the road. But as I approach my house, I freeze.

Leaning against his car, parked in front of my house, is Carter. My heart starts racing, and for a moment, I consider turning around and walking away. But no, this is my home. I won’t let him chase me away from it.

Taking a deep breath, I square my shoulders and march up to him. Carter straightens as he sees me.

“What are you doing here?” I ask, my voice steadier than I feel .

“I wanted to talk to you,” he says softly. “To apologise properly, and I have something for you.”

I eye him warily. “Carter, I don’t think?—”

“Please,” he interrupts. “Just give me five minutes. That’s all I’m asking.”

Part of me wants to tell him to leave, to never come back. But another part, the part that sees him walking down the steps of that cellar to rescue me, wins out.

“Five minutes,” I say finally. “And then you leave.” I cringe when I remember how well that turned out with Zach yesterday. I have to be stronger today or they are all going to get the wrong impression.

Relief washes over his face as he nods. “Thank you.”

I unlock the front door, acutely aware of Carter’s presence behind me. As we enter, I lead him to my office, nice and impersonal, and I place my bag on the desk, turning to face him, keeping my distance.

“Talk.”

“This first. I ordered it the other day, after we came for you.”

He thrusts out a brown enveloped package about the size of a shoe box but lumpy. Frowning at it, I take it, feeling it would be rude to let him hold out a gift for me and not take it from him. It’s lighter than I expected, and I glare at him as I rip the top of the padded envelope open.

I peer inside, and my heart melts into a puddle of goo.

Reaching in, I pull out a stuffed brown bear, all soft and cuddly, with a red ribbon around his neck .

“It’s better looking than that other thing,” he croaks.

I blink, trying to suppress the smile at his distaste for the cam bear.

“And you can cuddle this one. Maybe it will help you feel safer and comforted.”

I clutch the soft bear to my chest, conflicting emotions swirling inside me. Part of me wants to throw it back at Carter and tell him to leave. But even in a few seconds, I can’t bear to part with it, and I know as soon as he leaves here, I will build a nest, crawl into it and give this bear pride of place.

When I look up at him again, he drops to his knees, his head bowed just like Zach yesterday. But this hits me hard. Harder than anything else he could’ve said or done. He is a prime alpha. The strongest of the strong. Alphas don’t kneel before omegas. It’s the other way around. To put his pride and ego aside to do this chokes me up and I bury my nose into the bear’s fur to stop myself from crying again.

“Hazel,” Carter says softly, his voice thick with emotion. “I know we’ve hurt you deeply. All that we have done is unforgivable. We violated your trust, your privacy, your body. There’s no excuse for it. I’m not here to ask for forgiveness. I don’t deserve it. I’m here to tell you how sorry I am, how much I regret my actions. We thought we were protecting you, but we were wrong to assume that you needed or wanted it. We know we were selfish, deceitful and absolute arseholes to you.”

Carter’s words hang heavy in the air between us. I clutch the teddy bear tighter, unsure how to respond .

“Carter,” I say, my voice shaky. “I appreciate your apology, but I don’t know if I can just move past everything that’s happened.”

He nods, still on his knees. “I don’t expect you to. This isn’t about me, Hazel. All I want is for you to know how much I regret these actions and how truly sorry I am.”

I take a deep breath, trying to sort through my jumbled emotions. “Why did you do it? Really? Was it just about control?”

Carter looks up at me, his blue eyes filled with tears which crumbles any sort of defence I’d built up. “No, it wasn’t just about control. We love you, Hazel. We always have. But we went about it all wrong. We let our fear of losing you, our desire to protect you, overshadow everything else. We convinced ourselves we were doing the right thing, but we were just being selfish.”

“I don’t even know what to do with that, Carter,” I admit. “I can’t just forget what happened.”

Carter nods solemnly. “I know, and I wouldn’t expect you to.” He takes a deep breath before continuing. “I’ve done a lot of soul-searching, Hazel. I realised how controlling and manipulative I’ve been, not just with you but in all aspects of my life. I let my parents’ expectations, and my own ego drive me for so long. But I’m done with that now.”

I raise an eyebrow, curious despite my distrust. “What do you mean?”

“I told my parents to go to hell,” he says with a wry smile. “I’m walking away from the family business, from their money and influence. I want to build a life on my own terms.”

His words surprise me. I know how much his career and family legacy means to him. It’s one of many reasons why I left them all to begin with. I’m starting to think maybe I should’ve stuck around and taken the risk. “That’s… big.”

Carter nods. “It is. But it’s the right move. When I found out what my parents had said about you, I knew I was never going to forgive them. It hit home how I’m too much like my father, and that sickens me. I don’t want to be like him, Hazel. I can’t. It’s not really me. I don’t want to be that person anymore who thinks he can control everything and everyone around him. I want to be someone worthy of your trust and love, even if I never earn it back.”

I feel tears pricking at my eyes and blink them back furiously. His sincerity is killing me, but I can’t let myself be swayed so easily.

Or can I?

I’m so tired. Tired of being scared, tired of crying, tired of being lost, tired of being alone.

I stare at him, on his knees, for a long time.

Neither of us says a word.

Eventually, I walk up to him and hand the bear back to him, my hands trembling as I make a decision I might regret, but I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m done.