Page 41

SERENITY

I t had been one month since Cree was born, and life in Phoenix had been a rollercoaster of emotions, sleepless nights, and overwhelming love.

Adjusting to motherhood was easier than I expected—probably because Creed was so hands-on.

He was there for everything, never missing a feeding, never hesitating to change a diaper, always making sure I had everything I needed.

And I’d be lying if I said it didn’t feel… comfortable. Too comfortable.

That was the problem.

I’d let myself slip back into this space where Creed and I felt like we were a unit again. But we weren’t. I had to remind myself of that.

I sat in the living room, gently rocking Cree in my arms when I heard the front door open. I knew immediately who it was, and my stomach twisted in nervous anticipation.

"Gio! Wait, slow down, baby!"

That was Tasha’s voice, followed by the sound of small feet pattering against the hardwood floors. I barely had time to process before a tiny figure came into view, stopping abruptly just a few feet away from me.

I hadn’t seen Giovanni in months—not in person, at least. I’d only caught glimpses of him in FaceTime calls and videos Creed sent me. And now, standing in front of me in his little Nike sweatsuit, his hair freshly braided in six single plaits, I could tell how much he had grown.

He was taller now. A little stockier. His face was filling out more, looking less like a baby and more like a little boy. But his big brown eyes—the ones that always melted me—were the same.

He stared at me, his small face scrunching in confusion.

I knew this would be an adjustment. It had been months since I was a regular presence in his life.

I wasn’t sure if he even remembered me enough to know how much I loved him.

Kids his age either fucked with you or they didn’t, period.

I just hoped that he remembered after all this time that I was somebody he rocked with.

"Hey, baby," I said softly, my voice thick with emotion.

He didn’t respond. He just stood there. Frozen. Thinking. Processing. Then, his gaze dropped to the bundle in my arms.

"Who dat?" he finally asked, his voice small.

I smiled. "Come here, baby, I’ll introduce you."

He hesitated, rocking on his feet before glancing over his shoulder toward Creed, who had just entered the house. Creed gave him a reassuring nod, and after a second, Gio walked toward me cautiously.

My heart swelled when he got close enough for me to run my fingers through his braids, gently cupping his chubby cheek.

"You remember me, don’t you?" I asked softly.

His little brow furrowed. "‘Renity?" he asked hesitantly.

I felt my throat tighten, but I forced myself to nod, smiling through the emotion. "That’s right, baby," I whispered. "It’s me."

His small hands reached for my arm, touching me like he was making sure I was real. Then, suddenly—he smiled. A slow, big, beautiful smile that brought tears to my eyes. I barely had time to react before he climbed into my lap, wrapping his tiny arms around my waist.

I let out a shaky breath, holding him tightly, trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to spill. I missed him so much.

He pulled back just enough to look at Cree again. "She sweepin’?" he whispered.

"Yeah, baby," I murmured. "You wanna meet her?

" He nodded excitedly, suddenly forgetting all the hesitancy from before.

I carefully adjusted so he could get a better view of her face.

His little mouth parted in awe. "A baby," he whispered, his chubby fingers reaching toward her, but stopping just short of touching her.

I smiled. "Yeah, she is."

He turned to look at me, his eyes full of pure, unfiltered love. "She mine?"

I giggled, tucking a braid behind his ear. "She’s your baby sister," I told him. "That means she’s yours to protect. You gotta be her big brother forever and ever."

His face lit up with pride, and he nodded hard. "I protec’ her!" he declared.

I glanced up at Creed, who was watching the moment with a soft smile. He looked proud. Emotional. He stepped forward, rubbing Gio’s head.

"You love her already?" he asked.

"Yeah," Gio said matter-of-factly, before gently placing a sloppy kiss on Cree’s forehead. My heart clenched. This right here? This was everything.

I kissed the top of his head, tears prickling the corners of my eyes. Gio was always going to be my baby. Even though I wasn’t his biological mother, my love for him ran deep, and I would do everything in my power to make sure he always knew that. No matter what happened between me and his father.

Later that night, after tucking Gio in and finally getting Cree settled, I found myself in the backyard letting the cool Phoenix air fill my lungs. Holding a glass of wine to my lips, I took a quick sip, reflecting. Creed joined me not long after, hands stuffed in his pockets.

"You’ve been quiet," he commented, his voice low.

I sighed, resting a hand on my belly, a habit I hadn’t yet stopped since Cree was finally out of it. "Just thinking."

"‘Bout what?"

I turned toward him. "I think it’s time for me to start looking for a place in California."

I watched as his entire expression shifted. "Serenity?—"

"Just listen," I cut him off gently. "It’s not about running away, Creed. It’s about doing what makes sense for me. For Cree. I just… I feel like I need to be near my family. I need to start figuring out my life outside of… this."

His jaw clenched, and he stared at me for a long moment before looking away, exhaling sharply.

"You don’t have to go all the way to California," he muttered. "If you don’t want to stay here, we can find another place in Phoenix. A fresh start."

I sighed. "It’s not just about the house, Creed. It’s about us."

He turned his gaze back to me, searching my face.

"And what about us?" he challenged.

I hesitated before speaking.

"I think we need to figure out who we are apart from each other," I admitted. "We jumped into this so fast in the beginning, and I never really got the chance to know myself outside of being your girl. And you… you need to figure out who you are outside of a relationship."

He exhaled sharply, rubbing a hand down his face before shaking his head.

"I don’t need to figure out shit," he grumbled. "I know exactly who I am. And I know I don’t want you to move to another state and take my daughter with you. I already gotta deal with not seeing Gio on a regular basis, now Cree too? Nah."

“I don’t agree. I believe you especially need to figure yourself out. You jumped from being in a relationship with Gianna straight to me. Who are you outside of a relationship? What does that Creed look like? The one who taking care of himself, putting himself first over others?”

“I feel like you making excuses now.” He chuckled, harshly. “If you don’t want me then say that.”

“That’s not what I’m saying. If I didn’t want you, I wouldn’t even be having this conversation with you. I would be gone already, hell I wouldn’t have even come.”

"So what, Serenity?" he snapped, voice rising slightly. "You’re just gonna leave? Just like that?"

I looked away, not having an answer for him. Because yes. That was exactly what I was planning to do. He must’ve sensed my hesitation, because his expression softened, and he leaned forward, placing his elbows on his knees.

"Look," he started, rubbing his hands together. "I get it. I do. You feel like you need space, and I respect that." He paused. "But just… not yet."

I lifted an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

He ran a hand over his head.

"I planned a trip for us," he admitted. "Just the four of us. I rented a private villa. Time to just… be. Without distractions."

I swallowed hard. "You think a trip is going to change things?"

"I don’t know," he said honestly. "But I do know I want time with you before you make up your mind."

I sighed, searching his face.

Then—

"Okay," I said softly. "I won’t make any decisions until after the trip."

A flicker of relief crossed his face. "Thank you," he murmured. I didn’t respond. Because deep down, I wasn’t sure what I was going to do.

“How’s my God daughter?” Ari asked. We were on FaceTime, and I was enjoying the weather in Phoenix watching Gio run around the backyard. Creed was at the arena, had to go in early leaving me, Gio, Cree and Tasha here alone.

It had been a week since we’d had our conversation, and I would be a liar if I said things hadn’t been awkward as hell. In the back of my mind, I already had my mind made up that I wouldn’t be staying in Phoenix, but I was giving him his time to process it.

He’d sent me the itinerary for our trip in a month; on a private island near Antigua.

It was a smaller island- Jumby Bay Cove.

The house was beautiful, more space than we needed for just a small group.

But, he also planned on bringing Trina, who had been Gio’s nanny especially when he was alone with Creed, to help take care of the kids.

“She’s good, sleeping.” I glanced at the baby monitor at my sleeping angel.

It was almost annoying how much she resembled her daddy.

I put in all of that work to bake her for nine months just for her to resemble him.

But hey, they say the person you can’t stand the most during your pregnancy is who your baby comes out looking like.

Sometimes, I wonder if Sienna hated herself the most when she was pregnant with me.

“So, how are things… with Creed?”

I sighed, trying to find the right words to explain things.

“Weird, especially since we had that conversation a week ago.”

“He still not happy about you moving back home?”

“Nope. He wants us to be this big happy family and I want that too; but just not right now. I still have some healing to do and honestly so does he. I keep telling him, there’s a reason Gianna was so easily persuadable to get him to sleep with her.

I mean, that nigga folded asap. He obviously still has feelings for her. ”

“Maybe he doesn’t though Toot, maybe he really just fucked up and there’s nothing involved beyond that.”

“I haven’t told him, but I asked my Dad to look around for something for me and Cree. I’m going to give him his vacation but I already know what I want to do and it’s not here in Phoenix.”

“Renity, Renity.” Gio called out to me.

“Hey, I gotta go, I’ll call you later so you can see Cree.”

“Okay, love you.”

“Love you back Ari.”

I hung up the phone before turning my attention back to Gio as he approached me.

“I hungwy.”

“Okay babe, let’s get you something to snack on before dinner.

I walked him back into the house, going into the kitchen and looking in the fridge for one of the Go-gurts I knew he liked.

Tasha was at the stove cooking spaghetti and fried catfish.

“Okay, let me know when you’re done and we can get you cleaned up before Nana finishes dinner. ”

“Otay.” He replied placing the snack in his mouth as soon as he got it.

I turned to Tasha before placing the baby monitor on the counter. “Hey, I’m going to go take a quick shower. Cree may be waking up soon.”

“No worries.” She replied. “Dinner is almost done.”

I smiled before making my way towards the bedroom. Every single time I entered the room, I found myself thinking about the way Gianna waltzed her bitch ass inside like she owned the place, as if her name was on the deed and not mine. Maybe that was the issue, maybe I needed to sleep elsewhere.

Who was I kidding? Whenever I was in a house with Creed, my place was only in his arms.