Page 38 of Second Chance Fate (Hope Falls: Brewed Awakenings #5)
“I would get on one knee and ask you to marry me, but I don’t want to freak you out even more than I already am.
” He motioned to the machine, then placed the ring in her hand.
“I want to marry you. Not in a month, or a year, or a week.
I want you to be my wife, and I want to be your husband.
There are a lot of reasons why I want to marry you.
One of them is love. You may not believe me, but I do love you.
I love the mom that you have been to our son.
I love how kind you are. I love how resilient and strong you are.
I love that you laugh at your own jokes.
I love that you have put our son first, his needs first, and I want to be the person who finally puts your needs first, who takes care of both of you.
“Another reason that we should get married is that I absolutely am not going to let you go home when you get out of here?—”
“I’ll be fine; I’m?—”
“It’s not about you.” Caleb interrupted her. He was lying a little;, it was about her, but he couldn’t say that. And there was truth in his reasoning, too. “It’s not fair to put that on Owen. He can’t be responsible for your recovery. He’s got his own health to worry about.”
Caleb could see the battle going on behind Taylor’s eyes. He knew that the arguments he was making couldn’t be easily dismissed.
“Another reason we should?—”
“There’s more?”
“Yes.” He nodded. “As of right now, Owen is your next of kin. I think that’s too much for him.
Thankfully, because so many staff here know me, I have been able to get information and the same visiting privileges that a family member would have, but I hated not being able to say, she is my wife .
” Caleb felt tears begin to fill his eyes, but he did his best to hold them back.
This wasn’t about him. “You are my family. You and Owen are both my family. When you were in the ICU, one of the newer doctors dismissed me when he found out I wasn’t married to you.
I had to make him see that, married or not, I was the man that visiting hours didn’t apply to when it came to you.
” She grinned a little at the callback to Good Will Hunting.
“And I almost ended up in jail doing so.”
“I’ve already contacted my medical insurance, and I can add you and Owen immediately once we are legally married.
The coverage is much better than Medicaid for you and Owen.
” Caleb could see how overwhelming this was.
He hoped that she was taking in everything he was saying.
“I’m not asking for a traditional marriage.
I know that you’ve been through hell. I know I wasn’t there when you needed me most; whether it was my fault or not doesn’t change what you went through.
I’m just asking you to let me start to make it up to you both.
“You can have the master bedroom, Owen has the spare room, and I’ll sleep in the basement.
I just want you both under my roof so that I can take care of you both; that’s it.
I’ve already taken out a life insurance policy and named both you and Owen beneficiaries.
That is staying the same whether you marry me or not.
” Caleb pulled the paperwork from his back pocket and handed it to her.
Once she looked it over, he handed her another piece of paper.
“And that is a marriage license. It’s our marriage license. ”
“Marriage license?” She looked up at him.
“Yes. I applied online, and a friend of mine from the county clerk’s office, Belinda Santos, will be here in about an hour. If you say yes, we can get married today.”
“Today? What do you mean today?”
“Yes, it’s basically just paperwork. It would take less than ten minutes.
If we wait and do it in town, everyone will know about it.
Which, for the record, is great with me.
I would love that. I just don’t expect you to be on the same page as me.
I know this sounds crazy. I know that, but it really does make sense, to me at least. I totally understand if you don’t want to do this.
Or if you want to think about it. Or if you do want to, but you want Owen here.
We have talked about us getting married, and he seemed?—”
“You did what?!”
“It was hypothetical,” Caleb quickly explained.
“He asked me if I was ever married; I said no. He asked if I ever wanted to be married; I said yes. He asked what sort of person I would want to marry; I said someone like your mom. He said that was a good answer. I asked if he wanted you to get married again, and he said yes, but only if it was someone who made you happy and who would take care of you like you take care of people.”
She nodded. “Yeah, that sounds like him.”
Taylor was quiet, staring down at the marriage license in her hand. Caleb could see that she was mulling over the points that he’d made, which were good, solid arguments in favor of becoming legally man and wife. He just hoped she saw it that way.
“But what about all the Hot Pastor stuff? Don’t you want to date peo?—”
“No,” he quickly corrected her assumption. “I do not want to date. I want to have a family, and I do have a family. I might not have gotten it the most traditional way, but you and Owen are my family.”
She licked her lips. “So, we’ll be married on paper, for legal reasons, basically.”
“Yes.”
“So do we have to tell people we’re married?”
“Do you want to tell people?—"
“No.” She shook her head. “I don’t.”
He did his best to ignore the sting of rejection he felt seeing her reaction at the thought of anyone knowing she was his wife.
“Then no one has to know. I’d like to tell my parents when you’re comfortable, but I’ll wait until you are.”
“But if I’m living in your house, and people don’t know we’re married, isn’t that a bad look for a pastor?
” He could see the concern she had in her eyes for him, which meant she was actually seriously considering saying yes.
“I mean, I don’t know a lot about stuff like that, but wouldn’t that be bad? ”
An urgency of affection rushed through him as he leaned forward and brushed strands of hair that fell on her forehead, tucking them behind her ear.
She rested her cheek in his palm. “I’ve spent a good portion of my life dedicated to serving the people in my community.
I prioritized caring for them over myself and sacrificed my personal life.
But now, my priority is Owen and you. That’s it.
I don’t care what it looks like, what people’s opinion of it is, what people assume they know, or what gossip they spread.
The only thing that matters to me is that you are both safe, happy, and have everything you need.
That’s it. If anyone has a problem with how I’m going about doing that, I honestly don’t give a shit. ”
Her forehead furrowed. “Are pastors allowed to cuss?”
“Well, lightning hasn’t struck me down, so I guess so.”
She smiled, and he lowered his hand. “Are you sure, really sure you want to do this?”
“I have never been more sure of anything in my life.”
Taylor looked down, staring at the ring in her hands, and Caleb found himself holding his breath.
When she looked back up at him, their eyes locked, and she handed the ring back to him.
His heart sank like an anchor in the ocean.
He stared down at the solitaire diamond, and his heart broke into a million pieces.
He really thought she was leaning toward yes.
He did his best to mask his disappointment because the last thing he wanted was to make her feel like she’d done anything wrong by making a perfectly sane decision not to take this leap of faith with him.
“Okay,” she said.
His eyes flew up to hers, certain he must have misheard her. “What?”
“Okay.” She took a deep breath, and her chin dipped in a decisive nod. “Let’s do it.”
“But…” Caleb looked down at the ring.
“I can’t take your ring since this isn’t…you know. But, if you’re sure you want to do this then, okay.”
Caleb looked at her and knew it was completely wrong, but he really wanted to kiss her. Instead, he stood and pressed his lips quickly to her forehead.
“Do you want me to get Owen?”
“No.” She shook her head. “I don’t want him to think I’m doing this because I’m actually sicker than I am. Even if it’s just subconscious. It could cause him undue stress.”
“You’re right.” Caleb hadn’t realized the magnitude of what a balancing act overseeing Owen’s health was.
He couldn’t imagine carrying the sole weight of all those decisions on his own all these years.
He was so happy that now not only did Owen and Taylor have him, they also had his parents and the entire Hope Falls community.
He watched as the corners of her mouth curled as she looked down at the marriage license.
“What?” he asked.
“For my first marriage, I had the dress and veil, two hundred guests, and all of Martin’s unit came in their uniforms, and then I found out years later none of it was legal because he was married to someone else at the time.
Today, we’re going to sign papers while I’m in a hospital bed, with no guests, and no dress, and I’ll be legally married. Life is so weird sometimes.”
“Yeah.” And sometimes it’s perfect. Today, marrying Taylor in any capacity made Caleb’s life perfect.