Page 22 of Secret Love (The Single Dad Playbook #2)

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

ALREADY LOST

TRU

I’ve never had a night like the one I just had.

It was pure magic. I felt like I was living in a dream, floating on air…and like I would never come back to Earth.

The connection Henley and I share.

The intimacy that’s so easy and comfortable, while also being electrifying and mind-blowing…I didn’t even know that was a possibility, to have it all.

We stayed up all night, learning each other’s bodies, and he made me feel things I’ve never felt. He handled me like I weighed nothing, moving me into various positions and angles, doing most of the work, while I turned into a pleasure-filled puddle.

I still hear the way his voice rasped when he said, “Wait, don’t come yet.”

It was the time early this morning before we fell asleep. I thought for sure I was so wrung out with pleasure, I wouldn’t be able to orgasm even one more time, but I held on and he made it so good. It was wild and frantic and perfect, and I came twice. And again, later in the shower.

But wow, did we come crashing down.

Talk about a severe reality check.

The look on Cassidy’s face when she saw me in her dad’s shirt, cuddled up to him…I think it will haunt me forever. She looked devastated and shocked and so hurt.

I’m talking to Jacklyn and a few of the girls when Henley walks into the studio with Audrey.

No Cassidy.

Our eyes meet...I can't look at him without thinking of all the things he did to me last night. All the things we did. My cheeks heat. He smiles like maybe he's thinking about the same things. My smile drops quickly and I try to focus on what’s being said around me.

I want to rush over there and ask him about Cassidy, but if I talk to him, it feels like everyone will know what we did. I can’t even look at him without flushing right now, and all the mothers already watch him like a hawk as it is.

I want him to hug me and tell me everything's going to be okay. I want to take back the things I said about putting everything on hold, taking a break. I hated the whole Friends plot where Ross and Rachel were taking a break. It made me never like Ross again. And what I'm doing feels even more risky because we don't have years of friendship behind us like Ross and Rachel.

And why in the world am I comparing us to a 90s sitcom?

Henley and I are on shaky legs at best. What we shared last night was life-changing for me, but maybe he has nights like that with random strangers or maybe it used to be an everyday occurrence with his ex-wife for all I know. What felt special to me might not be as special to him and we could have risked his relationship with his daughters over something that was meant to be nothing more than a fun night together.

What if Bree is upset that he’s sleeping with her daughter’s teacher and goes to the school? I could lose my job…

I feel sick.

I watch as he lingers, looking like he wants to speak with me, but it's time for class to start. I move to the front of the class and watch as Audrey lines up with the rest of the girls. She waves at her dad and he lingers a few minutes more before ducking out of the studio.

I don't watch him walk away even though I want to more than anything.

This already hurts and we barely even got started.

After class, I hurry to the office, hoping to avoid seeing him again. I'm surprised he wasn't here waiting at the end of class, like he usually is, but maybe he wants to avoid seeing me too. I get through the rest of the classes in a blur.

Jacklyn asks if I'm okay, and I smile and nod. “I’m just tired. I didn't sleep much last night. Sorry if I'm acting like a downer.”

“No,” she tsks. “You're fine. Just not your usual smiley self.”

“I’ll be okay. I'm going to get some rest this weekend.”

“Sounds good.”

After we say bye, I’m still not ready to go home. So Earl and I wander through town, him happy hanging out in my hood. He’s almost getting too big to do that now, but not quite, although he is peeking out way more than he did in the beginning.

“Do you think you’d like walking on a leash?” I ask him as we pass one cute dog after the other. Silver Hills seems to be the dog mecca. I've seen every kind of cute dog imaginable here and it makes me wish I had one. Although Earl is doing plenty to keep me busy.

I pass the cute bookstore, Twinkle Tales, and decide to go in, making sure to tuck Earl lower into my hood. I'm startled when something rubs against my leg and look down to see a massive orange tabby.

“Why, hello,” I say, looking down. “Aren’t you beautiful and huge!”

A girl laughs as she looks down at me from a ladder. She’s beautiful with mahogany skin and natural curls held back with a colorful bandana.

“I hope you’re okay with cats. That's Hank. He’s got a loud bark, but he’s friendly.”

“Ooo, a cat that barks. I’m intrigued. I hope it's okay I brought this guy.” I turn and show her my hood, and Earl’s head pops out. “This is Earl. I have a hard time leaving him at home.”

“Oh my goodness,” she croons, lowering herself off of the ladder. Now I can see that she’s probably more my age than I’d originally thought. “What a cutie. I haven't seen him yet. I haven't seen you yet either. Who are you?”

I laugh. “I’m Tru. I just moved into town not too long ago and I'm loving it. I actually came into your shop once with my mom when we were driving through and have wanted to come back ever since I moved here.”

“I’m really glad to hear that. You would’ve met my aunt probably, when you visited before. I just recently took over the shop.” She makes a face. “It still feels weird to say that.” She lifts her hands. “She insists I call it my shop, but I think it’ll always be my aunt’s in my head.”

I nod, grinning. “I get that.”

“I’m Calista, by the way. Oh! Hey!” She brightens up even more when another gorgeous girl walks into the shop. Her cheeks are flushed from the wind and her dark hair is in a high pony but still looks long over her shoulder. “And this is my bestie, Elle.” She gets a sly look on her face. “Maybe you can take the place of being my other bestie since I’m always sharing this one with Rhodes Archer.” She rolls her eyes, but sings Rhodes’ name, and I laugh when Elle groans and rolls her eyes back just as dramatically.

“Oh, I’ve met Rhodes!” I say brightly, and the two of them look at me with interest.

Elle nods at me knowingly. “You do look like his type.”

“Oh, no. I’m not. We don’t. I-uh, no.” I put my hand to my face and laugh awkwardly. “I met him at Sadie and Weston’s house.”

“Aren’t they great?” Elle says. “But I assure you, you are Rhodes’ type.”

“Isn’t everyone?” Calista snorts. “Sorry, I didn’t mean it,” she adds when Elle glares at her.

“I’m not…Rhodes’ type. Well, I mean, I don’t think…he didn’t act…I like one of his friends,” I spit out. And then I cover my face in horror. “Oh, God. This is why I need to always be on the move. Apparently, I don’t know how to keep my mouth shut.”

I feel a hand on my shoulder and lower my hands to look at them. Both girls stand there smiling at me, barely able to contain their delight.

Calista’s hand drops. “Tell us everything. I’m dying to know which friend you’re talking about…”

The door opens and Sadie walks in. My cheeks flame and I fan them as I try to act casual but friendly.

“It’s a party,” Calista sings. “Hi, Sadie. Where’s Caleb?”

“Hi!” Sadie says. “Ahhh, you met Tru. Don’t you love her?”

Calista and Elle both say yes at the same time and my insides flood with warmth. Sadie hugs all of us and then leans on the counter next to me.

“Weston took him swimming at Bowie’s. He has the indoor pool.”

Calista and Elle both turn to look at me, trying to gauge my reaction and I laugh, shaking my head.

“What did I miss?” Sadie looks at me.

“Tru was just telling us she’d met Rhodes at your house…and she insists she’s not his type, but she likes one of his friends…” Calista says. She makes an apologetic face. “Sorry, there’s a reason small towns are known for the gossip.”

Sadie looks over at me and winks. “I think I have a pretty good idea.”

“My bet is on Penn,” Calista says. “That boy is fine. A little too pretty for me, but fine .”

Elle shakes her head. “I think Bowie. He’s hot and so mysterious. You never fully know what he’s thinking, but know he would lift a car off of you if he had to.”

We all crack up at that.

“Lift a car off of you?” Calista repeats. “Is that what every woman wants?” She lifts her hand. “Yes, please. I do.”

We laugh again.

“You’ve already got a man who would do that.” Elle moves a stack of books and pokes Calista in the side. “Javi worships the ground you walk on, and he’s hot as hell.”

“Oh yeah, that’s right.” Calista grins.

Sadie smiles at me again.

And I don’t know if it’s because I miss my mom, or if it’s because these girls are so fun and sweet and easy to be around, but I open my mouth and start talking.

“It’s Henley. But we can’t be a thing. We can’t. And it’s too late to even say that because from the moment we met, there was an instant spark, but I’m his daughter’s English teacher, and I also teach the dance class two of his daughters are in…and it’s just…I’m making progress with…” I shake my head. I’m talking way too fast. “It just can’t happen again.”

“Damn ,” Elle says, staring at me. The grin on her face just keeps growing. “I am in awe of you, girl. Henley Ward has been putting out the off-limits vibe for as long as I’ve known him. I've seen what happens when he goes out with the guys. The women swarm Henley, and I’ve never seen him pay them any attention. So when you say there was an instant spark, and it sounds like something has already happened , my hat is off to you.”

“Oh, there’s a spark between them all right. More like a raging bonfire,” Sadie says.

I fan my face, laughing.

Calista claps her hands. “I mean, I would have said Henley first, except exactly what Elle is saying. That man is so hot and he just keeps getting better. And look at you with this little age gap thing going. That is so sexy,” she says.

We all laugh and I put my hands on my fevered face.

“I need to forget about the sparks we might have because his daughter caught me at his place this morning. And I put an end to whatever we had just started.”

“ No ,” Calista moans.

“Aw, Tru,” Sadie says. “You guys can work it out, right?”

“I’m not sure. I think the timing is all wrong.” I lift my shoulder and try to act nonchalant about it, but I can tell they see through me.

This whole conversation is so much better than the tears I would’ve been shedding if I’d gone home instead.

I do see that in my future tonight though.