Page 18 of Seduced By the Squire (Diamonds in the Rough #1)

Four days.

For four long, agonising days Duncan tethered on the edge of consciousness and Llinos went almost mad with worry.

“He’s lost a lot of blood and the shock and pain of his injuries will have taken their toll,” Bessie explained as she tied fresh bandages around his hands. The wound had been stitched and the two broken fingers straightened. Perhaps it had been a blessing that he had been unconscious through it all, for it would have been excruciatingly painful.

Llinos had insisted in helping and, mercifully, she had been allowed to. But once the worst was over the healer would not hear of her remaining in the chamber.

“Go and have a rest, my lady,” she said, shooing her away. “You’ve had quite a shock yourself and need your rest. I’ll take it from there.”

That had been the worst part. As Lady Llinos, mere guest to the castle, she had no reason to see to Duncan herself .

Because she desperately needed rest, she went. But as soon as she woke up later that afternoon, there was only one thing on her mind. See Duncan. And this time nothing would keep her away.

No sooner had she dressed than she went to see Bessie.

“How fares the patient?” she asked, doing her best not to betray undue anxiety.

“He’s well enough. Still asleep.” The old woman placed a hand on her shoulder. “It’s kind of you to take an interest, my lady, but you can rest easy. I know what I’m doing. Besides, all there is to do now is wait.”

The healer smiled, evidently thinking that she would leave now that she’d had her answer.

Llinos steeled herself. “I would like to see him.”

Those lessons in uttering difficult things were coming in handy. Without them she would never have dared voice out loud what she wanted. Even more importantly, she would never have been able to tell a whole assembly of men that if they examined her they would find proof she had been possessed by a man. But thanks to this she had been able to get out of the betrothal she didn’t want.

“Well, as I said, he’s asleep, so there is little to be gained by going now. ”

There’s everything to be gained! Llinos wanted to shout. I need to be with the man I love, with the father of my baby!

She needed to see him, to make sure he was safe, to thank him, to hold him. Oh God how she needed to hold him! Could she steal into the room? No, it was too dangerous. It would be better to appeal to the woman’s sensibilities.

“I’m sorry to insist but I really wish to see that he is all right. His injuries were quite horrific and he sustained them while coming to my aid in a most distressing situation. You see, I was being…”

She couldn’t finish. Just remembering the heat of Lord Masterson’s mouth on her breasts was enough to make her heave.

“I know.” The kind woman shook her head. “Shocking, that.” Then she looked at her more closely. “You have taken a shine to the young Scot, have you not? And why not. He’s handsome enough and, as you say, after what he did for you, I can understand that you would want to thank him. Go then, but I must warn you. He can be quite gruff at the best of times and he might not like being seen in a position of weakness, much less by a lady.”

Llinos almost smiled. Yes, she could well imagine he would hate it. Still, she had faced him in worse moments and she would gladly have him barking at her if it meant he was alive and well.

“I consider myself duly warned. Thank you.”

And so she was able to attend to Duncan. Luck was on her side. Later that evening two of the watchmen fell prey to bad indigestion. Between them, her usual patients and Lord Masterson’s bite wound, Bessie was busier than ever and happy to leave the care of a sleeping man to someone willing to take on the task.

But during the night the fever set in. Panicked, Llinos ran to the healer.

“That’s what I was afraid of,” the old woman sighed. “Fever is the real danger now. He will have to drink this infusion of yarrow and willow bark regularly and he will need to be sponged with cold water to bring the temperature down.”

“I will do that. You already have your own patients to attend. I do not know anything about indigestion and I cannot bear to go to Lord Masterson and see his…”

“No, of course not,” Bessie answered diplomatically. “But I am not sure this it very seemly. You, alone in the company of a half naked man…”

Llinos reddened. If the woman only knew! Sponging him was by far the tamest thing she had done to Duncan .

“It is no issue. You see, I intend to join the holy orders once I leave the castle and I will no doubt be required to take care of sick people in my new capacity.” The words passed Llinos’ lips easily. She would have done far worse than lie about her future intentions to be with Duncan. “This will be good practice for me.”

The healer’s brow cleared. “Yes, I remember Sir Benedict saying that you two would not marry after all. If that is the case, then he cannot object to you getting a glimpse of another man’s nakedness.”

“No, indeed.”

But she would make sure to get more than a glimpse.

The next four days were the longest of Llinos’ life. She stayed at Duncan’s side night and day, only leaving to see to her personal needs. At night she bolted the door and lay next to him on the bed, wishing she could hold his hand or wrap herself around him. But his fingers were bandaged and the last thing he needed was extra body heat, so she simply lay by his side, her ankle locked with his.

Finally one morning he woke up.

“Llinos.”

The word was no more than a whisper but she could not miss it from where she was. She placed a hand on his brow and found it cool to the touch. “Duncan. Thank God! I’m here.” Tears filled her eyes.

He looked pale and tired, and a short blond beard was covering his jaw. He had never looked dearer to her.

“I cannae move my hands.” He sounded puzzled by this.

“No, they have been bandaged,” she explained. “Don’t try to move your fingers.”

“Why? What happened?”

“You don’t remember?”

Oh dear. Could his memory have been addled by the fever? What if he had forgotten who she was? She placed a hand on his pectoral and reminded herself that the worst was over. His mind had blocked the horror of what had happened, that was all. Hadn’t he just called her name? He obviously had not forgotten her. In time, he would remember and everything would be all right.

“Where am I?” His words sounded slurred.

“In the castle. We had to tend to your injuries and afterwards you had a fever.” She hesitated, wondering if she should reveal what had happened or allow him time to recover first.

Duncan frowned. Evidently, he knew he was supposed to remember something but could not quite place what it was. Down in the courtyard a dog barked.

“Cwtch!” Duncan said, sitting bolt upright in the bed. “Masterson! Sir Benedict! The…” He stared at her, at her stomach. “The bairn!”

“It’s all right,” she said, her voice wobbly. He did remember! “The babe’s all right.”

“Thank the saints. And ye?”

“I’m fi — ” She burst out in sobs before she could even finish the word.

“Och, lass, come here.” He reached out to her and gave a curse when he found his hands bandaged. “Damnation, but I need to hold ye!”

“I need to hold you too.” She fell into his arms, draping herself over him. “Oh, Duncan, I thought I had lost you! You’ve been almost unconscious for days, I thought… I thought you would die from the fever! What were you thinking confronting a man with a sword?”

“What was I thinking?” he growled, tightening his hold on her. “I would have confronted a man with a mace and pike if he meant to rape ye! Dear God, will ye e’er forgive me for not being able to stop him!”

“Don’t think about it. In the end, nothing irreparable happened, Cwtch got to us in time.”

“The bastard threw ye to the floor, he ripped yer dress open, he placed his hands, his goddamn lips on ye, he frightened ye! That’s not nothing! I swear I will kill him for that.”

“Please. I don’t want to have to think about it ever again.” Llinos screwed her eyes shut. “Deciding to take Cwtch back to the castle proved to be the best idea I’d had in a long time.”

“That wee beastie! I swear I could kiss his ugly little face.”

Llinos let out a shaky laugh. “He’s not here. So why don’t you kiss me instead?”

His eyes softened. “Aye, that will be better.”

*

The kiss, delicious though it was, was cut short when reality slammed back into Duncan’s head.

He’d been lying on that bed for four days, which meant that there was not a moment to lose.

“Masterson will have told Sir Benedict what he saw by now, he will have told him about us,” he said, making to get up. “We need to — ”

Llinos placed a hand on his chest, forcing him to lie back down. To his utter mortification, he did not have the strength to fight her. “Hush. Don’t agitate yourself. Everything will be all right. Lord Masterson had no time to speak or even see Sir Benedict. By the time Bessie had tended to his wounds, it was too late. ”

“Too late? What do ye mean?”

She smiled. “As you know, Cwtch prevented him from presenting his version of events, barking every time he dared utter a word. Then when he was allowed out of his sick bed, ready to explain everything to Sir Benedict, there was no one to listen to him.” Llinos looked mighty pleased with herself. “He had already set off for my home in Wales to go and ask for Ffion’s hand in marriage. My cousin, remember, the one who’s in love with him?” she specified when he frowned. “After I lied about wanting to join a convent, I convinced him she would be the perfect bride for him. It’s not even a lie. I’m sure she will be an infinitely more suitable wife for him than I could ever be.”

“And he went, just like that?”

“Yes. After having secured his great-uncle’s approval, he did not dare delay before getting married.”

“The bastard!”

His reaction made Llinos suck in a breath. “I… I thought you would be pleased. Would you have preferred he stayed and insisted I married him?” she asked, visibly piqued.

“Nay, of course not!” he snapped. The mere idea of anyone marrying her sent his blood to boiling. “All the same, he was awfully quick to abandon his wronged betrothed, don’t you think? She is assaulted, he sees the scene with his own eyes, he is told she might be with child from the rape and he washes his hands off her and the bairn, riding off into the sunset to marry another! The man should be hung by the bollocks and left to rot for not caring about ye.”

She gave a tentative smile. “Duncan please, I understand your outrage and I thank you for it but really, ‘tis all for the best. I was not raped, Sir Benedict will marry a suitable woman and Ffion and I will both get the man of our dreams. Don’t you see? This means I am now free to be with you.”

Llinos placed a hand on his arm and smiled. A radiant smile that pierced a hole in his chest.

“Lass,” he whispered, covering her fingers with his bandaged hand. “Ye are not free to be wi’me, we cannot be together. Ye cannae — ”

“I will not hear any of this,” Llinos cut in sharply. “I am carrying your child, of course we can be together. Or… are you saying that you don’t want me? That you don’t want us?” Her other hand went to her stomach. It was still flat but she already looked like a protective mother, fierce, proud, and unutterably beautiful. “Is that what it is? You don’t want us? Be careful what you say, Duncan MacQuarrie.”

“Llinos, listen to me,” he said fiercely, drawing her to him. “I want ye both more than I want my next breath but… I have right to ye.”

“You have every right to a woman who chose you!” she cried out. “How can you think otherwise? You have as much right to this child we made together as I have, and half the responsibilities. Don’t you dare abandon me now!”

“I dinnae want to abandon ye, lass! Damn it, I need to stroke you!” he cried, looking at his useless hands, frustration making his voice gruffer than usual.

“Just hold me. I will the one to stroke you.”

Yes. Please. Stroke me. Hug me. Love me.

The words he had never even thought once in his life almost passed his lips. He wanted this woman to look after her, to pet him.

Gently she pushed a lock of hair from his forehead. “I bought Lord Masterson a new warhorse and ordered him to release you on pain of revealing to Lady Mary what he had done to me. He agreed. So your debt is cancelled. As soon as you’re healed we’ll leave for Scotland together,” she said. “No one will know to find me here.”

He recoiled in shock. Not only had she bought his freedom, but she wanted to flee with him! “Ye cannae be serious!”

“I’ve never been more serious in all my life. I told you, I don’t want to live in England, and I don’t want to risk returning to Wales. So Scotland is perfect.” She cupped his cheek in her hand. “Just like you. You ’re perfect.”

“Och, lass, ye are the perfect one, not me.”

“If I’m so perfect then you’re going to have to marry me.” She bit her lip and her eyes suddenly filled with tears. “I’m afraid, Duncan, I don’t want my child to grow up without its father, I don’t want to live without you. I love you. I could not bear to be apart from you. So you see, you have no choice. Unless you want to break my heart you’re going to have to make me your wife.”

He grunted. “’Tis blackmail.”

“Yes, it is. Deal with it.”

Deal with it.

Duncan blinked.

Was the woman mad to provoke him so? Nay, he thought ruefully. The minx knew full well she had nothing to fear from him. He would rather cut his own hand than harm her in any way.

Including breaking her heart, damn her.

And so he would have to surrender, do what she was asking – and get what he never thought he could have.

“Your father…” Llinos started, looking at him as if she feared an outburst on his part. “I’m sure he would have wanted you to be there for this child. He looked everywhere for you, just so he could be allowed to raise you. But you… You don’t have to scour the country. Your son is here already.”

She took his hand and placed it over her stomach.

She was right. His father would never have forgiven him for turning his back on his son or daughter when being kept away from his child had hurt him so much.

“As soon as you are ready, we will leave,” Llinos carried on, as if there was nothing more natural for a wealthy heiress than to contemplate marriage to a man like him. “But I think it would be better to leave separately.”

He flared up. “Why? Are ye ashamed of me? Because if ye are — ”

“No!” she cut in, looking horrified that he should even think that. “But I don’t want any questions asked, I don’t want to risk having anyone coming after us and stopping us. I want to disappear.”

“Nay, lass ye don’t.” He sighed. “Not really, and I willnae let ye. I willnae have ye hide like a criminal simply for wanting to be wi’ me. If we are to be together, then I want the people ye love to ken it. I willnae cut ye from yer friends and family. I will only marry ye if ye agree to invite the people ye care about to the wedding.”

Llinos started to cry. “’Tis blackmail,” she said through her tears.

“Aye. Deal with it.”

There was a long pause.

“Very well. Anything you want. As long as we’re together.”

“Together. Forever. Now kiss me.”

In the end it took them two months to travel back to Scotland, find a place to live and organise the wedding. By the time everything was ready and the guests had arrived, Duncan was frantic. Up until the last moment he had not dared believe that he and Llinos would actually get married. It seemed too good to be true.

And then she was here, at the entrance of the church.

Utterly transfixed, he watched her glide towards him. Dressed in an ivory gown embroidered with silver tread, she was a vision from the Heavens. Her stomach was full and her cheeks were flushed. She was carrying their child, the most precious gift anyone had ever given him, with pride.

“You came,” he said when she stopped in front of him .

“Of course,” she answered. “I love you and I thank you for insisting we get married in the presence of the people I love.”

She nodded towards her friend Angélique Delacourt, who beamed at them. The French lady had welcomed him as naturally as if he’d been a lord, helping him to accept their odd situation.

The priest cleared his throat, intent on drawing their attention back to him. With difficulty, Duncan tore his gaze away from Llinos, swearing to himself he would spend the rest of the night looking at his wife until his eye ached.

And then, only then, would he ravish her until neither of them could hold a coherent thought.