Page 3

Chapter two

Dark and bitter, like my soul

Charlie

M waaaarp, mwaaaarp.

God, it’s already 6:30am. I swing my hand out to grab my phone and turn off the most annoying alarm sound ever to exist, chosen specifically by me last night to ensure I wouldn’t sleep through it.

Jet lag’s a bitch, even after a full week here. In fact, it feels like it’s getting worse instead of better. But I’ve got no time to dwell on that right now.

This is day one of a new chapter, a fresh start for me and the kids. But instead of the excitement I expected, there’s an uneasy knot in my chest, tightening with every passing minute. I sit up in bed, kicking off the swathes of cloudy bedding and linen and take a deep breath.

I glance at the clock, realizing I’ve got just enough time to get myself and the kids ready before Zoe arrives. Rolling out of bed, I tiptoe into the hallway and head toward the kids’ rooms.

Meadow is still fast asleep in her room, her little face peaceful with all her covers bunched up on one side of the bed. In the next room , I peek through the door to see Noah sprawled out with one arm hanging off his bed. They look so small in this big, new house.

This house . It’s still so surreal being here, in a home to call our own, where we can finally breathe. Zoe found us a rental that’s somehow both cozy and airy. It’s a Crafts man-style with warm wood accents, loads of natural light, and a sprawling porch with a swing for watching the kids play in the yard.

The kitchen is a dream. Spacious, with a large island perfect for the kids to sit at to have breakfast. Or for me to bake at. Zoe even stocked the pantry with some essentials, knowing how much I love to stress bake.

I quietly make my way downstairs to start the coffee. The house is still, the only sounds coming from the gentle hum of the refrigerator and the birds chirping outside. I savor the calm, knowing it won’t last long. Today is going to be a whirlwind, and I need to be ready.

As I sip my coffee, familiar doubts creep in. The agency back home was smaller, more personal. But here, Pulse Creative is a different level altogether. It’s bigger, faster-paced, more corporate. They headhunted me, and they expect big things. And as much as I remind myself I’ve earned this, Alex’s voice echoes in the back of my mind.

You can’t make a career out of words and pictures, Lottie. That’s not a real job. Running away from your problems won’t fix them. Zoe must have had to pull a decent favor to land you this job.

His tone and that dismissive scoff prickles over my skin, dragging up memories I wish I’d left behind.

My grip tightens on the mug. Even miles away, his words have a way of creeping in, clawing through my confidence. But that’s why I’m here. To silence his voice for good, to prove that I’m more than he ever believed.

I shake my head, pushing his words aside.

I’m here, and I’ve got this.

“Mum?” Noah’s voice pulls me out of my thoughts. I turn to see him standing at the top of the stairs in his pajamas, rubbing his eyes.

“Morning, buddy.” I force a smile. “You ready for your first day with your sitter?”

He nods, though I can see the uncertainty in his eyes. “Is Jade nice?”

I chuckle, remembering how Zoe described her cousin that has offered to babysit today—young, energetic, and eager to help out. “She’s very nice. You’ll like her, I promise.”

“Okay,” he says, though he doesn’t look entirely convinced. “What about school? When do I start?”

I walk over and ruffle his hair as he walks down the stairs, jumping off the final step. “Soon, big guy. We’re giving you a little time to settle in first. But don’t worry, you’re going to make lots of new friends.”

He nods again but the uncertainty doesn’t leave his face. His expression mirrors my own worries, and I pull him into a hug, wishing I could take away all his fears as easily as I wipe crumbs off his face.

After I get the kids sorted with breakfast, I head back to my room to get ready. I catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror. Freckle-speckled skin, dark auburn hair in need of taming, green eyes that can’t hide the strain of the past few years. I’ll need every bit of my concealer and coffee arsenal today.

I get to work, choosing an outfit that feels corporate but creative—essential in this industry—and fussing with my hair, determined to look professional. Zoe would scold me for overthinking this, but she doesn’t have a decade of Alex’s voice under her skin.

The kids are clearly done with breakfast, their laughter echoing from the living room as they bounce around with an energy that only seems to exist in the under-six crowd. I head back downstairs, ready to meet the chaos as the doorbell rings.

Zoe’s voice fills the house. “Morning, everyone! The cavalry has arrived!”

She’s as bright and bubbly as ever, a whirlwind of energy in her chic blazer and heels. Her nails are painted hot pink with diamantes, her subtle rebellion against the power suits of our industry. She religiously gets them done every few weeks, and the designs are purposefully as far from corporate as possible.

Jade is right behind her—young, casually stylish, her wavy brown hair and warm smile instantly putting me at ease.

“Charlotte, this is my cousin, Jade,” Zoe says, gesturing to the young woman beside her.

“Hi, Jade.” I reach out to shake her hand. “Thanks so muc h for helping out.”

Jade waves off the thanks with her own smile, and I’m struck by how similar she and Zoe look. “No worries at all. I love kids, and Zoe’s been telling me all about your two. I’m excited to hang out with them.”

Meadow comes bounding into the hallway, her unicorn dress billowing behind her like a cape. She stops short in front of us. “Who are you?” she asks, her eyes wide with curiosity.

Jade crouches down, beaming at her. “I’m Jade. And you must be Meadow. I hear you’re a unicorn expert.”

Meadow nods enthusiastically. “Yes! I have a unicorn dress!”

Jade’s eyes widen in mock amazement. “No way! That’s the coolest thing ever. I bet we’re going to have so much fun today.”

Noah appears next, hanging back with a slightly more reserved expression, but Jade handles it like a pro, asking him about his favorite dinosaurs which immediately ignites his interest.

Jade’s natural ease with the kids puts me at ease too, and I can feel some of the tension in my shoulders start to melt away.

Zoe claps her hands together, bringing my attention back to her. “See? Jade’s got this covered. You, on the other hand, need to focus on kicking ass at the office today.”

“Wow, thanks. No pressure, right?”

Zoe rolls her eyes, thrusting a massive coffee cup out towards me. “I figured you might feel that way. So, I brought you this—extra strong, no syrup or cream, just how your weirdo ass likes it. Dark and bitter, like your soul.”

I take the coffee, laughing despite myself. Zoe’s energy is infectious, a force of nature that sweeps you up and carries you along with it. It’s one of the things I’ve always loved about her. When my own confidence wavers, it’s like she has enough for both of us. I’ve leaned on that energy more times than I can count, and today is no different. Just being around her makes me feel like I can handle whatever the day throws at me.

“Yes, because caffeine is great for anxiety,” I tease, but when she moves to snatch it back, I hold it out of reach. “No no, this is too strong for you. I should drink it just to spare you.”

“Thank God,” Zoe sighs dramatically. “I took one sip on the way here and it burnt my taste buds directly off my tongue. I’m pretty sure I can smell colors now.”

I snort, taking a sip of the coffee that’s somehow exactly how I like it, the caffeine hitting like a promise. “Thanks. I needed that.”

“Good,” she replies, nudging me playfully. “And stop fussing with your hair or whatever you’ve been doing up there. You look fantastic. Remember, you’ve got this job because you’re a total badass. Now come on, we’ve got an office to wow.”

I say goodbye to the kids, pausing at the door to watch them for a moment longer. Meadow’s laughter rings out as she shows Jade her favorite doll, while Noah is already deep into his toys, lost in his own world. My heart tugs a little, knowing how much I’m asking of them with this move, how much they’ve already had to adjust.

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I remind myself this is all for them. Every sacrifice, every moment of doubt—it’s all to give them a better life. But as I finally step out the door, I can’t shake the feeling of how hard it is to balance being a mom with everything else.

We head out to Zoe’s car, and as we drive towards the office, my nerves start to settle into a more manageable buzz. The drive to Pulse is short but feels longer as Zoe chatters away, filling the silence with stories about the office, the clients, the team. I try to focus on her words, but my mind keeps drifting back to the daunting task ahead. When we pull into the parking lot, my heart is pounding.

The building itself is impressive, sleek with glass walls and high ceilings that amplify the sense of urgency in the air. Everything here is precise, on-the-minute. It’s a stark contrast to the laid-back energy of New Zealand, but that’s exactly what I need right now.

Zoe leads me through the maze of desks and offices, greeting people as we pass. Everyone seems to know her, and it’s clear she’s well-liked. She introduces me to a few colleagues along the way, but I can barely keep track of the names and faces. It’s a blur.

Finally, we reach a corner office with a view of the city skyline. “This is you.” Zoe pushes open the door and ushers me inside.

It’s modern, airy, and a lot more than I expected. My eyes settle on a framed photo of the kids that she must have set up on my desk, and I feel my throat tighten.

Zoe drops into a chair across from me, arms crossed. “So, what do you think?”

“It’s amazing,” I say, though my voice wavers. “It’s a lot to take in.”

She gives me a look, leaning forward. “It’s okay to be nervous, Charlie. This is a big step. Just remember, you’re here because you’re damn good at what you do. And trust me, you’re gonna knock their socks off.”

Before I can respond, there’s a tap on the door, and a man steps inside. He’s tall and lean, with sharp features and a confident air. “Morning, ladies.”

“Morning, Marcus,” Zoe says with a grin. “Charlotte, this is Marcus Li. He heads up our tech accounts.”

“Nice to finally meet you,” Marcus says, extending a hand. “I’ve heard great things.”

“Great to meet you, too,” I say, smiling politely. He squeezes my hand a little firmer before letting go.

“I'm looking forward to working with you on some big accounts.”

“Likewise,” I reply, feeling his eyes lingering on me a little too intensely.

Zoe seems to pick up on it, because she gives Marcus a playful nudge with her elbow as she stands from her chair. “Careful, Marcus. Charlotte’s a heartbreaker.”

He chuckles, holding up his hands in mock surrender. “I’ll behave, I promise.”

He takes his leave, and Zoe turns back to me. “He’s harmless, I swear. But watch out—he’s got a reputation.”

“Noted,” I reply. “I’m not here for that anyway.”

Zoe smirks, clearly unable to resist. “Look, you’re gonna have to date again someday, but let’s just say Marcus isn’t exactly the Cinderella story I envision for you.” She smooths her blazer down then looks at me. “So we have some meetings lined up for you this morning, but I’ll be there every step.”

I nod, choosing to ignore her comment on dating entirely. At this point, I’m determined to be a spinster. “Thanks, Zoe. I really appreciate it. ”

She shrugs a shoulder. “Don’t mention it—I’m beyond thrilled to have my best friend here. Naturally, I volunteered to be your buddy.”

I raise a brow. “Hope the Board approved that decision.”

“Pfft, those guys don’t need to know everything.” She waves a hand like she’s dusting the thought away.

As we leave my office and head down the hallway, I feel like I’m on the edge of a make or break moment. This is it. The start of something new. And while I’m still terrified, I’m also determined. I’m going to make this work.

Before we reach a board room for our first meeting, Zoe nudges me with her elbow. “Oh, and by the way, I’ve got something fun planned for this weekend.”

“Oh yeah?”

“An ice hockey game! The Colorado Storm have their home opener, and I’ve got great seats. You can’t live in Denver and not go to a game. I won’t allow it.”

I chuckle, appreciating Zoe's enthusiasm. “Alright, sounds fun. I’ve never been to an ice hockey game before.”

“Trust me, you’re going to love it," she says, her excitement building. “And who knows, you might even get to meet some of the players afterwards. They’re pretty cool guys.”