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THIRTY-SEVEN

At first, he’d cursed the coming storm. It would make it harder for him to continue his mission. But then he realized that with the next offering, it could actually make it easier. She wouldn’t be able to get away. She would be trapped. Of course, he would have to be able to make his escape, but he believed he could do it. He was used to bad weather. It had never stopped him before.

He’d been watching her. Planning. Waiting. That gnawing feeling was becoming stronger, as if it were eating him alive from the inside. He’d called out to his god to help him, but the only answer he received was that until he satisfied the hunger within, things wouldn’t get better for him.

He had to kill her soon. Very soon.

Erin wanted to snap back at Kaely. Throw some kind of pithy response at her. But the truth was, her question was a good one. One she couldn’t answer.

“Look, when I was a kid, I believed in God,” Erin said. “My parents didn’t take me to church, but I went a few times with a friend from school. Until they moved away. The Sunday school teacher had told us that if we prayed, God would hear us. That He answered prayer. So the night of my parents’ accident, I prayed. I prayed they’d live, but they didn’t. I prayed my sister would get off drugs and come home, but she didn’t. So I quit praying.” She sighed. “I’m sure you have some kind of pat response for something like this. But the truth is, what good is a God who ignores prayers? Who leaves someone an orphan at ten years old? If He can’t do any better than that, I’m not interested.”

“I don’t have all the answers, Erin. But I can tell you one thing that is true. God loves you. No matter what it looks like, nothing will ever change that.”

“Sure. He let my parents die, my sister disappear. And He watched while Scott and Sarah were shot to death. Great God you have there.”

“He didn’t cause the accident, Erin. Nor did he force your sister to take drugs. Gang members started the shooting that night Scott and Sarah died. God didn’t do that. There are consequences for actions. No, Scott and Sarah shouldn’t have paid for the actions of those gang members, but God didn’t pull the triggers. You’re blaming Him for things He had nothing to do with. And now, He wants to help you. Don’t you think it’s odd that the only person you’re willing to talk to now is me? One of those Christians you disagree with so much? Has it ever occurred to you that He’s the One who brought us together? That this is His way of reaching out to you when you need Him?” She took a deep breath. “Erin, you’ll never be free if you don’t take a step of faith. Just one step. Don’t worry about the next ones. They’ll come.”

“I don’t know,” Erin said. “I turned my back on God because I believed He let me down.”

“Okay,” Kaely said. “Let me turn this around a bit. I’m certain you were a wonderful police officer. I know this because I’ve come to know you . So, why did that little girl die? Does that mean you were a bad officer? Or did you just want her to die?”

Kaely’s comment felt like a punch in the stomach, and she gasped for air.

“I know that’s not true, Erin,” Kaely said immediately, with tears in her eyes. “But can’t you see that even though terrible things happen sometimes—things we can’t control—it doesn’t change who we are? You were a decorated, brave, and incredible officer. Yet something terrible happened anyway. It wasn’t your will, and it wasn’t God’s will. But it did happen. Like I said, God didn’t want your parents to die. Nor did He want your sister to use drugs. The important thing to remember is that what happened to them—and to Sarah—didn’t change who you are. Circumstances can’t do that. This is true for you—and it’s true for God. Sometimes things just happen. I know that someday God will be able to explain it to you in a way I can’t. But no matter what, God is still God. He still loves us no matter what we do. And He still gave up His only Son for us.” She shook her head. “But let’s not get into that yet. I’ll talk more about it later, but only if you ask me to. For now, I just want you to understand that no matter what, God doesn’t change. He will never stop loving you. And you are still the person you used to be. The great police officer you were before that terrible night. You didn’t kill that little girl, Erin. A stray bullet killed her. You weren’t wrong to take that shot. The truth is, you were trained to defend yourself if your life was in danger. I know, and you should know, that you would have laid your life down for Scott, even though he’d hurt you. And you would have done the same for Sarah. That’s who you really are.”

Erin wanted to fire back. Wanted to shoot down Kaely’s argument, but down deep inside, she knew it was true. It was as if Kaely’s words had finally turned on the light inside her heart so she could see past the guilt, the pain, and the anger. It wasn’t her fault. She’d only done what she was trained to do. There was no way for her to know that the bullet would penetrate the wall of that poorly constructed building and hit Sarah. She hung her head and began to sob. It was like a dam had broken inside, and she could no longer hold back the flood that poured through the cracks.

Kaely got up and came over to the couch. She opened her arms, and Erin fell into them. They stayed that way until Erin’s tears finally stopped.

“Where have you been?” Adrian asked Timothy when he walked into the station.

“Checking things out at the shelters,” Timothy said. “I thought that’s what you wanted me to do.”

“The chief didn’t send that text to you, Timothy,” Lisa said. “I did. I’m sorry,” she said to Adrian, “but you weren’t here, and I thought we should make certain they’re prepared.”

Adrian sighed. “Yeah, you’re right. And what did you find, Tim?”

He accidentally let the nickname slip. Timothy didn’t like using the less formal name, but at the moment, Adrian didn’t care. They had a lot of things to do that were more important than worrying about someone’s quirks.

“They need more cots,” Timothy said. “I called The Salvation Army in Knoxville, and they’re sending a truck with a little over a hundred more.”

“Thank you,” Adrian said. “I appreciate your initiative. And what about everything else?”

“We were short on blankets until Lisa called some of our churches. People began to bring in all kinds of blankets, bedspreads, and quilts. Anything they had to help.”

Adrian breathed a sigh of relief. “Well, let’s pray we don’t need to use any of them. But at least we’ve done what we could.”

His phone rang again. “Sorry. Just keep doing what you’re doing. Excellent job. Both of you.”

“Thanks, boss,” Lisa said.

“And, boss,” Timothy added, “in situations like this, you can call me Tim.”

Adrian laughed lightly. “Thanks. A high honor indeed.” The phone rang, and he picked it up. It was Merle, asking for help in case those who were trapped in his resort needed more food than he could provide. While Adrian told him about the facilities that would have food and shelter should his guests need it, he kept thinking about Erin Delaney and Kaely Hunter. For some reason, he felt unsettled about them. When he hung up with Merle, he planned to call them. Was he worrying for no reason? Kaely was ex-FBI, and Erin was an ex-cop. The skills they’d learned would be part of them the rest of their lives. Besides that, they were both smart. Savvy. They should be fine. Why couldn’t he get their faces out of his mind?