Page 15 of Secret Mission

Fuck. Crying guts me.

I scoop her into my arms, careful not to move her too fast, and settle her on my lap. She’s so damned small compared to me. Soft and gentle.

Through clenched teeth, I fight the memories of the crocodile rag-dolling her by the grip it had on her jacket.

“You’re fine. Nothing’s broken. You’re not bleeding. No one is shooting at us.”

Goddamn. I sound like I’m talking to a SEAL, not a woman who’s clearly been to hell and back.

She hiccups and buries her face in my neck. Right against the damp skin that’s covered with sweat.

Oh lord. God. Fucking hell. Please don’t…

I can’t take her touching me.

“T-thank you.”

As my nose buries in her hair, I fight and fucking fight with myself.

Do not inhale.

Donotwrap your arms tighter around her.

But what do I do?

Both.

And even though she’s been rain-soaked, half-drowned, and dragged through the mud, something about her sweet natural fragrance drives right into the center of my chest.

Arms cinching, I try to think of something to say, but my tongue is tied around my throbbing heart.

She feels good. Warm. Alive.

“You’re welcome.” My voice is rough, gruff, even. “I was scared as all hell that I was going to shoot you.”

Shaking her head, against my chest, she murmurs, “It would have been better than being eaten.”

“He… or she would have drowned you first.”

Oh, my god. Fuck my mouth.

She makes a rocky groaning sound. “You’re not big on comfort, are you?”

“I’m not wired that way, sorry. I can fight a crocodile, but don’t ask me to get in touch with my feelings.”

This time, she chuckles softly, and a chunk of my heart’s armor falls off onto the ground.

With a little sigh, she pushes her forehead against my pec and then leans back. “It’s okay, I’m finished melting down now.”

But the sheen in her eyes is like a lie-detector test.

When I brush my thumb over her cheek, I have to swallow the Sahara Desert in my mouth. “You’re brave.”

Those two words feel like they weigh ten thousand pounds, like I can barely shove them out of my throat with all of my might.

It’s the fucking truth, that’s not the problem.

No, the root cause of my breathless, weak state is being so fucking close to her.