Page 13 of Secret Bratva Baby (Dubrov Bratva #16)

Rose could’ve blasted me with her anger. She could have lectured me all the way home. She could have shouted and gotten it all off her chest. But she didn’t. She didn’t say a single word.

Somehow, her silence is worse. It is harder to carry.

My body is still on fire after what happened in the safe room earlier.

Images keep flashing through my mind. And those sweet, hot sounds she makes.

Little moans and gasps that push me towards insanity.

Dammit, she’s so beautiful. Her scent is enticing, alluring and intoxicating.

I want her more than I’ve ever wanted her before.

Being able to touch her like that brought back so many memories. The night we lay beneath the sheets with them pulled up over our heads, a glowing white, soft light filtering through them as we spoke about how much we loved each other.

I remember it so clearly.

And it hurts.

It hurts that I threw that away, and I might never get it back.

Intense regret slams into me.

In a burst of uncontrolled emotion, I punch the dashboard.

Pain shoots up my arm, and I swear under my breath.

“Dammit. That was stupid,” I mutter.

It’s not like me to lash out in anger. I’m usually controlled and calm, even when facing difficult things.

Rose sets me on fire somehow. In good ways and bad ways.

She pushes me in ways I don’t fully understand.

I’m scared of losing her, even though I don’t have her.

Flexing my fingers, I check to see if I've done any serious damage. Apart from a few scraped knuckles, I’m fine. A few scrapes and a deep ache in my chest.

The house is quiet when I go inside. She’s nowhere to be seen.

Mila is busy gathering her belongings. She notices my expression and says, “I think she took Lily for a nap.”

“Thanks,” I mutter. “Thanks for coming over today.”

“Lily is an angel. She’s so sweet. I’m happy to look after her any time.”

I let Mila out, and when I’m alone again, I flop onto the sofa, wondering how I can make any of this right.

Rose doesn’t come down for dinner, but I have the chef take two plates of shepherd’s pie up to her room.

It’s Lily’s favorite food at the moment.

That and macaroni cheese. Rose would have snuck down quietly at some point to get the dinner herself, but I want to do whatever I can to let her know I’m sorry, until she’s ready to talk to me.

Over the next few days, though, it becomes more apparent just how upset she is.

Her walls are higher than ever. Her silence is deafening.

I’m starting to worry that things will never change.

She brushes past me with her face turned down, not making eye contact. When I watch her from a distance, she looks sad and lost.

Lily, on the other hand, is oblivious to the tension and often runs up to hug me, wrapping her little arms around my leg and making me laugh.

I scoop her up, cradling her against my chest as she giggles, trying to hang upside down so that I can spin her around. I did this two days ago, and now she wants to do it a hundred times. It’s funny how the smallest things bring her the most joy.

She’s laughing loudly, carefree and full of life, letting her arms flop over her head as I spin her, dangling from my safe grip.

I’m laughing too, loving every moment of the attention she gives me.

From the corner of my eye, I see Rose, leaning against the doorframe a distance away, watching us play.

My heart flips, and I stop spinning Lily, pulling her back into my arms to sit normally.

“Do you want to build blocks?” I ask, gesturing towards the Legos spread out on the living room floor.

“Fairy house,” she says, wiggling free of my grip.

We’ve already built two Lego houses for the fairies and hidden them in the garden.

At night, I sneak out to put a chocolate or a silver coin inside the little houses, and in the morning, I tell Lily that the fairies slept over and paid her to say thank you for the hotel.

It’s something my grandmother used to do with me, except the houses were made out of sticks and clay we found in the river—and they weren’t for the fairies, they were for the frogs.

My grandmother used to tell us stories about how the frogs were secretly our guardians and we should respect them.

Sitting on the floor next to Lily, I notice that Rose is still watching us.

I smile at her. “Come join us,” I say, gesturing for her to sit next to me.

She stands quietly, not moving, hesitating for a long moment before she nods and walks towards us. My heart flips nervously.

Rose settles down on the carpet, her eyes drifting over me. She doesn’t say much to me, but she starts helping us build the fairy house.

Lily chooses the colors and points to where we need to make the wall higher or add a window.

Soon, we are all so engrossed in the task that the tension between Rose and me seems to disappear completely.

I dare not push my luck, so I just go with the flow.

“Mommy must make a garden.”

“Okay, but aren’t we putting the whole house in the big garden outside?”

“Oh.” Lily presses her little finger against her lip, rethinking her request.

“I can make a bench over here.” Rose points to an open spot on the Lego board.

“Yes,” Lily agrees, the architect and project planner.

“Do you think the fairies will need a car?” I ask, running the wheels of a little racing car over the carpet.

Lily’s eyes brighten. “Oh yes, a red one.”

I scratch around in the toy box until I find the red one.

Lily gets focused on her task again, and Rose looks up at me. I can feel the heat of her eyes on me.

“You know, first thing every morning she asks me to take her outside to check the fairy houses.” Rose smiles sweetly. “Almost as soon as her eyes open, that’s what she thinks about.”

“She does seem to enjoy them,” I smile back.

There is a moment of comfortable silence between us as her eyes drift over my lips.

“Thank you,” she says, almost a whisper.

The warmth in her gaze sends a wave of joy shooting through me. A massive smile spreads across my face, and I feel my cheeks flush with heat. Since when do I blush?

I quickly look away, and Rose giggles.

“I mean it, though. With everything that’s happened, she could easily be stressed and having nightmares, but instead, she’s dreaming about fairy houses. Thank you, Luka, for making her feel at home. ”

“I love having her here, Rose,” I say, my heart pulling tight, fearing the day she might leave.

We spend the afternoon setting up the two new houses we’ve built, hiding one under the willow tree and the other at the tall monstera next to the pool. Lily marched around the garden three times with us following her, waiting for her to make her choice regarding location.

By the end of it, Lily is exhausted, and Rose takes her upstairs for an afternoon nap.

I’m happy.

Today was incredible.

There was finally a breakthrough, and Rose is letting her walls down, one brick at a time, but I’m patient. I can wait, however long it takes.

At dinner, she brings Lily down to the dining room to eat with me instead of hiding in their room.

I ordered takeout, sushi for the adults, and Chinese noodles with stir-fry vegetables for Lily. I also got us each a fortune cookie.

She devours the stir-fry eagerly.

“I had no idea she would enjoy stir fry this much,” Rose says in shock.

“Did you guys never get Chinese?” I ask, my brows furrowing.

She laughs, shaking her head. “We couldn’t afford takeout, Luka. Most of our meals were potatoes or ground meat, and carrots. It was good food. Healthy, but not fancy.” She smiles tightly.

My heart aches for her. “I’m sorry, Rose. I wish I could have helped, even then. I have so many regrets. I know I can’t change things now, but I hope you might one day understand how sorry I am for how it all happened.”

She presses his lips together and waves her hand to dismiss the conversation. “It’s fine. Um. We were fine,” she says quickly, hiding the emotion in her eyes. Guilt eats at me. They weren’t fine. She’s just too strong to admit it.

We eat quietly for a while until Rose starts chatting about work.

“I am still interested in doing the paperwork for those businesses,” she says, looking up at me with hope.

“You are?” I say in surprise. I thought she would have been scared away from the whole thing after Romain threatened us. I assumed that she was just waiting for the day she could get away from me and anything to do with the mafia.

“Of course. I’m excited, actually. It’s something new. I never enjoyed my last job. It was because of the boss, mostly. He was a proper asshole,” she laughs.

“So, the nature of the business doesn’t bother you?” I ask cautiously.

She sighs, letting the air slowly expel from her lungs as she considers her answer.

“The world out there isn’t a fair one. People do things to survive and make a good life for their families.

I spent years doing the best I could for Lily, working myself to the point of exhaustion and never having time with her.

She needs her mother. She needs a safe life, but she also needs her mom to be there to teach her about things.

Life isn’t black and white. Good and bad.

There are gray areas. I understand gray areas. ”

My eyes study her face. Her expression. The softness of her lips and the warmth of her gaze.

What she’s saying is a good description of how I view the world as well. It’s not black and white—it’s not as simple as being good or evil. I live my life in those gray areas she’s talking about. I try to be a good man, make good choices, and not hurt people who don’t deserve to be hurt.

Nodding, I smile at her. “I’ll arrange things tomorrow. You can get started as soon as possible.” I’m pleased she still wants to do this. It strengthens my ties to her. It keeps her connected to me.

Her face brightens at my words.

A sting of worry tightens in my chest. “Rose, you understand the risk?”

She nods. “I do.”

“You can’t go there alone. You need to take me or a security person with you.”

She nods again.

“Luka, I wasn’t born in this world like you. It’s new to me, but I’m a fast learner.”

I chuckle. “Yes, I noticed that about you. You have an incredible ability to adapt and find a way to be the strongest version of yourself in any situation. It’s admirable.”

She blushes, her cheeks turning soft pink.

I push my food around the plate for a minute, then an idea strikes me. “Have you ever shot a gun before?” I ask, remembering how awkward she was holding the one in my weapons room when she threatened me. It feels like a year ago.

“No.”

“Would you like to learn?”

She perks up, sitting straighter in her seat. “Definitely. Do you know someone who can teach me?”

I laugh. “I’ll teach you. And some self-defense moves too. There is no harm in making yourself stronger—in being prepared.”

“That would be amazing,” she says excitedly, her eyes shining.

There is my Rose.

My beautiful Rose.

Bright eyes and a wide smile.

“I’ll call Mila after dinner and make arrangements for her to come and watch Lily. Then you and I can have a lesson together,” I grin. “I won’t make it easy for you.” I wink at her across the table, and her eyes widen with amusement.

“I think I might surprise you,” she sasses back at me.

“You do have a habit of surprising me,” I muse.

Rose reaches out and brushes her fingers through Lily’s hair. Our daughter turns towards her mother. “Did you hear that, baby? Mommy is going to learn how to be a superhero.”

“Will you fly?” she asks.

“You never know. Anything is possible.” She glances at me as she says this.

Anything is possible.

It’s been better than a good day. It’s been an incredible day.

Before I go to bed, I call Mila. She’s coming in the morning to take care of Lily.

Tomorrow, Rose and I are going to spend the day together in close quarters, and I could not be more pleased about it.

Obviously, I want her to learn how to take care of herself, but more than that, I’m happy she wants to spend that time with me.

The more time I get with her, the more chance I have of making things right.

I fall asleep easily, excited for the day ahead.