Page 46

Chapter forty-five

That? Uh… It’s an apology brownie

Charlotte - 12 Years Ago

T he bus engine hums beneath me, a low vibration matching the mix of excitement and sadness swirling in my chest. I press my forehead against the cool glass of the window, watching as the camp fades from view. Summer’s over. Soon, I’ll be on a plane back to New Zealand. Back to reality.

As we pull away, part of me lingers, still lying under the stars with Jake. Sharing jokes and dreams, feeling like anything was possible. I close my eyes, trying to hold onto the memory for just a few more seconds.

Suddenly, the bus lurches to a stop. I glance up, confused, and that’s when I see him.

Jake.

He’s sprinting up the road, bag slung over his shoulder, hair a mess like he didn’t think before taking off. My heart skips, and before I know it, I’m pushing through the aisle to the front.

The bus door swings open and there he is, breathless and grinning like he’s just pulled off the greatest stunt of his life.

“What are you doing?” I laugh, stepping down onto the gravel.

“I couldn’t let you leave without a proper goodbye,” he says, catching his breath. “And to remind you… you sealed the deal, remember?”

I tilt my head, smiling. “The pinky promise?”

He nods, smiling wider. “Exactly. You promised you’d follow your dreams, no matter what. So don’t let any one stop you, okay?”

I roll my eyes but his words feel warm and sure. “You’re serious about this, huh?”

“Of course I am. You’re gonna do amazing things, Charlie. I know it.”

I smile, touched by his confidence. “Thanks, Jake. But remember, you promised, too.”

He laughs, nodding like he’s satisfied, then reaches into his bag. “Before you go…” He pulls out a small, folded piece of paper and hands it to me.

“What’s this?”

Jake’s smile softens, and for the first time I see a hint of shyness. “It’s my gran’s brownie recipe. You asked for it, and you’re special enough to have it.”

I unfold the paper, revealing the handwritten recipe. Simple and neat, yet priceless. I look up at him, my throat tightening.

“Jake… thank you.”

He shrugs, playing it cool, but I see the pride in his eyes. “Just promise you’ll think of me whenever you make ‘em.”

I nod. “I promise. And I’ll seal the deal.” I extend my pinky, and he hooks his around mine.

“Deal,” he says, voice rough as he kisses his thumb to seal it.

For a moment we just stand there, grinning awkwardly at each other. Before I can overthink, I step forward and hug him tight. He’s warm, solid, and feels like home.

“Don’t forget about me,” I whisper into his shoulder.

“Not a chance.”

I pull away, just enough to meet his eyes. There’s something earnest there, something that makes my heart stumble.

“I’ll miss you,” I admit.

“Same here,” he says, his expression soft. “But hey, if we ever meet again we’ll make more Mega S’mores.”

I smile, blinking away the burn in my eyes. “See ya, Jake.”

As I turn to climb back onto the bus, he calls after me in a mock superhero voice, “Remember, Lady Lightning —chase your dreams!”

I laugh, waving as I step up. “You too, Captain Thunder!”

The bus pulls away, and I watch him through the window until he’s just a speck in the distance. My heart feels full and heavy all at once, but there’s a new resolve in me. A promise to keep that spark alive. To chase my dreams, just like we promised under the stars.

***

Charlie - Present Day

I sit on the couch, Noah nestled under my arm, his small body warm and safe against mine. The day’s events have drained me, but all I can focus on now is the steady rhythm of his breathing. He’s here. He’s safe. For the first time in hours, my lungs feel like they can fill again.

Jake sits on Noah’s other side, his eyes following him warmly as he chats away. He’s relaxed, but there’s a tension beneath his steady exterior, like a rope pulled too tight. We haven’t had time to talk yet, not since everything today.

Noah squirms beside me, his energy fading into something quieter. He glances up at Jake, his voice soft. “You didn’t say goodbye before you left last week, Jake.”

The words slice through the room, unexpected. I glance at Jake, feeling the flicker of guilt pass between us. Neither of us was ready for that.

Jake shifts, running a hand through his hair. “I know, buddy,” he says gently, meeting my eyes for a beat before looking back at Noah. “I wanted to. But… I’m sorry. It won’t happen again, I promise.”

Noah studies him, his brow furrowing as if weighing the apology. Finally, he nods and leans closer, fingers reaching out to brush Jake’s knee, like he needs the connection.

The tightness in my chest loosens a little more. Jake’s become so much to all of us. Watching him with Noah, it’s clear how much we’ve all missed him.

But the fight—the things I said—they’re still there, waiting to be acknowledged. I owe Jake more than a quick sorry. He deserves better than the fear I threw at him, the doubts I let control me. But I’m not sure where to start.

My eyes flick toward the kitchen counter, where the brownie I made this morning sits under a cake stand. The one I planned to give him after my meeting, after I told him I was sorry. It feels small now, insignificant after today. But the words I iced on top are still true.

You’re the dream.

Noah’s voice pulls me back. “Jake, did you know the biggest volcano in space is on Mars?”

Jake grins, that familiar warmth lighting in his eyes. “I didn’t know that, but now I do. Thanks to you, buddy.”

Noah beams, sinking deeper into my side as he rambles about space. Jake listens, his soft laughter matching Noah’s energy, but his gaze keeps drifting to me, unspoken words pressing into the space between us.

The front door opens, and Meadow’s giggles suddenly fill the air before she’s even in sight. She bursts into the room, her face lighting up when she spots Jake.

“Dada!” she squeals, sprinting toward him. It’s a title that still tugs at my heart. Jake’s expression falters for a fraction of a second, but he quickly recovers, catching her in his arms.

“Hey, Little Lightning,” he says, pressing a kiss to her head. “Did you have fun at the party?”

Meadow nods, proudly flashing her goodie bag like a prized possession. “We had cake! And games! I got this!”

Jake settles her into his arms. “Sounds like a blast. I missed you.”

She snuggles closer, clutching his shirt. “I missed you, too.”

Nina enters, pulling off her jacket and giving me a sympathetic smile. She knows what happened with Noah today—knows how shaken I’ve been.

“How’s our brave boy doing?” she asks, ruffling Noah’s hair. He leans into her touch but stays quiet, s till a little lost in thought. Nina’s brows furrow, but she turns back to me, offering a soft smile. “You okay?”

I force one back. “Getting there.”

She nods, then glances between Jake and me with understanding before clapping her hands. “Alright, time for bubbles! Who’s ready for bath time?”

Meadow squeals and wriggles out of Jake’s arms, racing up the stairs. Noah perks up, following Nina out, leaving Jake and me alone.

The room feels suddenly too big, too quiet. The silence between us fills every corner, brimming with everything unsaid.

I glance toward the kitchen again, at the brownie on the cake stand. It feels almost ridiculous now, but it’s something. And God knows I need to start somewhere.

Jake follows my gaze, raising an eyebrow as he walks to the counter. “What’s this?”

“That? Uh… it’s an apology brownie.”

He lifts the glass dome, his face softening as he reads the message I’d iced on top. There’s something something vulnerable in his eyes as he studies it.

I shift awkwardly, suddenly feeling exposed. “I made it this morning, before everything went to shit. I was going to give it to you after work, to say sorry.” I let out a nervous laugh. “It felt like a good idea then, but now it seems...”

“Silly?” he finishes for me, though there’s no mockery in his tone. He’s waiting, watching me.

“Yeah,” I breathe. “Compared to everything else.”

Jake’s eyes trace the words I iced on top. You’re the dream . He’s absorbing the message slowly, piece by piece. When he looks up, his eyes are softer, almost encouraging.

“An apology brownie, huh?” There’s an edge to his voice, like he’s waiting for more.

I shrug, throat tight. “It’s a start.”

He sets the brownie down with deliberate care and turns to me. His presence pulls me in, and I search for the words, the courage.

“Charlie,” he says, voice wavering ju st enough to make my heart crack. “You don’t have to apologize. We both said things, but that doesn’t mean I’m walking away.”

I shake my head. “But I do . I said things that weren’t true. I hurt you, and I regret every word.”

Jake steps closer, and I make myself to look up at him, even as my hands tremble. He doesn’t interrupt. He just listens, eyes searching mine like he’s afraid to miss a single word.

“I’ve been thinking about that night at camp,” I whisper, forcing the words. “We promised to chase our dreams. And I thought coming to Denver was doing that. But then we reconnected, and I realized…” My voice breaks, but I push on.

“The dream I’ve been chasing my whole life is to feel the way you made me feel back then. Happy, safe. Cherished.”

Jake’s breath shudders, his jaw tightening as if he's physically holding himself together. He reaches out, his thumb brushing my cheek like he needs the contact to believe this is real.

“I love you, Jake. And when I said I should go back to New Zealand… that was fear talking. Not doubt in you, or us. I don’t want to lose us because it means everything to me.”

His forehead drops to mine, hands flexing against my waist to ground himself in the moment. I feel the warmth of his breath as he speaks. “You’re not losing me, Charlie. I’ve been a goner for you since we were eighteen.”

Tears blur my vision, but I press forward. I have to say this. I need him to hear it.

“I know I hurt you when I said you don’t have kids, because you do, Jake...”

His whole body trembles, waiting for me to continue.

“Alex may be their father, but you know them. You know what they love, what makes them smile. You know Noah loves his action figures and hates when they don’t stand up right, you know his favorite space facts. You know Meadow still needs ‘ Goodnight Moon ’ every night, even though she pretends she’s too big for it. You know how Noah’s face lights up building those complicated models and how Meadow only eats pancakes with pink sprinkles.”

Jake chokes on a breath, his eyes blinking rapidly as a tear slides down his cheek.

“Alex doesn’t know those things because he’s not here,” I whisper. “But you are. You’re here every day, thinking about us, loving us out loud with your whole chest.” My voice fractures, but I don't stop. “And we love you right back.”

Tears spill down his face now, but he doesn’t wipe them away. Instead, he yanks me into him, crushing me against his chest like he's terrified to let go.

“I love them, too.” His lips tremble against my forehead. “And I love you, Charlie. So fucking much .”

His lips tilt to mine before I can say anything more, and we kiss with all the things we’ve been holding back. Desperation, love, fear.

I lean back to look at him, fingers gripping his shirt. “I’m all in, Jake. I promise.”

Jake’s eyes shine with a mix of relief and love as he slowly lifts his hand, wiggling his pinky finger at me. “Seal the deal?”

A watery laugh escapes me as I lift my own hand, linking my pinky with his. “Seal the deal,” I whisper, kissing our joined thumbs like we did that night under the stars.

His lips find mine again, kissing me slowly like he’s committing this moment to memory. Like he’s reclaiming every year, every second we’ve spent apart. Gathering every fleeting thought, every quiet wish we ever made for each other, and pouring them into this moment. An invisible string pulls us tight and sighs finally, like in every universe, every lifetime, it was always meant to be us. Together.

The world blurs in our shared breaths, the soft press of his mouth, the way he holds me close like I might float away. With each soft exhale I let go of everything that came before him, all the doubt, every wall crumbling into the quiet between us.

He pulls back slightly, his breath mingling with mine. “You’re my dream too, Charlie. I’m convinced I was always made to love you.”

We stay like that, neither of us moving, just breathing each other in. The weight of everything slowly eases, each breath a little lighter than the last.

Jake’s grin curves, breaking the quiet as he glances back at the cake stand. “So, about that apology brownie…”

A breathy laugh escapes me as I wipe at me cheeks. “You want it now?”

“Hell yeah,” he says, eyes still glassy but full of warmth. “I’m starving.”

I watch as he walks to the counter, cutting a piece and popping it into his mouth. He closes his eyes, groaning low in his throat like it's the best thing he's ever tasted.

“Damn, it’s always so good.”

I chuckle, a mixture of shy fondness stirring in me. The same feeling I felt on that bus all those years ago. “I hope you remember I’ve had this recipe all along…”

Jake’s gaze darkens, the playful edge giving way to something deeper. He sets the brownie down and reaches for my hand, pulling me into him.

“I never forgot anything about that summer, Lady Lightning,” he murmurs, his thumb tracing slow circles over my knuckles. “Especially you.”

The charge between us shi fts, more intense and tangled in the longing after our week apart. I meet his eyes and feel the pull—something hungrier, something that’s been waiting to surface to let me know exactly how this night will end.

Before I can respond, the creak of footsteps on the stairs make us spring apart.

Nina appears, smiling. “Both kids are out cold,” she says, her eyes flicking between us with sharp amusement. “I’ll head out. Enjoy your night!”

I barely manage to keep my face neutral as I mumble a quick thank you. The second the door clicks shut, I barely have time to turn before—

Jake’s hands are on me.

He presses me back, his body caging me against the counter.

“You know,” he whispers, breath hot against my jaw. “I think it’s time we seal the deal properly.”

“Oh yeah?” I manage shakily, body already reacting to him.

He nods, and then his lips crash onto mine.